This week on Jersey Shore, Vinny and Pauly road tripped it to Staten Island, JWoww grew suspicious of Roger, and in the world of Ronnie and Sammi ... sigh.
Where do we even begin. Like Pauly D, we may kill ourselves if this goes on much longer. So what happened after Sammi's shady texts to Guido MacGyver?
As always, THG breaks down some of the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from the episode in our official, trademarked +/- recap below. Let's get it ON!
OH YEAH, BABY: Ron and Sam are so in love for these 12 seconds.
Let's just get this out of the way early. Ronnie and Sammi stop fighting their feelings for each other. Things are "so different" now. It's been like a week. Minus 9.
All is well, until Arvin, who The Situation terms "a jacked-up Guido MacGyver," tells him Sammi was texting him to meet at the club. THG smells drama. Plus 5.
Ron: "We're finished. I'm done. Have fun with the girls ... I had every chance to bring the f*%king hottest girl in the club home but I didn't because I was crying like a f*%king bitch, over f*%king you!" Sam: "Me too!" Minus 8.
The Snitch-uation definitely started $h!t, but it was warranted. Plus 4.