by Free Britney at

The Hollywood Gossip staff is proud to bring you Tale of the Tape, in which we break down prospective matchups within the celebrity gossip world.

The following battle is one involving two notorious celebrity moms we are really sick of, yet can't get enough of. We know. It's a strange relationship.

With twenty-two kids between them and many more celebrity news headlines than that, Nadya Suleman and Kate Gosselin have become tabloid staples renowned for both their scandalous personal lives and remarkably prolific vaginas.

THG NOTE: Kate's private area has pumped out many children, as well! THG NOTE: That was a "Jon Gosselin is a vagina" joke. Is this thing on? Oh forget it.

Anyway, pitted against each other, which of these celebrity moms will emerge victorious in a grueling, 10-round battle? Let's find out. Ding, ding!

Which ever-present celebrity mom will reign supreme?

1. NUMBER OF OFFSPRING ...

Kate Gosselin: 8
Nadya Suleman: 14
Edge: Octomom

2. REALITY TV STATUS

Kate Gosselin: Jon and Kate Plus 8 entering fifth season
Nadya Suleman: Coming soon!
Edge: Kate

3. BEST NICKNAME

Kate Gosselin: Grating, raging b!tch
Nadya Suleman: Octomom
Edge: Octomom

4. FATHER OF HER KIDS IS ...

Kate Gosselin: A d-bag
Nadya Suleman: Unknown
Edge: Tie

5. CHEATED ...

Kate Gosselin: With Steve Neild
Nadya Suleman: California taxpayers
Edge: Tie

Continue Reading...

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by Free Britney at

Nadya Suleman is not too proud to accept handouts.

In fact, the fertile one is all for it. She's accepted donations for her newborns, sold family photos, applied for food stamps, enlisted free nannies she later fired for being spies and sponged off taxpayers in countless other ways.

Octomom From Behind

But she's drawing the line at plastic surgery. But only because she doesn't feel she needs it - otherwise, what's another $20,000 for the public to pick up?

"I would never even accept a tummy tuck even if it were offered because I don't need it," Octomom nobly told Radar Online. "I'm actually shocked myself at my own body ... my goal is to do things as naturally as possible."

Except for being artificially inseminated with 14 frickin' kids, that is.

Although Octomom says she's had "absolutely no time to do anything yet," she is convinced that she'll eventually get back into top shape on her own.

"I would like to join a gym," she says without explanation of how she would pay for the membership (or a nanny to watch her kids) on her $0 salary.

"My friends nicknamed me 'Rubberband' because after every [child] I had, I was back to a size 2 in a month. Now, it's three months, and I'm not a 2 yet. I'm a 5 or 6, but I'll get there. I like to be small because I have extraordinary energy."

Wait ... Nadya Suleman has friends?

While she has no plans to go under the knife, Suleman did add without irony that she is feeling compelled to provide for her children.

"What's going on now is that I feel obligated - almost compelled - to earn a living to take care of my kids," she says.

By whoring them out on a reality show, natch.

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by Free Britney at

Nadya Suleman opens up her mouth to Radar Online almost as prolifically as she opens her ... forget it. Anyway, in her latest interview, Octomom says that she was kind of exaggerating last week and can totally still have more kids.

You'd think that someone who has cranked out 14 humans would have a firm grasp of her reproductive system, so when she claimed she was undergoing surgery to remove half her uterus, thus rendering her infertile, we believed her.

Nadya and Kid

And were overjoyed.

But Nadya Suleman is now setting the record straight, saying she overstated the scope of the surgery, which would, in fact, make her more fertile than ever.

"I'm not having half my uterus removed," she said. "That may have been an exaggeration on my part. It's called a myomectomy, they're removing the fibroids and part of the uterus and actually it enhances fertility, it doesn't reduce it."

Someone kill us now.

Fortunately, Octomom added that while she could get pregnant again if she desired, "I would never." La Habra, Calif., taxpayers just collectively exhaled.

As for how the mother of 14 spent yesterday's special holiday?

"Today on Mother's Day, I feel like it's Thanksgiving," she said. "I'm just incredibly thankful for what I have and feel like all my children are blessed."

We can only hope that we, too, are one day blessed with such wonderful bundles of joy. Although we can do without the pregnant Octomom pics.

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by Free Britney at

Taxpayers in La Habra and across California can finally breathe a sigh of relief. Well, not really. The state is still pretty much screwed financially.

But at least Octomom won't be having a 15th frickin' kid!

Nadya Suleman is planning to check into the hospital this weekend to have benign fibroid tumors removed from her uterus, she told Radar Online.

With a nearly half of the reproductive organ missing, future pregnancies will be nearly impossible for the woman who had eight kids in January.

The infamous mother of 14 will be leaving her kids in the care of nannies (funded by taxpayers, of course) throughout the week-long recovery.

"I'm terrified," the 33-year-old nut job told the online publication regarding the procedure. "I have to get a will done just in case, so that's really scary."

No comment.

Octomom did not reveal who would be named as godparents to the children in the event of a tragedy, but says she has a good, Christian family in mind.

Wonder if the Prejeans even believe in artificial insemination ...

On a random side note, Octo also added that she is considering changing one of the octuplets' names to Nevaeh, which is "Heaven" spelled backwards.

Sigh.

She may be a drain on society for decades to come, but at least the human clown car has produced its last. Click to enlarge more Nadya Suleman pics ...

  • Vagina = Clown Car
  • Crazy Octomom
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by Free Britney at

Yesterday afternoon, human rights advocate and lawyer Gloria Allred filed a petition to appoint a guardian for the eight infant children of Nadya Suleman.

The goal of the child labor lawsuit is to ensure they are financially represented.

You Da Mom!

"In the case of the octuplets, rather than choosing to provide her children with a normal life, their mother has chosen instead to commercially exploit them," Allred said in a statement on behalf of Paul Peterson, a child labor advocate.

"The Guardian will assure that the childrens' compensation is fair and that their money is segregated and supervised. In other words, professional management will help to safeguard the babies' separate interests and rights."

A hearing is set for June 22, although Gloria Allred said they are open to dropping it if Suleman, a.k.a. Octomom, agrees to help appoint a guardian.

Suleman, whose attorney said the octuplets are "incidental" to her ability to attain income, has issued a response to the lawsuit, telling Radar Online:

"I feel like as though many, many, many, many people in this society are trying to distract me from taking care of my babies," said the drain on society.

"I'm gonna continue to live in my baby bubble with my kids. And whoever wants a piece of me or the babies, keep on trying. That's all I have to say."

You heard her, Social Services. Please, keep trying.

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by Free Britney at

Nadya Suleman, a.k.a. Octomom, is being sued. That's not surprising. Nor is it shocking that mega-mouthpiece lawyer Gloria Allred is representing them.

The high-powered blowhard is letting everyone know she has been hired in the secret case against Nadya Suleman, but she wouldn't reveal who or why.

That is, not until she held a giant press conference to assure the maximum amount of attention when giving away all the juicy details, of course.

All Gloria Allred said going into the Monday morning media circus was that she is doing this "in an attempt to protect Nadya Suleman's children."

It turns out the petition was filed on behalf of Paul Peterson, a former child actor and an active, outspoken child labor advocate for decades.

Vagina = Clown Car

Gloria Allred is helping Paul Peterson, a former child star and known child labor advocate, take on the human clown car in a new lawsuit. Ding, ding!

Peterson, a former Mickey Mouse Club star, has been instrumental in passing several laws designed to protect children in the entertainment industry.

Concerns about the octuplets and the circus outside and inside Suleman's home have arisen since the octuplets came home and Octomom inked a reality show deal.

"This action we have taken by filing the petition in the Superior Court today is in the best interests of the babies," said Octo-nemesis Gloria Allred.

"There are laws, regulations and guidelines for even the youngest child employed in the entertainment business in California," Peterson added.

"The income of children employed in the entertainment industry is their own; 10 percent of the money must be saved until the age of majority. I want a guardian appointed for the estate of the octuplets to protect their earnings."

Nadya Suleman's attorney, Jeff Czech, calls the octuplets "incidental" to her ability to attain income from media and entertainment.

What a world.

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by Free Britney at

Octomom Nadya Suleman has been confronted by social services, cops, lawyers the media and countless critics for her antics of the past several months.

While some instant celebrities like Carrie Prejean are polarizing figures, there's simply no debate when it comes to Octomom: she's America's Most Hated.

Octomom on the Horn

Even her own mom is getting in on the action.

"How did this happen?" Angela Suleman demanded of her daughter, holding up the front page of the local newspaper featuring an article on local social services and cops visiting Nadya's house, in a video captured by Radar Online.

On Wednesday, the La Habra Police Department and Social Services of Orange County stopped by the Octo-residence to investigate a claim of neglect.

Nadya Suleman's son Kaleb, 3 - she has six kids in addition to the octuplets born in January - showed up at school with bite marks, raising red flags.

The mother-daughter - who have had a contentious relationship - bickered back and forth outside her house with Nadya cutting her off, yelling "I'm talking!"

"This is stupid," the drain on society said. "Social workers even said, 'This has been a false allegation, but thank you for being so open and transparent.'"

"My child got bitten by my two-year-old," Nadya said.

Back on tape, Octomom ranted: "CPS is on my side. Nothing happened to Kaleb. He got bitten by Aidan. He has meltdowns, he slams his face on the ground. Especially when one is autistic, they will slam themselves."

What a mess. Follow the link for Radar's video of the affair.

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by Free Britney at

A man failing to take responsibility for a child he helped bring into this world may be the most disgraceful, cowardly act imaginable.

But if there were ever a situation where you could understand the dad going AWOL, it would be one in which the baby mama is Nadya Suleman.

Octomom and 1 Kid

The infamous Octomom - who just added eight more babies to her brood of six young kids - says their dad is the same, unidentified sperm donor.

Luis Ceballos apparently isn't buying it.

In an interview with In Touch magazine, Luis, calling himself Nadya's ex-boyfriend, says he thinks he fathered her eldest son, 7-year-old Elijah.

"I want to get a DNA test on that first kid," he said, manning up.

Who can blame Luis Ceballos for hitting this, 14 kids ago?

Luis and Nadya Suleman were allegedly tight when he worked as her driver during the time she worked the pole at the San Diego club Spearmint Rhino (she denies that she worked there and is threatening to sue over such claims).

Luis, who'd gone years without kissing and telling, says he banged Octomom in the back of his limo, and didn't use protection. Sorry for that imagery.

"Right around the time she stopped stripping and disappeared, I found out she was pregnant," he said. "That is why I think the kid is mine."

We admire your honestly, Luis, we really do. But we also feel sorry for you and won't hold it against you if you flee the U.S. and never come back.

Then again, Orange County social services would probably welcome freeing at least one of the Octo 14 from the clutches of America's Most Hated.

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by Free Britney at

Oksana Grigorieva made headlines earlier this week by going public with the recently-separated Mel Gibson. Oh, and those lingerie pics were pretty cool too.

Nadya Suleman made headlines in January by cranking eight artificially-inseminated humans out of her vagina. That's eight more children than she has jobs.

Octomom Bikini Pic

Besides names that start with O, and a propensity for making celebrity gossip news headlines, do these two ladies have a slight resemblance in common?

One of our readers suggested as much, so let's put it to the test.

What do you think? Do Oksana Grigorieva and the attention-seeking loon who has birthed 14 humans look at all alike? You be the judge in the poll below?

Do you see an Oksana Grigorieva / Nadya Suleman resemblance?

 

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by Free Britney at

Somehow we doubt this will be a one-time thing.

Embattled mother of newborn octuplets and six other young children Nadya Suleman was visited Wednesday by Orange County Social Services and police detectives.

Whack Job

According to the L.A. Times, a complaint was filed by one of Suleman's kids' school teachers after the teacher observed what appeared to be bite marks on him.

The bitten offspring is three-year old Aidan.

The website also claimed Aidan showed up to school with a black eye, but Nadya Suleman downplayed his injury, saying: “He’s autistic, he bumps into things.”

La Habra Police Lt. Tom Dutton confirmed the visit in a statement:

“On Wednesday, April 29, La Habra Police personnel were requested to assist Orange County Social Services involving a matter pertaining to the Sulemans. As is customary, the department routinely assists other agencies, when so requested.”

DRAIN ON SOCIETY: Another day, another child endangerment claim for Octomom.

Suleman's attorney, Jeff Czech, said he was not sure whether the social services officials took any action and suspects they were called by the boy's teacher.

The caretaker of 14 - and possibly a new pet soon - had no comment.

This incident is already the fourth formal complaint levied against Nadya Suleman, 34, for possible child neglect and endangerment this year.

The first three complaints filed against Octomom took place in March by attorney Gloria Allred on behalf of the organization Angels in Waiting.

Allred took action after Nadya Suleman fired the non-profit organization's nurses, said she didn't need their help and accused them of being spies.

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