Paris Back Together with Stavros; Blames Jealous Nicole for Friendship Fallout
Say this about Paris Hilton: she sucks. Oh, also say this: her actions don't exactly stand by her words.
A few weeks after claiming she was single and loving it, everyone's least favorite hotel heiress human being is back together with her ex-boyfriend, Greek shipping heir Stavros Niarchos â€" at least for now.
Paris Hilton Lookalike Poses in Playboy, Has Our Deepest Sympathies
Hey, fellas, wanna ogle Paris Hilton, but not sure where to find the waste of space? (Hint: Try the bathroom stall, on her knees.) You don't need a blow up doll to satisfy this unusual urge anymore.
Try a lookalike! Natalie Reid (pictured) looks very much like our favorite "fart in a mitten." The real Paris even invited the fake Paris to the real Paris' house for an evening of debating alternative fuel uses in America.
Nicole Richie Inhales Beef Stick, Will Make Up With Paris
The relevance of the headline and picture shown here to the post itself? Zero. But look at her take that thing! So much for those eating disorder rumors!
Lohan Password Stolen, Paris Blamed, Gossip Rags Rejoice
Forget other examples of the Paris Hilton/Lindsay Lohan feud - fake laughing and kicking is NOTHING compared to this.
Brace yourself, readers, because someone has stolen Lohan's Blackberry password! Those in the fiery, spoiled redhead's camp? They blame a certain blonde, skinny, attention/food starved hotel heiress.
Celebrity Blow Up Dolls Include Christina, Paris, J.Lo
Who hasn't wanted to do naughty things to Christina Aguilera or Jennifer Lopez? Come on, ladies, put your hands up, too.
This is everyone's chance to make such fantasies into a reality. Sort of. Not really. For the sickos, maybe.
A Special Interview with a Distraught Paris Hilton
Yesterday, TMZ.com had the good fortune - or awful, awful fortune - of sitting down with Paris Hilton and discussing a few of the posts fans haters have left for her on that website.
Harvey Levin had the dishonor of such an assignment. Before we get into the heartfelt phony responses from Hilton, let's look over some of the feelings users have expressed about this hideous human being, those that Paris refers to as "mean and sadistic" and The Gossip refers to as "hilarious and spot-on":
Grossly Skinny Paris Hilton Trashes Skinny People
If she keeps this up, the competition for Most Annoying will be a runaway victory for a certain hotel heiress. So will Most Pot-Like (as in, one calling kettles black). Fresh off laughing in the face of one rival, Paris Hilton is lashing out at another.
The emaciated waste of space recently trashed the assortment of underweight stars of Hollywood, most likely as yet another attack on former best friend, Nicole Ritchie. "A lot of women are too thin. But I like food too much," Hilton said, with a straight face somehow. "I think the ones who are getting really skinny look gross."
Paris, Lindsay Square Off in Malibu; Reports of Mutual Mauling, Sadly False
Some reunions are civil and mature - thank you, Nick and Jessica.
Others, meanwhile, are hilarious and spiteful - who else but you, Paris and Lindsay?
Paris Hilton Talks About Her Favorite Subject: Herself
Here's a natural chain of well-known beauties: Marilyn Monroe. Princess Di. Paris Hilton.
Referring to herself as the "iconic blonde" of this decade, none other than Paris herself made the above comparison in a recent interview with the Sunday Times of London. Would you expect anything less from the pampered pet lover?
Stars are Blind: Take Two!
Thank goodness. One music video for Paris Hilton's first-ever single isn't nearly enough.
Evidently, not everyone is satisfied with the first cut of Hilton's music video for "Stars Are Blind." Some, of course, are not satifised with the existence of Paris in the first place.
It's a Pampered, Spoiled, Nauseating Simple Life - Again
Here's a question to ponder: if a show stars a spec of an actress so tiny, it takes NASA telescopes to see her, does it actually exist? Viewers will have a chance to play "Find Nicole!" next year, as the horrific news of another The Simple Life season is spreading.
Apparently, ratings trump common decency and bad blood, as E! announced it will bring Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie back for a fifth season of this mean-spirited show.