by Hilton Hater at . Comments

There was a time when THG hated Paris Hilton pretty hard.

She was Kim Kardashian before Kim Kardashian was Kim Kardashian, getting rich off her sex tape, her marketing ability and her complete lack of utter talent.

But that feels like forever ago, doesn't it?

Hilton has now been reduced to playing DJ at clubs (instead of headlining their parties as a guest), dressing as Miley Cyrus for Halloween and posing for a series of random bondage photos.

In short, she's become irrelevant - and there's nothing worse for someone who was only really famous for being famous.

Therefore, on Hilton's 33rd birthday, we give the D-lister a break and pay her tribute with 33 photos from a time when people actually cared about what she did. Those were the days, huh, Paris? 

Paris Hilton Mug Shot
Paris Hilton hasn't been famous for a long time. But she hasn't been arrested in years, either!

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Paris Hilton turns 30 years old today and, please folks, wish her a happy birthday.

This washed-up A-lister really needs some support, having sat around over the last couple years and watched Kim Kardashian usurp her title as Least Important Famous Member of Society. It's been rough.

The heiress was forced to throw herself a flapped-themed party in Los Angeles on Tuesday night, as she was joined by boyfriend Cy Waits and a petting zoo at the event. All was taped for her upcoming Oxygen reality show, of course. It's time for a comeback!

Paris Hilton Birthday Party Pic
  • Pathetic Paris
  • Out on Probation
  • Ex-A Lister
  • Supporting the USO

by Free Britney at . Comments

Paris Hilton turns 29 today. While she has never been our favorite celebrity, we have come to respect Paris to a certain degree because she knows what she is:

A rich hotel heiress famous for no reason.

While wannabes like Kim Kardashian mug for the cameras, Tweet constantly and do everything in their power to stay famous, Paris just kinda does her thing.

Since her infamous sex tape in 2003, she has marketed herself ingeniously and even cleaned up her image. The airhead bit may even be (kind of) an act!

Just 1 Night in Paris

Happy birthday, Paris! [Photo: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

She's perfectly content racking up millions in appearance fees and product deals and dropping hints about marriage to beau Doug Reinhardt. Not a bad life.

Click to enlarge some of the Paris Hilton photos we put together as a special birthday tribute, then leave a comment wishing her a happy birthday below!

  • Holiday Spirit
  • Fairies
  • Paris and Pup
  • Hilton Pic
  • Gripping Paris Hilton

Also celebrating birthdays today: NBA legend Michael Jordan, alleged actress Denise Richards, Jessica Simpson's pimp/dad Joe, Jerry O'Connell and more!

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

28.

No, that isn't the number of men Paris Hilton went home with last night, at least not that we know of.

Instead, it's the age our favorite talentless heiress turns today. Hilton threw a party in her own honor last night, inviting friends and family to New York City club Butter.

Looks like she had some trouble getting there, however. It's so hard to find a good driver these days...

Drive!

Past Paris lovers and new Paris friends, such as Stavros Niarchos and Aubrey O'Day, turned out for the event.

Click on the photos below for larger images from the lame party:

  • Niarchos, Out!
  • A Friend of Paris
  • Butter Time!
  • Happy Bday, Paris
  • Sad Paris

[Photos: Splash News]

by Mischalova at . Comments

A pair of useless celebrities celebrated birthdays yesterday.

Paris Hilton turned 27 and partied it up at Pure night club in Las Vegas alongside the Pussycat Dolls over the weekend. She looked more skanked out than usual as she did so.

Also, Denise Richards turned 36. While we wouldn't have had anything negative to say about the ex-wife of Charlie Sheen last month, recent news that she's pimping out her children on an upcoming reality show might actually rank the actress below Hilton now.

When will your favorite star blow out his/her candles? Check out our new celebrity birthdays page now to see!

by Free Britney at . Comments

Paris Hilton's 26th birthday bash wasn't all fun and games.

There was the small matter of Brandon Davis, a.k.a. Greasy Bear, acting like a complete d!ck and offending pretty much everyone in attendance, ultimately forcing his slutty, heiress BFF to kick his oily ass out.

Harlow and Mom

But it was still a rowdy occasion marked by good times and good friends. In the picture below, Paris is joined by lunatic rock goddess Courtney Love, along with the jail-bound Nicole Richie and her new beau, Joel Madden.

It's a fun gang. While posing for this picture, the fearsome foursome couldn't help but let their minds wander a bit, however...

Paris can't get over the fact that people are talking about Kim Kardashian getting busy with Ray J on film when Hilton is the one that wrote the book on riding sex tapes to stardom.

Nicole can't shake thoughts of her impending court date, while Madden is starting to realize how much cuter his ex, Hilary Duff, is than Richie - even if Hilary wasn't exactly Antonella Barba, if you know what we're saying.

Courtney Love? She has no clue where she is, ever. Not shocking.

Paris Hilton Biography

Ho Train On Us Weekly Cover Paris Hilton is a party host, bad actress, singer, model and painfully annoying skank based in Southern California. This former A-list... More »
Born
Birthplace
New York, New York
Full Name
Paris Whitney Hilton

Paris Hilton Quotes

We want to stay together forever. I wouldn't do a Vegas [wedding]. I don't know where or when but I do want it to be romantic.

Paris Hilton [on Benji Madden]

He's my best friend. He's just different from any guy that I've ever been with. I just trust him completely, and I know that he'd be there for me, no matter what.

Paris Hilton [on Benji Madden]
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