by Mischalova at . Comments

Riley Giles isn't perfect.

Sorry to break the news, Lindsay Lohan, but you should know about the guy you're infesting with all sorts of sexually transmitted diseases.

Lohan and Behold

Us Weekly has learned tha Giles â€" a snowboarder Lohan met during her two-month stay at the Cirque Lodge treatment center in Utah â€" has a messy past.

In fact, he was engaged to Bree Tierney and simply "stopped calling [her] and never told her about Lindsay," Bree's mom, Tess, said. "She found out by seeing photos. It destroyed her."

Adds a second source: "Lindsay may be in danger with Riley."

Which relationship will end first: Lindsay Lohan and Riley Giles? Or Pamela Anderson and Rick Salomon?

Of course, Giles disputes this account. He told In Touch Weekly: "I broke up with Bree a week before I started dating Lindsay. We had dated for almost two years, but it's not like we were engaged or anything."

So, who do you believe: A guy willing to have sex with Lindsay Lohan? Or an innocent girl from Utah who just wants to be loved?

by Mischalova at . Comments

This would be downright adorable if it weren't so digusting.

Lindsay Lohan and new play thing, Riley Giles, were spotted at a shopping center in Salt Lake City, Utah yesterday.

Fashin Week Photo

The couple hit up Overland for some fine sheepskins and leather, Starbucks for some caffine and Victoria's Secret for, well, you know.

Giles is competing with Javier Bardem this week for which random boyfriend can be seen with his famous girlfriend most often. It's a close battle so far.

But if it makes Riley feel any better, he's got Barden beaten by a mile for which random boyfriend needs to get tested for the most sexually transmitted diseases.

by Mischalova at . Comments

Riley Giles is calling one of three people in the photo below:

  1. His friends at home, to brag about his new celebrity status;
  2. The doctor's office, to discover the results of his latest STD test;
  3. Entertainment news reporters, to cover him and Lindsay Lohan, a la Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt.

Considering the fact that this snowboarder is actually dating Lohan, we can't possibly come to a conclusion about the phone call. How do you get inside the head of someone willing to live so dangerously?

Lindsay Lohan Handcuffed

It would be akin to wondering why Sarah Chapman would be surprised that Diddy wasn't exactly gonna be a stay-at-home husband.

Seriously, yo, I bent Lindsay Lohan over like she was Britney Spears and I was J.R. Rotem last night!

by Mischalova at . Comments

Take our advice, Riley Giles:

Ask Alex Vaggo about the best places to get tested for STDs. The latest boy toy of Paris Hilton must be familiar with such necessities.

Lindsay in Hawaii

And Giles soon will be, too. The snowboarder is dating Lindsay Lohan.

The rehabbing skank said to InTouch magazine that "yes, I am seeing someone. His name is Riley. I am really happy and taking it day by day."

And position by position, of course.

Lohan met Giles in the Utah rehab facility they each attended, one she described as being hard and "really humbling for me, but I liked how I was treated as a normal person. I had to look out for myself. It's been a great experience. I'm really grateful. Everything happens for a reason and I am in the right place now."

We've all pretty much seen Lindsay Lohan nude at this point. But Riley Giles is getting a first hand look and touch. Yech.

From now on, Lohan claims she'll stay away from the glare of entertainment news reporters.

"The biggest thing is not being in LA and staying away from the nightlife. Going out all the time was very self-destructive. But there are some things that I can do to make changes and grow up. I want to act like a woman rather than a teenager. I am doing the best I can."

We'll see how long this lasts.

by Mischalova at . Comments

Lindsay Lohan claims she received no money for the following interview with OK! Magazine, hitting newsstands on Friday.

Right, and Kimberly Bell didn't pose for Playboy out of spite for Barry Bonds.

Lohan at Coachella

Ridiculous statements aside, here are a few highlights from the interview Lohan gave the celebrity gossip magazine, soon after she was released from rehab earlier this week...

On her second DUI arrest in less than two months: "[I hit] rock-bottom. Everything in my life came to a point where I had to make a decision; the arrest that night helped me come to a point where I had to make one."

On how she she plans to stay on the road to recovery: "[By surrounding myself] with good people who have their hearts and their minds in the right places."

On not saying goodbye to the Hollywood industry: "Absolutely not â€" never! I'm here to stay... My talent is a gift, and I'm going to use it in the right way."

On the the feud between her father, Michael, and mother, Dina: "I wish it would stop. It hurts when two people you love argue with one another. I don't think any child wants to see their parents argue or see their family fall apart. Unfortunately, it happens, and when it does, they should do it with as little effect on their children as possible."

It's way too late for that Lindsay. Let's just hope your sister, Ali Lohan, hasn't been doomed to your same path.

by Mischalova at . Comments

Without any balls to play with in rehab, Lindsay Lohan has resorted to fondling pumpkins.

We hate to think of where this alcoholic is taking the Halloween decoration. She'll probably carve the face of Calum Best into it and then stick it between her legs.

Lindsay Lohan Playboy Photo

We wonder what music Lindsay Lohan is listening to before she goes to fornicate with a pumpkin. Britney Spears? Kanye West? Rihanna?

by Mischalova at . Comments

You've missed celebrity gossip updates about Lindsay Lohan, haven't you?

Go on, admit that you can't stand this booze hound of a skank... yet also can't wait to see what she'll do next.

According to her evil mother, Dina Lohan, here's the answer: nothing. Contrary to reports stating otherwise, the Firecrotch Queen will not be leaving the Cirque Lodge rehab program in Utah this weekend.

People magazine reports that Dina emailed Access Hollywood this week with the breaking news that her daughter is "staying in Utah."

For those that think Kiefer Suhterland is the first star to drive drunk, don't forget: Lindsay's treatment at the facility began last month, following her early morning July 24 arrest in Santa Monica on suspicion of DUI after a brief car chase.

From there, a small amount of cocaine was found on the ex-sexual partner of (deep breath now...) Calum Best, Harry Morton, Jude Law, Criss Angel, AJ Lamas, James Blunt and many others.

Immediately after she was booked, her attorney blabbered on about how Lohan had "relapsed" and was receiving "medical care."

by Mischalova at . Comments

As far as celebrity news headlines go, the sentence above is as surprising as any of the following:

Britney Spears is a train wreck.

Email Check

Suri Cruise is cute.

Victoria Beckham likes to wear tight shirts.

Nevertheless, new information has surfaced regarding just how much Lindsay Lohan loves to wet her sexual appetite. It's our job to pass it along.

A source told Star magazine that the Firecrotch Queen has "been having erotic dreams about her former lovers, like Calum Best, Wilmer Valderrama, and Jared Leto. Her counsellors are trying to get her to understand that she's substituting one addiction for another."

The insider added: "Besides the obvious dangers of STDs, having indiscriminate sex can lead to emotional heartbreak, and that can lead to drug and alcohol abuse. If she doesn't come to grips with this, Lindsay is going to find herself back in rehab-sex addiction."

Maybe she'll be joined there by Kim Kardashian.

by Mischalova at . Comments

Sorry, guys.

We know you're dying to see Lindsay Lohan nude or Jennifer Love Hewitt nude, but we're here to provide you with the next best thing:

A glimpse at the boobs of these mediocre actresses.

Once you've voted in our previous Clash of the Cleavage - pitting Megan Fox against Tara Reid, in all her drunken, plastic glory - let us know which pair of knockers below you'd prefer to take a handful of.

Don't worry. There's no wrong answer. Just a sexy one.