by Free Britney at . Comments

Taking the MTV phenomenon they've created abroad, the cast members of Jersey Shore certainly didn't waste time getting down to business in Italy.

As the description on our Comcast digital guide put it, "violence," "intensely sexual situations" and "intensely suggestive dialogue" were prevalent.

While the season premiere didn't quite live up to the hype, it did set up a couple of key story arcs and offer plenty of amusing Jersey Shore quotes.

Let's break down the fourth season opener, THG +/- style!

Boning Up

Snooki shows off a pair of I Heart Vinny underwear as she packs. Plus 4.

"No granatos." - Vinny, boning up on his Italian and simultaneously conveying what he will not be boning in Italia. Allegedly. Amazing. Plus 9.

"I'll bring guys home, but I won't do sex." - Deena. Lie. Minus 6.

Uncle Nino said something ... well, it was authentic. Plus 8, because we really hope to see more of this guy. Same goes for Single Ronnie.

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Despite reports of their imminent replacement at the end of the next season's filming, the Jersey Shore cast is not going anywhere just yet.

"I think we're irreplaceable," Paul "DJ Pauly D" DelVecchio said Friday.

At an appearance at the Palms in Vegas, he adds, "I don't think they could replace us. They'd just be people trying to be like us, anyway."

Mr. DelVecchio

On Friday, MTV denied the reports, with a spokesman they have "no plans to recast the show," which recently finished filming Season 4 in Italy.

"It's more of the guys getting into the drama," Pauly said of the gang's adventures in the old country. "We're used to it with the girls, but this season it's a lot of the guys … I think it was as much drama as there was in Miami."

"Yeah, we got ourselves into some serious crap, but somehow we always end up OK. There was some serious stuff going on there."

Season 4 begins August 4. The filming of Jersey Shore Season 5 is underway in Jersey. Will there be another season beyond that?

At least one cast member is game. "I'll do as many Jersey Shore's as we can," Pauly D said, "but I know everything doesn't last forever."

[Photo: WENN.com]

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Rhode Island's most famous DJ and rap's biggest gangsta, together at last.

Pauly D is close to joining forces with G-Unit, 50 Cent's label, as 50 desperately wants to sign the Jersey Shore star and has offered a three-album deal.

In a sign of the apocalypse - but not one you can really get upset about 'cause c'mon, who doesn't love Pauly D - the two sides are nearing a contract.

Paul D

The Jersey Shore pimp/DJ met with Fiddy and his people in NYC last week, where they discussed the lucrative record deal and a Pauly D merchandise line.

Specifically, Pauly D-brand headphones, obviously.

Nothing's signed yet,but according to sources, 50 wants to hammer out the deal ASAP before Pauly jets off to shoot Jersey Shore Season 4 in Italy.

Talks have become so serious, 50 and Pauly have even started to kick around ideas for other artists he and Pauly can collaborate with. Any ideas?

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Charlie Sheen may not have any opening acts with him on tour (sorry, Randy Quaid) but did receive a boost last night from none other than Pauly D.

The Jersey Shore star, upon joining Sheen on stage in Boston, told him, "I wanna be you for one day!" Sheen played along and got the crowd into it.

"Are we happy to see this young man? We told you there would be surprises," he said. "I told you, none of this is planned!" Really, Charlie? Get out.

Pauly D wasted no time plugging his Jersey Shore spinoff, asking Sheen to play wingman: "I got a new show coming up and I want you to be on it."

Sheen replied, "What about just one episode and we'll make it epic!" and Pauly D agreed. "I look forward to it, you're awesome," Sheen told Pauly.

"You're hotter in person!" After Pauly D left, Sheen said, "I don't watch the show... but I can tell he's very popular here. He's a handsome bastard."

Sadly, this was the highlight of an otherwise bad night at Agganis Arena. 

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MTV today announced that the network is set to build upon its smash hit Jersey Shore by giving the green light to TWO spinoffs slated to air in early 2012.

Paul “DJ Pauly D” Delvecchio will get his own series, while Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi and Jenni “JWoww” Farley will team up for the other with 495 Productions.

Both begin production later this year after Jersey Shore Season 4, the filming of which was just pushed back due to permit, contract and scheduling issues.

Whoooooooooa Buddy

AWWWW YEAH! Pauly D's got his own show, yeah.

No one has more swagger, one-liners or more distinctive hair than DJ Pauly D. Set to air for 12-episodes, the as-yet-untitled series follows Pauly D’s jet-setting and often hilarious life on the road as one of the country’s most in-demand DJs.

Aiming to become one of the world’s most successful and recognized names in music, viewers will get to see Pauly D chase his dream, with the help of some the best friends he grew up with in Rhode Island by his side.

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Jersey Shore's third season ended not with a bang, but with a thud. After 13 weeks, we're as exhausted by Sammi and Ronni as the reality stars themselves.

There were many fun, hilarious times in Season 3, but the enduring image will be that of a couple so desperately in love ... and so loathsome of one another.

As always, THG breaks down some of the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes in our official +/- recap below. For the last time until Italy, let's DO THIS:

Ronnie and Sammi Fight Again

Breaking up is hard to do. For you. It's REALLY hard for these idiots.

We pick up where we left off last week. OMG, Ron and Sam are SO in a fight! Did she make out with Arvin? Did she text Arvin to meet up? Do we care? Minus 9.

Arvin: "Sam, we made out before." Sam: "No, we haven't." Arvin: "Yeah, we have." Sam: "No, we haven’t." Plus 4, because is there that much of a gray area?

Is it just us or is Vinny becoming kind of an ass these days? Minus 5.

Whoa, the Snitch-uation apologizes to Sam for meddling. Plus 3.

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Abraham Lincoln famously said that "A house divided against itself cannot stand." Yet a Jersey Shore house divided against itself only stands to be more entertaining.

In this week's installment, friction between Ronnie and Sammi forces peeps to choose sides, while a stalker returns, Deena wears all denim and so much more.

As always, THG breaks down some of the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from the episode in our official, patented +/- recap below. Let's get it ON!

Vinny and Snooki Photo

Comment rendered unnecessary.

Vinny and Snooki grow closer on a lunch date. Cute, but Minus 10 for the profound words emblazoned on her pants, advice guidos often take literally, deeply.

Later, Vinny decides to get his ears pierced at the Shore Store. First it was the spray tan, now this. At least he's going all out in pursuit of Tool-dom. Plus 7.

Pauly D's hookup is thwarted when Erin’s brother shows up. This seems to happen a lot on Jersey Shore. Minus 5, 'cause celebrities are easy to track down.

Deena: "Let’s be real. You didn’t come here for pastries and like, coffee, you came here to do sex with Pauly and Vinny. You embarrassed yourself." Plus 9.

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This week on Jersey Shore, Vinny and Pauly road tripped it to Staten Island, JWoww grew suspicious of Roger, and in the world of Ronnie and Sammi ... sigh.

Where do we even begin. Like Pauly D, we may kill ourselves if this goes on much longer. So what happened after Sammi's shady texts to Guido MacGyver?

As always, THG breaks down some of the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from the episode in our official, trademarked +/- recap below. Let's get it ON!

Mauling Sammi

OH YEAH, BABY: Ron and Sam are so in love for these 12 seconds.

Let's just get this out of the way early. Ronnie and Sammi stop fighting their feelings for each other. Things are "so different" now. It's been like a week. Minus 9.

All is well, until Arvin, who The Situation terms "a jacked-up Guido MacGyver," tells him Sammi was texting him to meet at the club. THG smells drama. Plus 5.

Ron: "We're finished. I'm done. Have fun with the girls ... I had every chance to bring the f*%king hottest girl in the club home but I didn't because I was crying like a f*%king bitch, over f*%king you!" Sam: "Me too!" Minus 8.

The Snitch-uation definitely started $h!t, but it was warranted. Plus 4.

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The Situation got served in the Jersey Shore house's latest prank war, while revealing himself to be an even dirtier human being than previously believed.

Dude's more revolting even than the origin of the toilet clog, which was finally kind of revealed. Elsewhere, Snooki sort of admitted her lovey feelings for Vinny.

Sammi also came back to Seaside Heights. D-d-d-d-done!

As always, THG has broken down some of the top Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from the episode in our trademark +/- recap below. Let's get to it:

I Wanna Cuddle

SO SWEET: Too bad Vinny wasn't game for Snook's arrangement.

Snooki tells Vinny not to bring any girls home from the club so they can cuddle. Minus 5, girl, because you bring plenty of stuff home from the club too.

The first time you see an ex is always awkward. "Hey Sam," Ron said, "You look good." Sammi's reply? "You look pale." That HURTS on this show. Plus 9.

Deena says Sammi’s “hystatic,” which means “super-happy and … really happy.” Minus only 2, because at least she knows it's a made-up word. We think.

Ronnie awkwardly hovers around Sammi at the club. "I don't want to smother you," he said. Sammi then asks, "Are you leaving?" BURN again. Plus 6.

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Pauly D is hoping to find love in Italy, where Jersey Shore is set to film its fourth season, the reality star told Ellen DeGeneres in an interview to air Monday.

Similar to what Pauly told THG last month, he told the talk show host he's "looking for a girl who's funny, that has family values. Someone like yourself."

"Someone I can bring home to my mother. I can bring you home to my mother."

Ellen's reply after pondering that notion: "Yes, you could. You could bring me home to your mother. And I'd just go, 'Hey.' And then I'd leave." She's hilarious.

Despite the pitfalls of finding genuine love while filming a reality show, Pauly hopes "she'll see that I'm a little different. I'm a nice guy and she'll see that in me."

Good luck Pauly. Follow this link for our Jersey Shore recap from last night, and for all the latest on the trip to Italy, check out the latest edition of The Pulse ...