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Ronnie Magro from Jersey Shore is going all out.

For his 25th birthday party this weekend, Ron-Ron has over $11,000 worth of Grey Goose and Dom Perignon ready to flow like water. By the end of the night, he'll be incoherent, hooking up with 2-3 girls and starting fights.

Ron Ron

Oh wait, that's every time he goes out ...

It's an event you don't want to miss.

As soon as Ronnie Magro sits down at his VIP table at Jet nightclub in Vegas, he'll get two magnum bottles of Goose ($950 each) and five of Dom ($1,875 each).

It's a slight step up from Ron-Ron Juice for the big night.

That's a grand total of $11,275, but the nightclub is comping it, not to worry. Joining Ron will be girlfriend Sammi Giancola, who will undoubtedly act like a b!tch.

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Those hoping for major fireworks or knock-down, drag-out brawls on the Jersey Shore Season 2 reunion special last night came away sorely disappointed.

On some reality shows, the reunion special is the best part. It's when Teresa Giudice flips tables and labels Danielle Staub a prostitution whores. Not here.

These people are all flirting with prostitution whore status, too. Anyway, here's THG's usual +/- recap of last night. Aww yeah, reunion show recap YEAH!!

Ronnie and JWoww

There's no love lost between Ron and JWoww after The Note.

One could argue this show is depressing, and that its cast is a bunch of losers who reflect badly on our society. Or one could say It's T-shirt tiiiiiime!! Plus 7.

Could host Julissa Bermudez be more robotic? They should have gotten Angelina Pivarnick to host without the cast knowing. We'd pay to see that. Minus 5.

Speaking of Ange, Ronnie had one of the best Jersey Shore quotes last night: "How could you not smush if you get Fossil watch? And it was white!" Plus 9.

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After some skirmishes but a lack of fireworks, the second season of Jersey Shore went out with a thud. Not really a bang. Pauly D didn't even try to get it in!

There was a trip to the swamp, a feud between friends, a last hurrah at the club, and a great line or two, but "Back Into the Fold" was more filler than finale.

Below, THG breaks down the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's Season 2 finale in its patented +/- recap. Aww yeah, last recap YEAH!!

At the Glades

They really dragged this season of Jersey Shore out.

The gang heads to the Everglades. MTV is really milking the Florida thing. Minus 5.

Sitch scares JWoww with his frog legs. We mean actual dismembered frog parts, not his own legs, which are frog-like compared to that HGH-enhanced chest. Plus 4.

The restroom tryst starring the Situation during the last night at the club might have set the sanitary bar lower than ever. Not a small feat for Jersey Shore. Minus 6.

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by Free Britney at . Comments

Last night's Jersey Shore was titled "Deja Vu All Over Again." Fitting, as the plight of Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino continued for a second straight week.

After the self-proclaimed King of Pimps ran afoul of Snooki last week, he struck out with more girls, got the gang booted from da club and failed as a wingman.

We felt bad ... for Pauly D. Below, THG breaks down the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's episode of the show in its patented +/- recap ...

GTF Out!

Not DTF? Then GTF out!

Snooki becomes homesick after saying goodbye to her friend Ryder and contemplates leaving. Minus 7, because we know filming ends in a matter of days.

The Situation kicks a girl out of his bed after she tells him she doesn't want to hook up, leading to one of our favorite exchanges this season. Sitch: "Don't come over to somebody's house at f*%king 5 a.m. and expect to play checkers." Non-DTF Girl: "I never said anything about checkers, OLD MAN!" LOL. Guy is like 28. Plus 28.

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by Free Britney at . Comments

Ronnie Ortiz-Magro has it all figured out.

The Jersey Shore star was caught cheating multiple times on girlfriend Sammi Giancola during Season 2 in Miami, but he knows that as long as he apologizes and says how atrocious his behavior was, her pathetic ass will take him back.

Done and done.

SamRon

SELF RESPECT: "Sweetheart" Sammi Giancola has none.

"When I saw myself with those girls [it] was, 'Wow, you're the man right now at the club. You look f*%king awesome,'" he says of his wild Jersey Shore days.

But, then he adds: "And then when I go home to Sam, I'm like, 'Wow, I'm embarrassed. I'm ashamed of myself. I'm embarrassed about what I did to her.'"

Sure you are, man. Just stick to the script.

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by Free Britney at . Comments

We love us some Jersey Shore, but this week let us down a little.

Last week's epic throwdown would have been a fitting end to the South Beach venture, wrapping up the sophomore season of the MTV hit at an even 10 episodes.

After that scintillating drama, this week felt like filler.

Still, THG's here as always to break down the best Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's installment of the show in its patented +/- recap below ...

Ron and Sam Pic

Ronnie and Sammi scenes make for a Jersey Snore.

Angelina Pivarnick is gone, and we have to give that a Minus 15. Painful as she can be at times, that spark, that common enemy, was sorely lacking Thursday. Sigh.

JWoww: "I like my boobs." Money does buy nice things. Plus 4.

Totally random, but Plus 13 for last night's Bones. Follow the link to see why. If The Situation actually guest starred like they wanted, we might score it even higher.

Wanting to save a lobster, Snooki and JWoww thought lobsters ate insects and put it in a bowl of fresh water. Public schools, you get an EPIC FAIL. And a Minus 12.

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Oh, Angeliner. We're sort of going to miss you.

The second-grade grammar, the lack of personal hygiene, the drama. The house won't be the same, even if it's better off without this classy Staten Island product.

Following many near-fights and one epic throwdown, Angelina Pivarnick bid farewell to Jersey Shore for the second straight year. Like we said, for the best.

As always, THG's here to break down all the best Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's installment of the show in its patented +/- recap below ...

Eff Off

Angelina Pivarnick summed up in a single image.

Angelina Pivarnick deserves a Plus 10 right off the bat for getting every single cast member - most of whom are genuinely nice people despite their trashy antics - to despise her. A rare feat. Drama sometimes happens, but this girl just creates it.

"I think Angelina loves my sloppy seconds," Snooki stated. "She goes to Vinny and she's trying to go to what's-his-name. Like, what are you doing? If you wanna make out with me, just ask. I will say yes." Gross, really? Minus 8.

Pauly D is seriously wifing up his Cuban girl! Plus 5.

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by Free Britney at . Comments

Silly us. We will never again doubt Jersey Shore's ability to lower the bar. Just when you think it cannot get more tasteless or hilarious, you are proven wrong.

Not one week goes by that we, as viewers, aren't introduced to fist fights, terrible grammar, pseudonyms for bodily functions and thoroughly revolting situations.

As always, THG's here to break down all the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's installment of the show in its patented +/- recap below ...

JWOWW and Tom

JWoww and her Guido Du Jour have it out.

Plus 9 for the stomach-churning double entendre of the episode title, "Dirty Pad."

JWoww and her man solve arguments by picking each other’s noses. Minus 2.

Angelina, Ron and Sam take Jose out for his birthday. Ron: "Jose is definitely getting played. (pause) Like a piano. He's getting cheated on by a dirty piano." Plus 11.

Angelina takes Jose into the Smush Room but refuses to hook up with him. Minus 3. Then she lies about hooking up with him in the Smush Room. Minus 4 more.

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A very special episode of Jersey Shore preceded Sunday night's MTV Video Music Awards. Then its cast members made a special appearance on the white carpet.

When it comes to style, Ronnie Magro, Mike Sorrentino (The Situation) and Paul DelVecchio (Pauly D) certainly have their own. And industrial quantities of gel.

Which star looked best (or least bad) last night? Vote below!

Three Dudes

Which Jersey Shore star's VMA style do you like best?

 

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Last night on Jersey Shore, the fallout from Vinny's smushing session with Angelina lingered. Meanwhile, Situation exceeded even his own standards for creepiness.

Airing as the MTV Video Music Awards lead-in, the special Sunday episode did not lack for humor, drama or sleaziness. These people need to be tested. Now.

As always, THG is here to break down some of the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from "All in the Family" in its patented plus-minus recap below ...

Angelina and Jose

Poor Jose. Fool's getting straight up played by Angelina.

Angelina smushing Vinny while sort of dating Jose pissed off everyone in the house. Except Ronnie, who says she's got game. Hey, he's not a hypocrite! Plus 8.

The Situation is incredulous, calling her "the Staten Island Ferry ... everybody gets a ride, and it's free." LOL, but Minus 3, because "his boy" Ron is the same.

Snooki on Ange: "You had my sloppy seconds. Good for you. And obviously you're loosey goosey because he got in it." So wrong on so many levels. Minus 19.

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Ronnie Magro Biography

Sammi and Ronnie Ronnie Magro stars on Jersey Shore on MTV. He is a muscle-bound hothead but a softie at heart. He's currently dating Sammi from the show.... More »
Full Name
Ronnie Magro
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