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A disturbing, shameless, yet kind of hilarious new tabloid report claims the infamous 1994 O.J. Simpson murders were actually caught on video.

Yes, the National Enquirer claims it has video from O.J.'s ALLEGED (totally real) slayings of ex-wife Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman.

O.J. Simpson, Murderer?

On the one hand, the Enquirer reached a new low with this one.

On the other hand ... admit it, you kinda wanna read this, right?

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Florida serial killer Glen Rogers, who is currently on death row, raised eyebrows this week by allegedly confessing to murdering Nicole Brown and Ron Goldman in 1994.

Nicole and Ron being O.J. Simpson's ex-wife and her friend, of course.

O.J. Mug Shot

Rogers claims in his "confession" that O.J. Simpson paid him to break into Nicole's home and steal $20,000 in jewelry, with authorization to kill her if necessary.

The claim is the subject of a new Discovery Channel documentary on the killings airing this week. Ron's dad Fred Goldman isn't buying it for one second, saying:

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O.J. Simpson never threw away the knife he used to kill his ex-wife and her friend and is now looking to sell the weapon for millions, a tabloid claims.

O.J. Mug Shot

The disgraced NFL great, now jailed for kidnapping and robbery, is reportedly trying to profit from his 1994 double murder, the National Enquirer reports.

"O.J. wants the deal to be secret,” a source says. “He’s looking for a cash deal so the money can be deposited in offshore accounts and can’t be traced directly to him.”

Where to even begin with this ...

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Brian "Kato" Kaelin, O.J. Simpson's former friend, apparently just said the Juice "definitely" killed Nicole Brown and Ron Goldman, which we already all know.

Kato's disclosure is still surprising given that Kato is the only person known to be with O.J. around the time of the murders he beat the rap for in June 1994.

Kato went to McDonald's with O.J. and was living in his guest house. Prosecutors say he heard O.J. outside coming back from the killings that fateful night.

  • Kato Kaelin Photo
  • O.J. Mug Shot

During the trial, Kaelin feigned ignorance, but tells the N.Y. Post today: "Yes, he did it." He didn't say so then because, "I was too scared. I was terrified.”

Kato says that he can now come clean because statute of limitations has passed and he can't be charged with perjury based on his original testimony.

He says it's been a long 18 years doing ... whatever it is he does. “People hated me. I’ve been spat upon. They threw gum in my coffee," he recalls.

Simpson was eventually acquitted of murder, but was found liable for their deaths in civil court. He is now doing hard time for kidnapping and robbery.

He is also rumored to be Khloe Kardashian's father ... which he's not. But her father, Robert Kardashian Sr., was his trusted lawyer and confidant.

UPDATE: Kato Kaelin shockingly now tells TMZ that he never said ANY of those things to reporter New York Post reporter Cindy Adams or anyone else.

Kato says he has expressed his opinion over the years that he THINKS O.J. killed Nicole and Ron, but he insists, "I have no first hand knowledge."

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O.J. Simpson believes Khloe Kardashian is his daughter and plans on changing his will to reflect this fact.

According to a new story in The National Enquirer, that is.

The same tabloid that first floated the Kardashian-belongs-to-O.J. rumor in January is now fueling that seemingly absurd allegation by claiming Simpson wants to "do the right thing" and leave a sizable chunk of his estate to the reality star.

Moreover, he wants to do it at older daughter Arnelle's expense, an anonymous insider claims, because Simpsons thinks she has squandered his money on a lavish, drunken lifestyle.

Khloe Kardashian on the Red Carpet

Currently sitting in a prison cell, convicted of armed robbery and kidnapping, O.J. has stashed away a couple million in the Cayman Islands and can expect more over the years due to his NFL pension, which pays him an annual sum of $300,000.

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O.J. Simpson is almost definitely not the father of Khloe Kardashian.

But if you listen to the quotes invented by a source The National Enquirer made up in its controversial new cover story, you may begin to have some doubts. Simply put:

"O.J. told me Khloe's his child," this anonymous insider tells the tabloid. "It was the big secret that no one in the two families would discuss. And Robert admitted he and Kris were not having sex at the time Khloe was conceived. O.J. bragged about his sex life and many female conquests, which he said included some of his best friends' wives."

  • Khloe Kardashian in Vegas
  • It's The Juice!

It is true that Kris Jenner was friends with the accused murder, via her husband at the time, but their relationship was never the same after Nicole Brown Simpson was found dead in 1994. It's unclear why.

Adds this totally real source:

"He used to tell us way back - even before he and Nicole got divorced - that he had a love child with the wife of a wealthy family. But at the time of Khloe's birth, it would have been devastating for the news to come out that America's biggest sports hero had fathered a love child."

It's true. Thank goodness O.J. has kept his reputation intact since this time.

The Juice is currently in jail on an armed robbery conviction and is eligible for parole in 2017. We may need to wait until then for a definitive answer to the question of paternity.

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A-ha! The puzzle has been solved. The National Enquirer has discovered he identity of Khloe Kardashian's father, and the answer is a killer:

O.J. Simpson!

Following the ridiculous, unproven rumor that Khloe is the product of an affair between Kris Jenner and a mystery man, this tabloid has now published an equally ridiculous and unproven rumor: that the former Buffalo Bills running back and likely murderer was that man.

National Equirer Cover Story

Scandalous! Khloe looks JUST like O.J.'s daughter, Sydney!!!

The cover story should actually come as good news to the family. It's given Kim Kardashian a chance to prove she's not a robot, as she actually made us laugh with the following Tweet in response to this report:

"It makes sense now. Khloe u are so tan!"

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F. Lee Bailey helped O.J. Simpson beat the rap for murder. Now he's trying to help clear his name in the court of public opinion for some reason.

Evidence of O.J.'s innocence was held back in the 1995 trial in which he was acquitted in the murder of his ex-wife and her friend, Bailey says.

O.J. Simpson Mug Shot III

In new legal papers, Bailey tells of four people who could have bolstered Simpson's case but never testified, while offering a trial overview.

WE WON! Simpson flanked by Bailey, left, and Johnnie Cochran in 1995.

Simpson was found not guilty. Most Americans are convinced he is guilty, Bailey said, but his documents may persuade some doubters that he is innocent.

ROTFL.

Bailey wrote the documents, called "The Simpson Verdict," as a proposal for a book that never materialized. He published them on his website Sunday.

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Christie Prody, Fred Goldman and anyone with a conscience can rest easy after O.J. Simpson lost his appeal of a kidnapping and robbery conviction today.

Juice recruited some lowlife thugs, instructed them to "get some heat", a la Stringer Bell, and jacked a memorabilia dealer to reclaim "his" stuff in 2008.

The Nevada Supreme Court upheld the ruling in the case, stating that none of O.J.'s complaints had merit, and that he should continue doing time.

O.J. appealed on grounds of racial bias, saying prosecutors axed African-American jurors unfairly, and didn't allow his attorneys to ask certain questions.

Specifically, about the two people he killed in 1994.

The former Heisman winner and NFL Hall of Fame member was sentenced to 33 years in prison, with a possibility for parole on good behavior after nine.

Interestingly, one of Simpson's cohorts, Clarence Stewart, is also appealing, arguing that Simpson's involvement unfairly prejudiced a jury against him.

No idea how that would possibly happen ...

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O.J. Simpson says his conviction for robbery and kidnapping was totally flawed because black jurors were wrongly excluded and the judge was prejudiced.

Really.

O.J. Simpson Mug Shot III

Addressing a three-justice panel of the Nevada Supreme Court, his attorney Yale Galanter, said O.J.'s guilty verdict should be overturned for said reasons.

Simpson, who was acquitted after allegedly killing his ex-wife and her friend in 1995, was sentenced to 15 years in prison for the 2007 kidnapping/robbery.

Galanter said a litany of flaws called the outcome of the 2008 case into question, however, saying the judge served as a de facto prosecutor against O.J.

"I don't think this trial was handled in a fair and impartial manner," Galanter said of Judge Jackie Glass, who he believes was biased towards the Juice.

Worst. Appeal. Ever.

Galanter cited an argument with the judge where, he discovered later, a bailiff was standing behind him during the exchange, handcuffs at the ready.

"I had no idea that was happening. But the mental picture that creates for jurors is devastating for a lawyer trying to have credibility," Galanter said.

Also devastating? O.J. when he's in a bad mood. Right, Christie Prody?

Prosecutors also wrongly excluded the only two African-Americans in the jury pool strictly because they might empathize with the defense, he added.

"Their speculation on what these African-American jurors may have done had no place in this court room," he added, saying it "smacked of prejudice."

"It was improper, it was not right," he said. Same could be said of slitting your ex's throat or hiring thugs to rob a memorabilia dealer, but no matter.

State prosecutors denied the two jurors had been unfairly excluded. The court will rule on the appeal of O.J. Simpson 's conviction at a later date.

O.J. Simpson Biography

O.J. Mugshot O.J. Simpson is a former Heisman Trophy winner, NFL Hall of Famer and murderer hailing from San Francisco, California. The football star... More »
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O.J. Simpson
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