Tale of the Talentless: K-Fed Takes on Paris Hilton
Let's review what we've learned about Paris Hilton this week:
Overrated? Paris Hilton? That's crazy. Just ask Paris Hilton herself.
When asked about her debut album and about people hearing it for the first time, Hilton was honest as always.
Paris Hilton, overrated?
That's almost as shocking as Kristen Cavallari and Brody Jenner breaking up.
What's a slutty hotel heiress to do in order to celebrate her awful debut CD other than throw herself a party? So was the thinking of Paris Hilton, seen here cutting up the dance floor in South Beach.
Joining the tone deaf blonde are sister Nicky and the creator of the term, "Firecrotch," Brandon Davis. Those unfamiliar with this moniker just need to look at the hair color of Lindsay Lohan.
You know, continue to earn money for waving at people and sleep with every guy on two feet.
So recommends the music critic for the London Guardian, after listening to the debut album from Paris Hilton.
You know, for someone who's giving up sex for a year, Paris Hilton is hanging out with the individual that may know more about knocking boots thann anyone else on the planet.
Yes, folks, that is Jenna Jameson alongside the HO-tel heiress. Leave a comment now and let us know how many men you think each one bedded during this evening out ...
Just when you thought a feud between Paris Hilton and her dog would overtake the heiress' rivalry with Lindsay Lohan, Hilton's posse was seen lashing out at everyone least favorite red head.
It's a good thing Paris Hilton is making friends with a certain famous kitty - because he dog frickin hates her!
We don't know if she was bribed by Nicole Richie, Lindsay Lohan, or simply expressing the sentiments shared by human beings around the universe, but Hilton's pet kinkajou, Baby Luv, bit Paris on the arm early Tuesday morning.
Someone is gonna feel sorry for Lindsay Lohan dammit! She doesn't care what she has to do to draw it out of people.
You don't care that she almost witnessed a paparazzi accident? Almost, people! What about the fact that she was downright exhausted?
So, let us get this straight:
In Austria, they pay Paris Hilton $1 million to show up and wave at a crowd?
Don't worry, Gossip-ites, we've got the news you've been waiting for: yes, Paris Hilton did indeed make more money than Jennifer Lopez last year.
Why the blonde piece of human excrement was comparing herself to J-Lo, we have no idea. But apparently felt she need to set the financial record straight between herself and Marc Anthony's wife.