by Free Britney at . Comments

Last night on The City, Whitney Port decided it was time she started dating again. MTV apparently agreed and dug up some guy named Freddie Fackelmayer.

Below, our staffers review the latest episode of The Hills spinoff and quote-unquote workplace drama, awarding and deducting as many points as we see fit ...

Whitney and Samantha Swetra compare designer shoes to boroughs of New York City. Even Gossip Girl wouldn't try to fabricate those stereotypes, but Plus 4.

At Elle, Joe Zee totally loves Olivia Palermo. Erin Kaplan totally doesn't! This not only feels contrived, we've been over it about 375 times by now. Minus 5.

Roxy Olin hangs out with a guy named Zac and expresses that she's jealous of Whitney and her life. Refreshing honesty, and use of a bra as a top. Plus 3.

Whitney decides she's going to date again. Enter Harry Fackelmayer, Sam's cute friend, who totally has a hot older brother! What are the odds? Minus 2.

Whitney agrees to meet up with Freddie Fackelmeyer at a barbecue. One that happens to be held at the apartment of Adam Senn and Whit's ex, Jay Lyon (who's out of town). How downright Kristin Cavallari of Whitney Port to show. Plus 7.

Kelly Cutrone tells Whitney to pee on the wall of the apartment to mark her territory. Plus 5, because that's funny stuff to hear from your boss, although we would have preferred if she instructed Whitney to top shelf the bathroom.

Adam Senn is a moron, but no longer really on the show, so just Minus 1.

Speaking of people who need to get kicked off the show, when will MTV pull the plug on Olivia Palermo? She has no redeeming qualities, her life is boring and has nothing to do with Whitney. Break out the pink slip already! Minus 24.

Putting aside the fact that his name is Freddie Fackelmayer, this Freddie Fackelmayer seems like a fairly large douche. La dee freakin' da, he works on Wall Street, wears preppy clothes and talks about surfing. Are we supposed to care? Minus 17.

Throw in another Minus 10 for the fake tan. In the Northeast.

But Plus 16 because we heard that they broke up before we even knew they dated, which is both hilarious and slightly comforting. Whit is redeemed. A little.

TOTAL: -24. SEASON TOTAL: -17. This week's scores are skewed by the sleep-inducing awfulness that is Olivia, but still, mediocre overall. Step up, City!

Whitney Port Cleavage Photo

Whitney Port and Freddie Fackelmeyer. Yes, that's really him.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Last night on The City, Whitney again took Roxy's advice and tried to further her fashion aspirations, while Olivia butted heads with Erin yet again at Elle.

Below, our staffers review the latest episode of the new "workplace drama" (slash The Hills spinoff), awarding and deducting as many points as we see fit ...

Whitney and Lauren: VH1 Divas

Whitney Port has by far the best pronunciation of any celebrity. Girl paid attention in school. We even love how she says "Previously. On. The. City." Plus 2.

This isn't really relevant, but Spencer Pratt seemed pretty certain on Twitter that Whitney had plastic surgery in high school. Say it aint' so, Whit! Minus 1.

Roxy Olin on Whitney's designs: "I would definitely wear like half of those sketches. I'm very impressed." Plus 1 for that obviously backhanded compliment.

Surprise, surprise, Olivia Palermo looks bored and passive-aggressively feuds with Elle PR boss Erin Kaplan for the third consecutive week. Zzzz. Minus 3.

Kelly Cutrone rules. Plus 4. She doesn't beat around the bush at all when criticism is needed, but also tells Whitney Port she'll always be her "loyal bitch."

At the Roberta Freyman Showroom, and Rachel Roy's offices, Olivia attempts to show that she can hack it in this business. Can she? Still unclear to us, but apparently yes, according to her boss. Plus 2 for how much Erin hates it.

Minus 1 for Samantha Swetra trying to rip off that cute Lauren Conrad hairstyle!

Roxy is the Stephanie Pratt of The City. Useless, and just kinda there. Minus 3.

The Bergdorf Goodman buyer Whit meets with is named Sunni. Yes, Sunny, only spelled wrong. Minus 1. But Plus 2 for giving it to Whitney straight and kind of blowing her off. You can't expect to be a famous designer overnight!

Kelly on Whitney's visit to Sunni, which was Roxy's idea: "Yeah. It's always a good move to take advice from a girl from California who's been in New York all of two weeks and knows [bleep]." Burn! So sarcastic. So true. Plus 5.

Whitney Port as a celebrity fashion designer is something we can actually kind of buy. She seems invested in her career and at least semi-legit. We're only giving it a Plus 3, though, because that doesn't always make it fun to watch.

TOTAL: +10. SEASON TOTAL: +7. Not necessarily the most compelling half hour, but refreshingly light on the staged confrontations and BS this week.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Last night on The City, Whitney Port's pal Roxy Olin made quite a splash during one of her first days on the job, while Olivia Palermo struggled yet again at Elle.

Below, our staff reviews the latest episode of the new "workplace drama" (and The Hills spinoff), awarding and deducting points as we see deem appropriate ...

City Pair

Roxy Olin: "I feel like I can get Kelly in, like, a second. I am, like, so serious about work." No. If you have to say that, girlfriend, it ain't true. Minus 7.

Kelly Cutrone drives a Ford so she doesn't get carjacked in NYC. Plus 4.

Meanwhile, over at Elle, Erin Kaplan assigns Olivia Palermo to buy some fake handbags off the street for an upcoming segment they're doing. The mere thought of this has gotta hurt for a silver-spoon fed rich girl like Olivia. Plus 3.

Their little sting not only involves a girl who's a quasi-famous socialite and on a reality TV show, but involves an MTV crew filming it. Real discreet. Minus 5.

In the end, Olivia can't even do this right. Work is, like, so hard compared to what she normally does. Which is, like, go to fancy parties and stuff. Minus 2.

Holy hell, that is one skinny model at the photo shoot. We're talking like Mischa Barton style. Minus 3. Way to promote a healthy body image, gang.

Roxy's big idea is for the model to get topless. A model for jeans. This is treated as if it were a revolutionary concept. Has no one seen a Calvin Klein ad before? All of their models are topless! Not that we're complaining. Even.

Plus 5 for Whitney warning Roxy that Kelly would be pissed if she didn't ask her before pitching this idea, and for being right. Always trust sage Whitney.

Poor Whitney Port worries that she's seen as the little girl that people walk all over. Don't be silly, Whit. You're the tall girl people walk all over. Minus 2.

The shady bag dealer is wearing a Konvict Muzik jacket. Akon would be proud. Plus 5.

TOTAL: -2. SEASON TOTAL: -3. Try it they might to make all this interesting, The City sort of falls short on execution. A lot more could have been done with Olivia's handbag drama, and there was far too little Whitney in general.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Last night on the season premiere of The City, Whitney Port was greeted by old friend Roxy Olin, who she tried to help find a job at People's Revolution. Meanwhile, at Elle, Olivia Palermo clashed big-time with new boss Erin Kaplan.

Below, our staff reviews the first episode of the new iteration of MTV's Whitney-centric Hills spinoff, awarding and deducting points as we deem appropriate ...

Whitney Port, Jay Lyon Photo

In the opening intro, Whitney reflects that nothing is the same as when she first moved to New York. In other words, MTV revamped the whole thing. Minus 2.

Roxy Olin makes her grand entrance two seconds in. Peeps are sure to mention her first and last names whenever they reference her. Solid marketing. Plus 3.

Whitney lives in the West Village now. Even, since both that area and Gramercy Park are quite trendy. Just pointing out that EVERYTHING is SO different now.

Olivia Palermo was apparently retained, and got a job at Elle magazine. Erin Kaplan is introduced as her boss. She's a tough cookie! Must. Create. Conflict. Minus 1.

Erin and her boss discuss how they're going to "break" Olivia and knock this "social" off her high horse. We're holding out hope for full-on hazing. Plus 6.

Whitney and Roxy meet for lunch and talk about how great it is to be single. Roxy reminds us a little of Stephanie Pratt. That's not a compliment. Minus 8.

Roxy may have been onto something when she bashed Whitney's fashion sense. Whit's outfit on the roof is heinous. Plus 1 in any case, though, because she's just so cute talking about how she doesn't want to annoy the neighbors.

"Do your job," Olivia instructs Erin, having been at Elle herself for like a day. Minus 3 for her pompousness, and Minus 2 more for The City casting another Erin right after Whitney's friend Erin Lucas got axed for being dull. Confusing!

Kelly tells Whitney Port that she hopes her friends are worth it and treat her as nicely as she treats them. Words to live by from sage Mrs. Cutrone. Plus 7.

Five guys and 30 girls at Roxy's party ... What's the opposite of a sausage-fest? Plus 3 for the girl who complained about this, but Minus 5 for the neighbor who called the cops on a pretty tame gathering. How lame is Whitney's building?

TOTAL: -1. Not the worst we've ever seen by far, but The City 2.0 still needs to step it up and decide what the heck it is before it becomes a must-see.

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

This just in: Whitney Port is boring.

It took one season of The City for MTV to come to this realization, so the network has hired Port's friend Roxy Olin to come aboard the reality show.

Adam Senn

The daughter of actors Ken Olin and Patricia Wettig, Olin will work for People’s Revolution and move in with Whitney. She spoke to People this week about her role on the series, which premieres Tuesday.

On adjusting to life with cameras around: Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve liked to perform. I like the attention; I’ll be honest. Whitney is so used to it that I had to jump in really quickly to get as comfortable as she is. I was like, “You’re really going to wake up and go on camera right now?” I was like, “I’m going to wake up at 6 and put on a little bit of makeup.” And then you just decide to stop doing that.

On preparing for fame: They’re only showing one part of who I am. They make me out to be a little b—-, but I’m not really at all. And Whitney is one of my best friends in the world. We live together and we’re really close, and I think having that relationship with her and having her show me the way was okay. I also have my [acting job on] Brothers & Sisters that I’m doing at the same time, and I feel like I’m honoring the art that I do — and I’m doing this show where I get to have so much fun.

I don’t think it’s real. Whitney’s like, “Get ready. It’s going to hit. And it happens overnight.” And I’m like, “Yea, uh-huh, it’ll never happen,” because I’m so used to her going through it. I’m excited and a little bit nervous. I know you’re only seeing a part of myself because I still have my own life, my own privacy and my friendship with Whitney is really strong and I have someone to go through it with, and that’s really lucky.

Roxy Olin Biography

Pic of Roxy Olin Roxy Olin is actually the daughter of actress Patricia Wettig. She's appeared on three episodes of Brothers & Sisters, on which her... More »
Full Name
Roxy Olin
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