by Free Britney at . Comments

Lindsay Lohan needs help. Michael Lohan is not wrong there.

His motives, however? Highly suspect. Mike decided the best way to reach out to her was to address the public ... in a live press conference. Only Michael Lohan.

Dressed in a suit in his attorney’s NYC office, Lohan blamed the people in Lindsay’s inner circle for enabling her partying and alleged prescription drug addiction.

He fears Lindsay Lohan is going to die unless she gets help, and immediately.

“The people around her know Lindsay is not okay,” Michael said. “I get calls from her closest friends when they’re out with her during the night. I don’t want her to be a statistic. The press is already writing obits for her. How sick is that?”

Pretty sick, dude. As is your conduct.

  • Begging For it
  • In Need of Serious Help

He begged not to be judged for reaching out this way. Too late. “Extraordinary circumstances call for extraordinary measures,” Michael Lohan claims.

“I’ve tried every way possible to reach out to my daughter. I have called, texted ... in difficult times she reaches out to me for help. Last week she called me when she fell into the cactus. She said ‘Daddy, I need security.’ This is not about publicity."

That may be the quote of the year so far.

Michael says he plans to return to Los Angeles to sit down with Lindsay and convince her to go to rehab. For now, he has a message for you sponges:

“If you’re an enabler, get the hell out of the way,” he said. “If Lindsay won’t sit down privately, my attorneys and I will take other measures. I just hope Lindsay is accommodating. Lindsay needs a private setting where she can detox."

The nonsensical one added: "I’m sick and tired of the nonsense.”

Follow the jump for a video of Michael Lohan's press conference:

Continue Reading...

by Free Britney at . Comments

Michael Lohan was scheduled to have a heart procedure yesterday after having a heart attack. But hope was not lost. His his spirits were lifted by a text of support.

That text was sent from none other than Lindsay Lohan.

M-Lo was rushed to the hospital in New York last week with what is believed to have been a mild heart attack, and underwent an angioplasty procedure Wednesday.

Who knew he even had a heart? Sorry. Stents were also being placed as surgeons try to unblock his coronary arteries (similar to the surgery Bill Clinton had done).

Speaking from his hospital bed with Radar Online (don't we all), Lohan said: “The surgeons are hoping this will work but if it does not I may have to get a bypass."

We sort of wish he had bypassed this news story right now.

F-ck Off

Is Michael Lohan cooking up tall tales about a text from Lindsay? If she did send one, this photo of her may be more along the lines of the message she conveyed.

While blaming his previous career as a stock broker for the stress, as well as the recent court drama with ex-fiancee Erin Muller, he did have some positive news.

“I got a text message from Lindsay which read: ‘OMG. Hope you are okay’ and my other kids have all been in contact with me too," says the Father of the Decade.

“My girlfriend, Kate Major, slept here with me overnight and my spirits have been definitely lifted by the overwhelming support from both my family and friends."

"I’ve been through a lot in my life, been to jail, court cases, even drove my Ferrari over a cliff once, so, it’s going to take a lot more than this to finish me off!"

Sure thing, Mike. You just let Radar know how it goes, okay?

by Free Britney at . Comments

Perennial Father of the Year candidate Michael Lohan was taken to a Massachusetts hospital after a medical scare last night, but he was later released.

The reason for his trip there is somewhat unclear.

Lohan experienced chest pains s he was preparing for a celebrity boxing match. He was examined by doctors, but didn't stay the night and was let go.

His girlfriend, Kate Major (yup, former Jon Gosselin play thing) says wants to be checked out by a cardiologist later this week back home in New York.

Who knew Michael Lohan even HAD a heart? Snap! Sorry, that was low.

Major says the father of Lindsay Lohan has been very conscious of his health, watching what he eats and exercising, but has had heart attacks before.

In all seriousness, we hope he recovers fully and swiftly.

As a result of the incident, Lohan was replaced in his celebrity boxing bout last night, and the replacement won against Todd Poulton, whoever that is.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Just when you thought you'd heard everything, Michael Lohan and girlfriend Kate Major are moving from New York to Los Angeles together. There's more too:

Lohan says he is hoping to get some of his "celebrity" pals to join him and participate in different charity fundraisers (i.e. PR opportunities) along the way.

M-Lo explains: “We’re calling the show Crossing Borders because not only will we be crossing physical borders state to state, but moral borders as well." 

Deep.

Michael Lohan and Kate Major

Two people who definitely need their own show.

"While each celebrity offers something different, each city will bring something new and different. Each celebrity sees him/herself as a good person. Viewers will see that we all try our best, but sometimes cross the borders of right and wrong."

This guy ought to teach philosophy.

No word on when:

  • Lindsay Lohan will file the paperwork seeking a preemptive restraining order in anticipation of her deadbeat dad moving to the same city.
  • Kate Major will discuss Jon Gosselin's penis size.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Michael Lohan has more legal troubles than ... well, Lindsay Lohan! Seriously, dude violates restraining orders like it's his job. Which is... who the heck knows.

The absurdity? To violate a restraining order, someone has to first obtain one against you. Then you have to shun it so obviously that they call the cops again.

Such is life for Michael Lohan, who's making this an old habit at this point. M-Lo was arrested again after another incident involving his ex girlfriend Erin Muller.

Once again, the phone was his undoing.

Michael Lohan Mug Shot

Michael Lohan poses for a familiar photographer.

According to Erin's attorney Bryan Konoski, Lindsay's father allegedly called Erin at work on January 21, a violation of Erin's restraining order against him.

Nassau County (N.Y.) police say Michael, who is dating Kate Major now for some reason, was arrested Thursday night and booked for criminal contempt.

This isn't an old story - he was arrested in December for the same thing. He was also accused of booting Erin in the vagina, which is seriously uncool.

The dirtbag is due in court on February 25.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Erin Muller will not face charges for allegedly kicking her ex Michael Lohan in the head. This just weeks after she has accused him of kicking her in the va-jay-jay.

Mike and his ex clearly had a very healthy relationship.

A judge declared that Michael had it coming the misdemeanor charge has been dismissed. Michael claimed he was assaulted by Erin Muller on November 14.

The father of Lindsay Lohan claimed he tried to stop Erin from driving because she was too "drunk and high" and that's when she allegedly kicked his dome.

Erin Muller and Michael Lohan in less violent times.

A judge in New York's Nassau County Court dismissed the criminal case against Erin this morning, though. Michael's restraining order against Erin was unaffected.

Erin recently filed papers claiming she's the real victim, accusing Michael of abusing her over a dozen times in 2007-2008, including a kick to her lady region.

Michael has denied her allegations.

Then again, this is a guy who records all his phone calls, and also fake-Tweeted a suicide note to get attention, so you really can't take his word at face value.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Just so everyone's clear on the progression of events here:

  • Michael Lohan has a bro-mance with Jon Gosselin, who he offers to "rep" for appearances on The Insider, and secretly records all phone calls with.
  • Michael plays matchmaker, introducing Jon to Kate Major, a reporter for Star.
  • Kate quits her job to be with the newly-single Jon, who quickly dumps her.
  • Michael and Kate both testify against Jon in TLC's lawsuit against him.
  • Michael Lohan and Kate Major get matching tattoos and begin dating!
Michael Lohan and Kate Major

An inevitable couple made in fame whoring heaven.

If you're baffled as to how anyone could date Michael Lohan, we're with you. Although this girl quit her job to be with freaking Jon Gosselin. This is kind of a lateral move.

According to Radar Online, the two left no doubt they're a couple during an excursion on Long Island. You can read the article here if you're interested in the gory details.

We suggest you wear a cup, Kate. We're just saying.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Nothing Michael Lohan does comes without the obligatory "well, that's weird" or "what a d!ck" reactions. This would certainly fit into the former category.

While Jon Gosselin battles with one of his ex-girlfriends, Hailey Glassman, another former fling, Kate Major, seems to be getting pretty close to Michael.

Lindsay's dad and Jon's rebound piece have been hanging out recently, and the duo recently got similar tattoos to commemorate ... well, who knows.

"I got a tattoo for the new year. Kate liked it so she got one too. It was not a big deal," Lohan, out on bail after harassing ex-fiancee Erin Muller, said.

Kate Major, Jon Gosselin

Michael Lohan and Kate Major with their mutual d-bag friend.

Michael Lohan and Jon Gosselin were very friendly in mid-2009, and it was Mike who introduced her Kate Major, a former reporter for Star magazine.

While Michael denies being romantically involved with Kate, reports say they spent the holidays in Chicago and once even shared a hotel room in NYC.

That's one way to get back at Jon ... for what, we have absolutely no idea. But you know M-Lo doesn't do anything without a clear agenda in mind.

Dude wrote a fake-suicide Tweet. Just saying.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Michael Lohan is livid over a new rumor surrounding him.

How he can even keep them all straight, with all the shady things he does and is accused of, we don't know. But this one is particularly offensive to him.

His ex-girlfriend, Erin Muller, alleges in legal documents filed this week that Michael was abusive quite a lot, and once even kicked her in the vagina.

She also detailed several other instances of verbal and physical abuse over a span of a year or so. Dude treated her like garbage 24-7, essentially.

M-Lo says these allegations are "patently untrue."

Mike and Erin in pre-vadge-punting times.

Michael’s lawyer says Erin Muller made everything up after he "terminated" their engagement. Yes, she at one point agreed to marry Michael Lohan.

His legal team also says her story is “a desperate attempt to dismiss the allegations against her.” Michael has been suing his ex for harassment.

Erin first made the claims in documents filed yesterday in New York as she was attempting to get Michael’s harassment suit against her dropped.

She also has an active restraining order out against Michael, which the father of Lindsay Lohan violated and was recently thrown in jail for.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Erin Muller, who once agreed to marry Michael Lohan for some reason, now wants nothing to do with him. Better late than never on that realization.

Part of the reason? She says he physically abused her at least 12 times over the last two years, including once when he "kicked [her] in the vagina."

Erin, who already has a restraining order against Mike (which he violated and ended up in jail for), filed court documents in Nassau County, N.Y., yesterday, asking the court to drop Michael's recent harassment allegations against her.

In doing so, Erin Muller said Michael Lohan abused her in ...

December 2007: Michael Lohan "slapped Erin in the face twice because Erin accused him of giving her a fake watch on her birthday." The nerve.

February 2008: Michael "punched Erin in the mouth" because she had a male friend on Facebook. Well, she should really know better, right?

Erin Muller says Michael Lohan is abusive.

March 2008: Michael "whipped a computer cord" at her face but she blocked it with her hand ... causing a laceration. Good reflexes, though, Erin.

May 2008: Michael "kicked Erin Muller in the ribs."

May 2008: Michael "kicked Erin Muller in the vagina, bruising it and causing substantial pain." Okay, this is really not funny and is just depressing.

June 2008: Perhaps worst of all, Michael allegedly "spit in Erin's face and then beat her repeatedly with his fist." Then he "yelled at her to 'stop crying c*nt - other people will see you - and if they see you, I will kill you!'"

This guy needs to get locked up for a long, long time. Maybe Adam Senn really is good for Lindsay ... compared to this maniac, how can he not be?

Michael Lohan Biography

Lohan, Michael It's a close race between Michael Lohan and Jon Gosselin for the world's worst celebrity father. In terms of making the argument for... More »
Full Name
Michael Lohan

Michael Lohan Quotes

Just like the [topless] Marilyn Monroe spread, Linds is my daughter and there are just some things a father doesn't want to see or hear, regardless of whether they are true or false.

Michael Lohan [on daughter dating Samanta Ronson]

Michael Lohan: Maybe her mother's life revolves around the tabloids and reports, but mine doesn't. I am into setting a good example and doing good things that don't deceive or exploit my kids. But I will say this: While we were a family, you never even saw or heard a negative thing about any of us.

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