Yesterday, had the good fortune - or awful, awful fortune - of sitting down with Paris Hilton and discussing a few of the posts fans haters have left for her on that website.

Harvey Levin had the dishonor of such an assignment. Before we get into the heartfelt phony responses from Hilton, let's look over some of the feelings users have expressed about this hideous human being, those that Paris refers to as "mean and sadistic" and The Gossip refers to as "hilarious and spot-on":

Posted in: Paris Hilton

If she keeps this up, the competition for Most Annoying will be a runaway victory for a certain hotel heiress. So will Most Pot-Like (as in, one calling kettles black). Fresh off laughing in the face of one rival, Paris Hilton is lashing out at another.

The emaciated waste of space recently trashed the assortment of underweight stars of Hollywood, most likely as yet another attack on former best friend, Nicole Ritchie. "A lot of women are too thin. But I like food too much," Hilton said, with a straight face somehow. "I think the ones who are getting really skinny look gross."

Posted in: Paris Hilton

Here's a natural chain of well-known beauties: Marilyn Monroe. Princess Di. Paris Hilton.

Referring to herself as the "iconic blonde" of this decade, none other than Paris herself made the above comparison in a recent interview with the Sunday Times of London. Would you expect anything less from the pampered pet lover?

Posted in: Paris Hilton

Here's a question to ponder: if a show stars a spec of an actress so tiny, it takes NASA telescopes to see her, does it actually exist? Viewers will have a chance to play "Find Nicole!" next year, as the horrific news of another The Simple Life season is spreading.

Apparently, ratings trump common decency and bad blood, as E! announced it will bring Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie back for a fifth season of this mean-spirited show.

Posted in: Nicole Richie

Paris Hilton says she'd make a great mother because she's very good with animals. As if to prove her point - and cause Captain Kangaroo to turn in his grave - the nitwit purchased a parrot and kitten from Bird Kingdom & Pet Shop in Santa Monica this week.

Hilton, of course, made her chihuahua famous during seasons of The Simple Life; although many viewers had difficulty telling the tiny dog apart from Nicole Richie.

Posted in: Paris Hilton

Paris Hilton, meet Heather Mills. Animals everywhere are already grateful for this acquaintance.

Sources claim that Hilton - who has been known to wear fur in the past - became alarmed after watching a gruesome PETA video at the home of Paul McCartney ex, lewd wife. The footage showed dogs being skinned alive for their fur. Mills told Hilton that going the "fake fur route wasn't foolproof, because some high-end department stores labeled certain garments "artificial fur" when in fact they were the real deal. Say it ain't so!

Posted in: Paris Hilton

Paris Hilton Biography

Ho Train On Us Weekly Cover
Paris Hilton is a party host, bad actress, singer, model and painfully annoying skank based in Southern California. This former A-list... More »
New York, New York
Full Name
Paris Whitney Hilton

Paris Hilton Quotes

We want to stay together forever. I wouldn't do a Vegas [wedding]. I don't know where or when but I do want it to be romantic.

Paris Hilton [on Benji Madden]

He's my best friend. He's just different from any guy that I've ever been with. I just trust him completely, and I know that he'd be there for me, no matter what.

Paris Hilton [on Benji Madden]