Jersey Shore Recap: Wall 1, Situation 0!
Ronnie and Mike's epic throwdown on Jersey Shore picked up last night in a special Sunday episode before the Video Music Awards. So who won the big fight?
We're gonna say the wall by TKO.
In typical Jersey Shore fashion, the events had to be seen to be believed, and the fallout was uglier than the altercation itself. Never a dull moment ...
As always, we've recapped all the top Jersey Shore quotes and moments for you. Let's break last night's episode, "And The Wall Won," THG +/- style!
Not wasting any time, we pick up right where we left off, and the violence ensued when Ron's pent-up anger toward Mike could not be contained. Well, Sitch's head got rammed into the wall ... by Sitch. Seriously. Minus 20.
There's no attempting to explain that one. Vinny, Pauly D, Jenni and Snooki look on half-worried, but mostly just disgusted or stunned. It's hard to say. Plus 5.
Security eventually breaks it up. Plus 4 for saving Sitch and all, but Minus 4 because since when do they intervene when cast members beats on themselves?
Snooki: The Next Kim Kardashian?
Is Jersey Shore star Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi the next Kim Kardashian? Does anyone even know what we mean by that? Probably not on both counts.
We're not suggesting that Snook is about to be smushed by Ray J on film, though that'd be a heck of a story, or that she's in Kim's fame league.
But she's a moneymaking fame machine in and of herself, and as far as most of humankind is concerned, for seemingly no reason. Sound familiar?
Peas in a pod. A useless pod.
If the pint-size Jersey Shore guidette stays on track, she may be able to do it. She revealed to E! all the things she has going on (excerpts below) ...
On Dancing With the Stars: They're saying I'm holding out for money ... I never got asked to even do the show, so I don't know where that's coming from. I'd do it, but probably not right now because I'm so busy with everything going on.
Jersey Shore Recap: LET'S DO IT!!!!!
Antics such as Deena's bi-curious robbery are almost par for the course on Jersey Shore. The kind of pent-up rage we saw last night, however? Off the chain!
It was one of the most-hyped events of the entire fourth season, and the culmination of the rage between Ronnie and Mike actually lived up to expectations.
Somewhat disturbingly, but it lived up to it.
As always, we've recapped all the top Jersey Shore quotes and moments for you. Let's break last night's episode, "Crime and Punishment," THG +/- style!
Comcast episode description: "Ronnie and Sammi return to their old ways." Shiver. Minus 6. Special episode airing Sunday night before the VMAs? Plus 10!
Snooki shut off communication with Mike, saying their "bridge is burned," then took Ron's advice and told Jionni. We think they're good ... for now. Plus 4.
Vinny told the guys that Deena c*ck-blocked him, but that's not entirely true, as Erica didn't really smush Deena and ended up in Vin's bed later, so Minus 5.
There's a difference between a "tag-team" and a "tag-rob." Who knew. Plus 3.
Snooki, Jionni LaValle Hold Court in Las Vegas
Jersey Shore wreck Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi was joined by boyfriend Jionni LaValle at Wet Republic in Las Vegas this weekend. The fist-pumping guidette was paid a $#!t-ton of money to host a party and dress like an utter moron at the venue.
See below. There are no words.
[Photos: WENN.com]
Jersey Shore Recap: Let's Get Bi-Curious!
Is Deena Nicole Cortese actually bisexual, or just putting on a show for MTV cameras? Unclear. Did she just pull a robbery on Sitch and Vinny? Quite clear!
That was not a Jersey Shore plot line we saw coming. The exposing of Sitch and Snook's smush session and the Ron-Sam reconciliation, however, felt inevitable.
As always, we've recapped all the top Jersey Shore quotes and moments for you below. Let's break last night's episode, "Twinning," THG +/- style!
Snooki wants to grab a glass of wine with Ron before GTL. Lush. Minus 4.
He plans to have "the conversation" with Sam soon, he says. We're already feeling a bit scared, emotionally drained, and excited for the fireworks. Plus 5.
Snook feels Luigi's "weiner" at the gym. He nods and laughs, since he doesn't understand. Or maybe he does, which would be even funnier. Plus 3.
Deena is gettin' some Lean Cuisine. NOTE: Not the frozen dinner. Minus 2.
Snooki: Even More of a Drunk Thanks to Italy
Effing Snooki.
The Jersey Shore star may have vowed to quit drinking during the day after eating sand last summer, but when she got to Italy, that went out the window.
When in Rome, right?
The country was an enabler for Nicole Polizzi and her fellow cast members while filming season four, she says, citing the European culture as a reason:
"I loved Italy because you go out at 11 a.m. and everyone would be drinking wine. So I wouldn't feel guilty for being like, 'Pinot Grigio, please!'"
Right, because she'd feel so guilty in the U.S.
"We drank every single night. It was crazy," she adds. "But you can't walk in high heels on the friggin' cobblestones! So just picture us drunk, leaving the club, in these heels. It's not a good time. It was horrible!"
Sounds it.
Snooki: NOT Going Dancing With the Stars
Some rumors are just too good to be true.
The latest on the Dancing With the Stars front was that Jersey Shore star Snooki would be trading her furry boots for ballroom attire and fight for the Mirror Ball.
A source close to the reality star, however, says she has no plans to follow in The Situation's footsteps, saying: "It's 100 percent false ... She's not doing it!"
Sadly, Snooki will only be on one show this fall.
Reps for ABC never comment on casting rumors, but this is one of the first times we can recall TMZ, which reported Snooki's casting, getting it wrong.
The lineup for DWTS Season 13 will be revealed on August 29 during an episode of Bachelor Pad with a two-hour premiere set for September 19.
Queen Latifah and Tiffani Thiessen were also rumored to be joining the cast in the same report that suggested Snooki. Stay tuned on those fronts.
Snooki, Queen Latifah and Tiffani Thiessen: Cast on Dancing With the Stars!
We recently reported about how Dancing With the Stars producers are under pressure from ABC to cast actual celebrities and fewer D-listers such as Bristol Palin, Kate Gosselin and The Situation. Well, today they landed ...
Effing Snooki.
Break out the furry boots and trucker hats (and Bruno's "1" paddle). Supposedly, the cast can pick its own costumes this fall. Our vote is for this:
We already know watching Snooki fall down face first is entertaining, and she is a pretty big name these days (even if you hate the reason why).
Queen Latifah and White Collar star Tiffani Thiessen are also on board, as well, giving the show more celebrities to balance out Rob Kardashian.
Dancing With the Stars is actively courting NBA players, given their lockout sitch, although it's unclear if any ballers have signed on as of yet.
Shawn Marion of the world champion Mavericks turned down DWTS this month. The season begins in September after Bachelor Pad concludes.
Thoughts on these new additions?
Jersey Shore Recap: I'm the Pimp Daddy Mac of This Whole Place!
Single Ronnie made a return to Jersey Shore last night, while Pauly and Deena channeled Season 3 Snooki and Vinny with their potential, awkward "romance."
As for Season 4 Snooki, she was having issues with Jionni, and guess who was there to help her through them? This Situation? Not a good situation.
The second episode of the season offered plenty of amusing Jersey Shore quotes, as always, but the major drama of the summer is still to come.
Let's break down the second episode of the summer, THG +/- style!
Minus 5 for the immediate continuation of the "romantic" scene with Pauly and Deena that was in our heads for days after the Season 4 premiere.
Ronnie is on the phone with a girl. Not named Sam. Or his mom! Her name's Hannah, and she's been "helping him get through some stuff." Stuff, he says ... It has a name, you know. A nickname, even: S-W-E-E-T-H-E-A-R-T. Plus 7.
Deena takes a spill as they return home. So predictable. Minus 4.
Pauly totes pretends to be passed out so he doesn't have to hit it or be forced to express overtly that he doesn't wish to hit it. Classic move. Plus 8.
Snooki With Blue Eyes: Kind of Creepy!
Snooki of Jersey Shore fame stepped out last night with blue eyes, a big change from her usual dark brown. If it weren't for the fact that she remains a 4' orange oompa loompa-like being, we might not have recognized her!
The reality star also known as Nicole Polizzi tweeted that she thought she looked like "a vampire" with the new contacts in. It's true, we could see her on The Vampire Diaries (provided she gets devoured by a werewolf in short order).
What do you think of the look? Vote on her best eye color below:
