by Mischalova at . Comments

Paris Hilton issued a statement yesterday saying she won't file an appeal and intends to serve out the remainder of her jail sentence.

"Being in jail is by far the hardest thing I have ever done," she said. "During the past several days, I have had a lot of time to think and I believe that I am learning and growing from this experience."

James Blunt, of course, was hurt by this statement. He had been under the impression that he was the hardest thing Paris had ever done.

Hilton said she has spent time reading her fan mail and that "I very much appreciate all of their good wishes and hope they will keep their letters coming."

Reportedly, Paris also loves her family, almost as much as Paul Sculfor used to love cocaine.

Hilton concluded by saying she was "shocked" at the attention her case has received by the media and public officials.

"I would hope going forward that the public and the media will focus on more important things like the men and women serving our country in Iraq and other places around the world," she said.

While we certainly agree with the lawbreaking heiress, we can't help but think she'd be singing a different, attention-loving tune if she weren't behind bars. This is a woman that loves to dominate celebrity gossip headlines.

The heiress issued the statement after she spent her first night alone in a room in a locked-down medical ward after suffering in jail.

Meanwhile, a family friend says Paris' wail of "It's not right!" after her re-sentencing on Friday was not a sign that she disagreed with the decision.

"She was taken by surprise when she was restrained from hugging her mom and dad," the friend tells People magazine. "That's all she wanted to do â€" give them a hug. She was startled and spontaneously yelled. Wouldn't most people? But she was not protesting. Just surprised and frightened."

Well, not exactly. Most people not named Jason Wahler wouldn't get into this sort of trouble in the first place.

Hilton then was sent to the Twin Towers Correctional Facility's Correctional Treatment Center in the adjacent medical building. She was placed in a 120-square-foot room by herself with guards at the door at all times.

"Her cell has a bed, toilet, sink, and a sliver of a window," says sheriff's spokesman Steve Whitmore.

Sounds like worse digs than the ones Justin Timberlake recently used against Britney Spears.

by Mischalova at . Comments

It's the best news since we heard that a nude Amanda Beard would be posing in Playboy:

Paris Hilton is going back to jail.

Judge Michael Sauer made a perfectly logical point, saying "I don't know why the defendant couldn't be treated at Lynwood, because they have a great medical facility."

And with that, he sentenced the illegal driver to return to prison in order to serve out the remainder of her time there. Looks like Nicole Richie can go back to being scared again now. She may be next!

TMZ states that Hilton left the courtoom in tears, screaming, "Mom, Mom, Mom."

Moreover, one witness described the scene as Paris being "physically escorted" out of the courtroom by a female deputy. And it's safe to assume this isn't the sort of physical escorting that Hilton is used to, courtesy of Stavros Niarchos and many, many others.

Hilton's awful mother was later seen pacing the hallways, telling reporters, "I'm paralyzed right now." We're sure she can grab a drink with Dina Lohan at the World's Worst Parenting bar and feel better, though.

by Mischalova at . Comments

Katherine Heigl is in the news these days for starring on a hit show and contributing to hilarious Knocked Up quotes from this summer's funniest movie.

Paris Hilton is in the news these days for being a spoiled former jailbird that got released from prison because the system caters to those with money.

A Trashy Shopper

In other words: These two stars are a tad different from one another.

But not always. As you can see below, each seems to go for the same celebrity fashion look from time to time.

We assume Heigl has no interest in resembling Hilton in any way, but she may have been too distracted by the recent Isaiah Washington mess to think much about her wardrobe. That's okay, though.

We're sure Seth Rogen would still do her.

Paris, meanwhile, sucks more than Antonella Barba. But she also has other things to worry about aside from wearing the same outfit as a fellow celeb.

After all, she's totally mentally unstable, remember?

by Mischalova at . Comments

Seeing actual Jayden James photos? Shocking.

Learning that Paris Hilton doesn't have a real medical disorder? Not remotely surprising.

Supernatural Skank

TMZ has learned that the condition that enabled Hilton to be released very early from prison was purely psychological - and it was diagnosed by a psychiatrist that has invented mental problems for the heiress in the past.

Indeed, Charles Sophy visited Hilton in jail each of the last two days. We're told after Sophy's visit yesterday, word was passed to the sheriff that Hilton's mental state was more fragile than the brittle bones of friend Nicole Richie.

So it bears repeating: The reason for releasing Paris Hilton from jail had nothing to do with any physical issue. It was purely in her head.

But, wait, there's more absurdity! Last month, on the eve of a trial in which Hilton was accused of slandering socialite Zeta Graph, Dr. Sophy told the judge that Hilton was "emotionally distraught and traumatized" over her jail sentence, which prevented her from participating in a meaningful defense.

That trial was put on hold until August, just enough time to Sophy's checks from the Hiltons to clear, we're sure.

This guy is shadier than Spencer Pratt and Ray J put together.

by Mischalova at . Comments

Hey, Nicole Richie, don't be afraid of jail.

All you need to do is whine as much as your reality show cohort Paris Hilton and you'll be set free. It's as simple as 1-2-woe-is-me.

Dirtiness

In a pathetic display of giving in to the rich and spoiled, the L.A. County Sheriff's Department has released Paris from jail after a whole three days behind bars. Spokesperson Steve Whitmore claimed Hilton was released due to medical reasons he cannot disclose.

Funny. We didn't know "money" was deemed a "medical reason." We also didn't know Victoria Beckham could be named Woman of the Year. Guess nothing should come as a surprise at this point.

Hilton has been fitted for an ankle bracelet and placed under house arrest in her West Hollywood home for 40 days. After this time is up, Whitmore says she will have "fulfilled her debt to society." 

The Hollywood Gossip doesn't think this is possible until she drowns in a pool of raw sewage, however. Either that, or she's forced to stand in front of an onslaught of Blake Fielder-Civil snot rockets for the duration of her house arrest.

The justice system should be more ashamed of itself than Alex Rodriguez should be for cheating on his wife.

by Mischalova at . Comments

Paris Hilton's pussy isn't alone in feeling scared. Reportedly, its owner can now relate.

TMZ has multiple inside sources who have painted a bleak picture of Paris' second day in the slammer. Simply put, they say the promiscuous lawbreaker is very afraid.

The celebrity gossip sources say Hilton has been crying on the phone, whining about not sleeping or eating. Paris says her cell is "freezing cold." She has three little blankets and no pillow. Moreover, the room is bright and jail noise echoes through her space.

Sleep isn't the only problem. There is also no Stavros Niarchos to have sex with. Oh, and Paris says she has no appetite and has eaten almost nothing.

Somewhere - probably from underneath Joel Madden - close friend Nicole Richie is proud of this development.

TMZ also reports that inmates actually struck up a chant when Paris went back to her cell yesterday. As she walked by they struck up a chorus, "Paris! Paris! Paris!" We're told she smiled and waved.

Some inmates have reportedly been coming up to her cell door, mostly to say hi.

One inmate said, "You don't deserve to be here." Another made an origami butterfly from a magazine page and slipped it under her door. Another slipped a drawing book under her door.

Shemar Moore can only hope fellow criminals are as nice to him if he's sentenced to the slammer.

Meanwhile, Paris still has a full three weeks left on her prison stay. By the time she gets out, Esmee Denters may be a bigger name than she is.

by Free Britney at . Comments

This Photo Finish was too easy. They're BFFs. They both starred on the reality TV hit, The Simple Life. They're both exponentially overhyped and marginally talented. At best.

And they've both posed for sexy mug shots in the recent past.

All celebrity mug shots are appreciated by our celebrity gossip staffers, but these two are personal favorites. Here are the booking photos of Paris Hilton (left), and Nicole Richie...

Which celebrity mug shot is more hottttttt?

  • Paris Hilton Mug Shot
  • Nicole Richie Mug Shot

As for the incarcerated Hilton, we're obliged to update you on her status in the slammer. Supposedly, she was the cause of a small riot after got "hazed" in the shower by a couple of inmates who let her have it after she dropped the soap.

Just kidding! All is well for Paris Hilton in jail. A day or so into her 23-day term, officials are calling her a "model citizen" - gracious, thankful and polite to staff.

She's wearing a short-sleeved, orange jumpsuit. She still has on the makeup she was wearing when she turned herself in. Her hair is down. Extensions on inmates' hair, normally not allowed, are okay in her case because they're "tightly wound." In case you were wondering.

She's not interacting with any of the inmates, at least not yet, but she's seeing them through glass. She's not happy, but resigned to doing time and getting it over with. She's not scared, and she's not teary-eyed. Just quiet and reserved.

As for her cell - it's 12x8 feet, with a bunk bed, a toilet and wash basin. There are windows - a little one in the door, and one on the wall that overlooks buildings.

Yeah, if there's one thing we learned from Office Space, it's that minimum security prison is no picnic. But we think the HO-tel heiress can stomach 21 more days.

by Free Britney at . Comments
Paris Hilton Mug ShotBreak out your party hats. It's official.

Paris Hilton turned herself in to authorities Sunday night and is behind bars.

The HO-tel heiress' surrender did not take place at the jail where she's doing time.

Paris' attorney, Richard Hutton, picked her up at her parents' house at 10:30 last night.

Paris Hilton, Hutton, her mom Kathy Hilton and her sister Nicky Hilton drove to the Men's Central Jail in downtown Los Angeles (below, left).

The men's facility, commonly referred to as the Twin Towers, is where Paris turned herself in to begin her 23-day jail sentence.

The Sheriff devised the plan of Paris turning herself in miles away from the actual site where she'll be doing time because the crush of paparazzi at the jail created a safety hazard.

Paris was then driven to the Lynwood Correctional Facility in Lynwood, Calif. (below, right) where inmates waited to ridicule her she is now serving her sentence.

Earlier last night, Hilton left home for the MTV Music Awards. After appearing on the red carpet, Hilton went to her folks' house for a brief time, then left to face the music.

TMZ reports that the prison's plans for Paris have changed. She'll be held in solitary confinement almost exclusively, meaning all hopes of a prison-style remake of the Paris Hilton sex tape are pretty much dashed.

Although there has been a pre-screened woman designated as her cell mate, for the time being, Hilton will be in solitary 23 hours a day. The hour that she's out, she's not really out.

Paris Hilton will be allowed to shower, use a phone and watch TV in a small pod adjacent to her cell. No Paris Hilton pussy will be on display. Sorry people.

Hutton released a statement to TMZ from Paris Hilton:

"I am ready to face the consequences of violating probation. During the past few weeks, I have had a lot of time to think and have come to realize I made some mistakes."

"This is an important point in my life and I need to take responsibility for my actions. In the future, I plan on taking more of an active role in the decisions I make. I want to thank my family, friends and fans for their continued support. Although I am scared, I am ready to begin my jail sentence."

Well spoken, Paris. Hopefully, Lindsay Lohan and/or Nicole Richie will join you behind bars any day now. At least then you'd both have some company!

by Mischalova at . Comments

We wonder what Rumer Willis has to say about this.

The perennial party-goer would probably be in favor of the fact that Paris Hilton is hitting the town as often as she can before jail time begins.

On Saturday afternoon, the heiress briefly emerged from her Hollywood Hills home to an awaiting mob of photographers camped outside. And we're sure she loved it.

Wearing a yellow sunhat and tropical-print sundress (pictured here) with her hair in pigtails, Hilton was chauffeured by a black stretch limo Escalade to a nearby Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf, ordered an iced latte, then promptly returned home; and was most likely thrilled to discover that Joslyn Noel Morse nude photos were taking attention away from her impending prison sentence.

"She looked gorgeous and seemed in high spirits," said an onlooker. "She was smiling and playing coy with the paparazzi."

On Friday, Hilton â€" who has until Tuesday to begin serving a minimum of 23 days for violating probation â€" was spotted at Hollywood hot spot Les Deux.

Clad in a skin-colored chiffon dress, Hilton showed up around 11:45 p.m. with a sizable entourage that included her sister Nicky Hilton and Nicky's boyfriend David Katzenberg.

On Thursday, the sisters hit an L.A. party at the Regent Beverly Wilshire Hotel, where Hilton was seen "laughing and living it up," an eyewitness told People magazine. Afterward, the siblings made a brief appearance at a pre-MTV party at a Beverly Hills mansion.

Meanwhile, the press has been ignoring the news that Tonya Cooley gets naked on film and instead has begun staking out the Century Regional Detention Facility in Lynwood, Calif., where Hilton is to do her time.

However Sheriff Lee Baca, whose department oversees the jail, told the Los Angeles Times on Saturday that authorities will not allow Hilton to "be seen in handcuffs ... or in the back of a police car, forlorn and in handcuffs."

"Jails are not circuses and not places where 'fun' is the priority," Baca said. "Jail should be a corrective learning experience."

Perhaps Pete Doherty should actually be sent to one in that case.

by Mischalova at . Comments

Paris Hilton's pussy must be looking forward to the day his owner goes into the slammer. Freedom shall finally be his.

Reportedly, however, this won't take place until the poor kitten is used as a prop to garner sympathy for his law-breaking owner.

Evidently, Paris Hilton has ordered stylists to show up at her Hollywood Hills home at 9:00 AM the day of her imprisonment. The plan is to pull a Naomi Campbell and show up to jail as photo-ready as possible. The inmate should love that.

Moreover, while Paris serving time, a source says that she'll be penning a diary, which "will make a more dramatic read than Martha Stewart's."

But will it sell for more than the Hilton sex tape did?

Finally, as for the big arrival, an "insider" says Hilton may use her new kitten as a prop, handing it over to Nicky Hilton, tears streaming (violins playing, flashes popping, etc.), for maximum effect. Seriously. This is actually the plan.

Speaking of Hilton's sister, she thinks the entire ordeal is just crazy.

"I think she should definitely be punished, but going to jail for a traffic violation is pretty absurd," Hilton said.

But it's in this spoiled skank's nature to remain positive, a friend says. Maybe that's what Stavros Niarchos keeps seeing in her.

"She's the eternal optimist," the pal reported. "She's been through so much, but that's always her disposition."

It's true. Paris has been through so, so much. There was Stavros, Josh Henderson, James Blunt, Matt Leinart...

Paris Hilton Biography

Ho Train On Us Weekly Cover Paris Hilton is a party host, bad actress, singer, model and painfully annoying skank based in Southern California. This former A-list... More »
Born
Birthplace
New York, New York
Full Name
Paris Whitney Hilton

Paris Hilton Quotes

We want to stay together forever. I wouldn't do a Vegas [wedding]. I don't know where or when but I do want it to be romantic.

Paris Hilton [on Benji Madden]

He's my best friend. He's just different from any guy that I've ever been with. I just trust him completely, and I know that he'd be there for me, no matter what.

Paris Hilton [on Benji Madden]
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