by Free Britney at

They're no Miley Cyrus and Selena Gomez, but Kelly Osbourne and Snooki made red carpet appearances at the Grammy Awards last night themselves.

What do you think of the E! celebrity fashion critic's own ensemble? How does that compare with the orange Jersey Shore star and her gigantic poof?

Kylie Jenner Fashion

Vote for your favorite style star below ...

Fashion Face-Off!

Who looked better at the Grammys, Kelly Osbourne or Snooki? View Poll »

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by Free Britney at

This week's Jersey Shore marked the departure of Sammi "Sweetheart" Giancola. A permanent exist, we think - and hope - after the fight to end all fights.

As much as we aren't sorry to see her go, we'll give her this much - she went out in style after a blowout with Ronnie Magro that exceeded even their standards.

This comprised most of the memorable Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from the episode, as we've broken down, as always, in our trademark +/- recap below:

Sammi in Bed!

BOILING POINT: Ron wants Sam's stuff out of here ... with her on top of it.

Ronnie confronts The Situation for violating guy code. Funny how, like Sammi pointing the finger at JWoww and Snooki, they always blame others. Minus 2.

Able to see the big picture (take note, Ron), Sitch "takes the high road" and apologize to ensure it doesn't end in a brawl. Plus 6 for his surprising maturity.

He hits the boardwalk to cool off, unaware that Sammi is also heading there with Deena, who "loves single Sammi!" Who loves anything Sammi!? Minus 4.

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by Free Britney at

Nicole Polizzi is not known for her discerning tastes. Sexually, she'll get with almost anyone/thing. Last night on Jersey Shore, JWoww gave Snooki a "boner."

To that end, at the Washington Auto Show this week, Snook was asked if President Barack Obama or predecessor George W. Bush was cuter. Her response:

"I thought George Bush was pretty cute... for an old man."

NICOLE DIGS BUSH: Funny, Snooki normally prefers juiceheads over airheads.

Too bad Dubya's married. These two might actually work as a couple. Both oppose Obama's tanning tax, and neither one of them can balance a checkbook.

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by Free Britney at

Snooki met a new juicehead, Pauly D made amends with his stalker, Ronnie bled out of a major orifice and broke up with Sam, again, on last night's Jersey Shore.

Perhaps most notable, though, was Snooki's marine biology expertise. Thanks to Nicole Polizzi, we now know why the ocean is salty. Nasty whale sperm, obvi.

This and many other memorable Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night are broken down by THG, as always, in our trademark +/- recap below:

Special Exam

SPECIAL EXAM: This is what it's like for viewers watching Sammi onscreen.

Things are good in the Jersey Shore house. It's just the calm before the storm, but there's actually no drama or active feud as the episode commences! Plus 8.

But, as Ronnie put it after a night of drinking ended with him puking like a madman as usual, it's always "one step forward and two step backs." Minus 5.

We've seen people on Jersey Shore getting probed a lot, but never like this. Plus 4.

Despite assurances that "I've dranken a lot more than I drank tonight," Ron's arse swells to the point that we're treated to the haunting visual above. Minus 11.

Snooki fell asleep with the dogs. A more apt scenario may never transpire. Plus 7.

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by Free Britney at

Snooki is piling up a pretty long list of Jersey Shore regrets.

We've already seen her get so hammered she stumbled around asking "where's the f*%king beach" when the OCEAN was right behind her. That's bad.

The latest do-over she wishes she had is simpler and somewhat less embarrassing. Given a second chance, she wouldn't have let Vinny "get it in."

Vinny and Snooki Pic

Snooki and Vinny Guadagnino in Miami.

"I kind of wish me and Vinny didn't try and have sex, because it was just drama this whole season," she said Thursday on Sirius radio's Morning Mash Up.

The fallout lasted until the current season. "I don't know, it was just very awkward between us. I felt stupid because, you'll see, it's just embarrassing."

Vinny, she guessed, might also wish it had never happened.

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by Free Britney at

The gang invented a new means of extracting grenades, Deena revealed her inner freak, Sammi and Ronnie came to blows (again), Snooki bought a stripper pole and so much more in an epic night of Jersey Shore debauchery.

Just when you think they can't outdo themselves once again ...

THG breaks down all the best Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's installment of the MTV show, as always, in its trademark +/- recap below:

Grenade Whistle!

SOUND THE ALARM: Vinny rescues The Situation.

It's more like a Grenade Horn, but the Grenade Whistle is a fitting prop for a group of guys so dedicated to extracting the less-attractive females. Plus 8.

Of course, they could simply not bring said females back home, so ... Minus 7.

Vinny sounds the grenade whistle to rescue Sitch. What are friends for? Plus 4.

The Situation goes upstairs to borrow a condom from Ronnie and lets it slip to Sammi that Ronnie is talking to JWoww. What an instigator. Minus 6.

Snooki and Jenni bring home a couple of bitches. Pomeranians, looks like. Plus 5.

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by Free Britney at

In case you missed it, Nicole Polizzi and Jenni Farley are getting a spinoff series. One that will show just how unintelligent the Jersey Shore stars are.

Snooki and JWoww will confront new challenges on the new show, as we told you yesterday. But we didn't realize the true extent of those challenges.

Snooki's Pregnant!

Writing checks, for example. Snook has never actually done this.

Despite the amount of money she's made in the last year, not to mention surviving 23 years on this planet, Nicole has never once written a check.

In Snooki and JWoww Vs. The World - the actual working title - the terrible tandem will exploit the hell out of their embarrassing ignorance ... natch.

One of the big scenes takes place inside of a Jersey bank, when Snooki's dad tries to teach her how to balance a checkbook. It's an adventure.

The rundown explains, "She gets a crash course in balancing her checkbook ... but adding and subtracting from the ledger proves too much for her."

Somehow that's not terrible hard to imagine. She also the banker, "Do you have any blinged out checks?" Ratings gold, people. Ratings. Gold.

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by Free Britney at

Snooki and JWoww, a.k.a. Nicole Polizzi and Jenni Farley, will be facing some serious life challenges on their upcoming Jersey Shore spinoff pilot.

The question is ... are they up for them?

Effin Snooki

Mortgages, career decisions, toilet paper ... this is a reality show about coming of age. And coming on to hot guys while showing major cleave.

The "story line" for the new show, which is separate from Jersey Shore season four: Snooki moves in with JWoww, but cannot deal with real-life problems.

When they set out to buy a $1.5 million pad, for instance, they don't know what a mortgage is ... or how to write a check for that matter. They're not smart.

Eh, maybe we should cut 'em some slack, since they supposedly get distracted by a "hot mortgage broker." There's a contradiction in terms for you.

Conflict also erupts, according to a script obtained by TMZ, because Snooki "made a mess of the bathroom and didn't change the toilet paper."

She also "ate a ton of JWoww's food." Is there any way this won't be a hit?!

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by Free Britney at

Snooki and JWoww are, like, total BFFs, as last night's Jersey Shore proved. They're so tight, MTV wants them to film a spinoff pilot - this weekend!

The pilot episode will be shot in Long Island over the weekend. There's no special hook to the potential new show, it's just JWoww and Snooki solo.

Sort of like the Kardashians and their 19 spinoffs. It's a bit odd that MTV even wants a pilot. They sort of know what to expect from JWooki, no?

Snooki, Jenni

GRUESOME TWOSOME: Is MTV spinning off JWoww and Snooki?

This would be the second proposed spinoff of Jersey Shore, which is reportedly airing a fourth season as well. A Pauly D spinoff has already begun filming.

No word yet what Jenni and Nicole will be doing in the pilot, but we would bet a fair amount that there will be a lot of bronzer, boobs and buff dudes. Sweet.

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by Free Britney at

Last night on Jersey Shore, Snooki got sprung from the can but soon reverted to her old ways, while Ronnie's doppelganger was discovered at the club and JWoww's relationship problems with Tom Lippolis reached a tipping point.

A relatively tame episode after Snooki's epic bender, but a good one.

As always, THG breaks down all the best Jersey Shore quotes and scenes from last night's installment of the MTV show in its trademark +/- recap below:

Lecture From Dad

WHAT A QUACK: Snooki's dad relays his disappointment.

He's disappointed, but Snooki's dad takes the whole thing pretty well. Guess when your daughter once sold alcohol at a party at your house, and a trashed guest crashed his car and died on the way home, you've seen worse. Minus 12.

When her father goes off on her with the tried and true "I'm not mad, just disappointed" bit, she says "It's not like I killed someone." This time. Plus 8.

His lecture was a real deterrent for at least 12 hours. Minus 4.

Wait, was JWoww wearing a "Free Snooki" tank top? Plus 7.

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