by Nosy Neighbor at

Leave it to The Real Housewives of New Jersey to turn a "Horse Whisper to a Scream." 

Read on as we break down who among the women embraced their vulnerable side and who ended up looking like a horse's a$$ in THG's official +/- recap!

Not the Horse Whisperer

Jersey is still in the house at the Mirval Resort and Spa and it may never be the same again.

But psychic advisors and gong therapy aren't what Melissa envisioned for her birthday.  "I'm done. I want a f**king cocktail by the pool in a bikini." Plus 15. No one can say she's not a girl who knows what she want.

Everyone's still recovering from the ghost whisperer when they all head out to see a horse whisperer.  Funny thing is, Wyatt the equine therapist reads these Jersey housewives and their hubbies like the comic book characters they are. Plus 22.

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by Nosy Neighbor at

The Real Housewives of New Jersey head to Arizona with their "Spaghetti Western & Meatballs" indulge in not one…but two cleansing rituals.

Check out all of the dirt in THG's official +/- review.

Go Ahead, Touch It.

Teresa Guidice is riding high. Everything's going well. Cook books, Milania Haircare. Criminal charges…oops. She conveniently forgot that one. Minus 15.

But you know something's wrong when your 12 year old has to edit your fashion sense.

Shouldn't it be the mom putting a ban on skimpy bathing suits, not the other way around?

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by Hilton Hater at

Melissa Gorga is on the move. Literally.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey star and her husband Joe have finalized the sale of their mansion in Montville Township, receiving their asking price of $3.8 million for a property that includes six bedrooms and seven bathrooms.

The couple and its kids are on the way to Franklin Lakes now, where they plan to build their dream home and rent a house in the meantime.

Melissa Gorga and Joe Gorga

"I feel like this was meant to be. It happened just in time for the kids to start their first of day of school," Gorga tells Us Weekly. "It's going to be a lot of work designing and building the new home, but Joe is an incredible builder and I'm excited to go back to where we started our family."

Melissa and Joe celebrated their ninth wedding anniversary this week and remain in the news for reasons unrelated to their marriage:

Despite their past and despite the mountain of charges against Teresa Giudice, Gorga recently said she has her sister-in-law's back.

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by Nosy Neighbor at

This week on The Real Housewives on New Jersey, we were shown a "Hair-Binger of Doom" as a six year old gets her own professional hair care line.

Yup, anything can happen in Jersey and we recap it all in our THG +/- review.

Pass the Hookah

I've lost count of the amount of products Teresa Guidice has out there but this one might just top the list. Now she's got a professional hair care line…and she's named it after her six year old.

Minus 20.  First off, I've never much liked Teresa's hair.  Second, don't you think her other kids might be a little ticked off that Milania's getting all the attention? Way to play favorites there Mom.

And is little Milania angling for her own show? Plus 8 because her parading around in a padded bra was disturbingly funny as was telling Tre to take her name off the product if she couldn't come to the launch party.

In reality it's just another Housewives money making scheme and with all the Guidice legal issues I'm sure their lawyers will take every penny they can get.

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by Hilton Hater at

Teresa Giudice may be in serious legal trouble, with 39 counts of financial fraud and a possible 50-year prison sentence hanging over her head.

But at least The Real Housewives of New Jersey star can find comfort in an unlike ally: rival sister-in-law Melissa Gorga.

The reality star told Andy Cohen last night on Watch What Happens Live that she and Giudice "are in a much better place than we've been in a long time."

  • Teresa Giudice in Florida
  • Melissa Gorga Cleavage Pic

"I've reached out and spoke to Teresa [since the indictment]," Gorga told the host. "She knows I have her back, and that the kids, of course, are the number-one priority, and that's what [husband] Joe and I are always here for... no matter what."

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by Nosy Neighbor at

The Real Housewives of New Jersey heads back to the Teresa and Jacqueline summit as the "Children of the Scorned" try to patch up their friendship.

We recap the tattered remains in THG's +/- review.

The Real '80s

After last week where Teresa Giudice called Jacqueline evil and Jac shot back with calling Tre a sociopath, I was expecting more from this summit meaning.

Minus 15 because instead of a cat fight it was a giant snooze fest. I don't think anyone really owned up to anything from the past, they just decided to move on.  How long will it be before it all falls apart once again?

The worst part was having to hear Joe Guidice talk about autism once again.

Minus 12 because the ignorant meter was  spiking off the charts. But then again, if we kept Joe to speaking about subjects he actually understood, it wouldn't give him much air time.

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by Nosy Neighbor at

The Real Housewives of New Jersey had half the cast trying to be "Best Frenemies Forever" but how long will the tenuous truce last?

We call out who's a dirty dog and who can't handle basic grammar in THG's +/- review.

The hour begins with Melissa Gorga heading out to her husband's construction site to drop off some papers. As the mud gets on her designer boots shy whines, "Is it always this dirty here?"

Melissa Gorga Continues To Sing

Minus 15. It's a construction site! I'm guessing she doesn't visit much… and I hope that equipment Joe Gorga had her driving was adequately insured because it looked as though someone was going to get hurt.

Joe's all hyped up about his photo shoot for a Sizzle Tan billboard. What makes him qualified? "I am perfect."  Minus 18. No lack of ego here.

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by Nosy Neighbor at

The Real Housewives of New Jersey are "On Thin Guid-Ice" as the retreat continues. We recap the drunken hugs and apologies in our THG +/- review.

Dr. V score some points as she quickly reduces Joe Gorga and Teresa Guidice to sobbing puddles. Plus 12. That didn't take long at all.

Hug It Out

But I wouldn't expect tearful hugs from everyone.

The good doctor marches back downstairs for her next victim and assures them all that she's not murdering anyone upstairs.  I don't think some in that crowd would have a problem if she were.

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by Nosy Neighbor at

The Real Housewives of New Jersey gives us "Scum One, Scum All" as the team builders run for cover. We recap all the therapy and mysterious black tar in our THG +/- review.

We pick up right where we left off with Joe Gorga calling sister Teresa Giudice scum. Minus 20. That really was out of line.


Sexy Time

Then Tre runs out to Juicy Joe who storms in looking for a fight but before he gets halfway there, Gorga charges him like a bull in a pasture.

Minus 30 because I can't tell what there's more of in that room, testosterone or stupidity.

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by Nosy Neighbor at

Ugly fights are a standard on The Real Housewives of New Jersey but "When Joes Collide" might just deliver the knock out punch. We recap why everyone should just retreat in our THG +/- review.

The Gorgas, Giudices, and Wakiles head to upstate New York for a team building / conflict resolution retreat. What could possibly go wrong?

On Her Knees


Yes folks, that's a joke, because this thing never even stood a chance. But let's start with who bailed before it even got started.

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