by Hilton Hater at

Lehman Brothers, Sheman Brothers.

The John McCain campaign has found an issue on which it can release a definitive, meaningful statement: Lindsay Lohan!

Looking For Indrina?

It all started when The Chicago Sun-Times quoted an unnamed high-level Barack Obama insider this morning,  who said that camp turned down Lohan's offer to host an event because she "is not exactly the kind of high-profile star who would be a positive for us."

In response, McCain blowhard spokesman Tucker Bounds told TMZ: "So let me get this straight -- they turned away Lindsay Lohan, but Barack Obama has friends like unrepentant terrorist Bill Ayers and convicted felon Tony Rezko? Maybe LiLo is just too upstanding for Barack Obama."

Yes, it really does appear that Bounds referred to Lohan as "LiLo."

We can imagine the eyes rolling on Tommy Vietor, an Obama spokesperson, when he replied: "Glad to see they're focused on the important issues over in McCain HQ."

Lohan, it should be noted, is on record as having serious issues with Sarah Palin. See how intelligent one can be when one isn't on drugs all the time?

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by Hilton Hater at

It's safe to assume Lindsay Lohan and Pink were big fans of Tina Fey's Sarah Palin impression. Who wouldn't be?

But count these two celebrities as the latest stars to come out against the Republican nominee for Vice President. Lohan, sounding more grounded by the day, said about Palin:

No Effing Way

"I feel it's necessary for me to clarify that I am not against Sarah Palin as a mother or woman.... I would have liked to have remained impartial, however I am afraid that the 'lipstick on a pig' comments will overshadow the issues and the fact that I believe Barack Obama is the best choice, in this election, for president..."

Lohan, who is in a same-sex relationship with Samantha Ronson, went on to question Palin's views on homosexuality:

"Is it a sin to be gay? Should it be a sin to be straight? Or to use birth control? Or to have sex before marriage? Or even to have a child out of wedlock? Is our country so divided that the Republicans best hope is a narrow minded, media obsessed homophobe?"

Pink, meanwhile, was more biting and direct in her Sarah Palin commentary:

"She is not the woman that's going to come behind Hillary Clinton and do anything that Hillary Clinton would've been capable of … I can't imagine overturning Roe vs. Wade. She's not of this time. The woman terrifies me."

Do celebrities' voices carry more weight than the average citizen? Of course not. But it's nice to hear that this election has inspired so many to take a look at the issues involved.

We'd love to hear from readers on this topic. Who are you supporting and why?

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by Hilton Hater at

Because Lindsay Lohan hasn't had a penis inside of her for months, we can rule out the possibility that she's pregnant.

But the actress will star in the 2009 comedy, Labor Pains, which is focused on a woman that pretends to be knocked up in order to avoid being fired.

Here's that film's official poster:

As long as she continues to have sex with Samantha Ronson, Lindsay Lohan needn't worry about a real-life pregnancy.

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by Hilton Hater at

Congratulations, universe. You win.

After reading how Lindsay Lohan is "really happy," in the latest issue of Marie Claire, we find ourselves glad this former loose celebrity has settled down.

She's seemed legitimately stable since she began dating Samantha Ronson, who Lindsay described to the magazine as follows:

"She's a great person. And she's a great influence on people around her. But I think that anything that's changed [in] my life is because of me. I've gone through it, and I've learned to deal with it and I've made the decision to move forward."

It certainly isn't because of your awful mother, Dina Lohan, that much is clear.

Marie Claire Cover Gal

Lindsay Lohan is happy in her relationship with Samantha Ronson. We can't help but wish these two the very best.

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by Free Britney at

It used to be an open invite to magazines and dozens of dudes, but it looks like from now on, only Samantha Ronson will be seeing Lindsay Lohan naked.

The actress, who's become an ardent fan of girl-on-girl action in recent months, has just turned down a $700,000 offer to pose nude in Playboy.

Specifically, Hugh Hefner's enterprise wanted Lindsay Lohan topless for an eight-page spread in Playboy's 55th-anniversary issue this January.

"If there's nudity, the answer's no ... She's not going down that [New York Magazine] road again," the actress' rep said in a statement to Playboy, referring to the strange Lindsay Lohan nude Marilyn Monroe tribute last winter.

Lindsay Lohan Naked

Lindsay Lohan nude used to be a far more frequent, public thing.

Playboy hoped to have Lohan do a tribute to '60s sex kitten Ann-Margret and her film "Kitten With a Whip," which is supposedly one of Lindsay's faves.

Instead, she'll probably just be content starring in a private sex tape involving a SamRo with a whip, some handcuffs and who the hell knows what else.

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by Hilton Hater at

Leave Bristol Palin alone, Lindsay Lohan says!

Well, sort of.

On her latest MySpace blog, Lohan writes that discussion about Bristol's impending baby with Levi Johnston is distracting people from learning about Sarah Palin; you know, the Republican nominee for Vice President.

Lindsay herself then adds a salient point, however, that connects Bristol's pregnancy with part of her mother's platform.

“I think the real problem comes from the fact that we are taking the focus off of getting to know Sarah Palin and her political views, and what she can do to make our country a less destructive place," Lohan blogged, adding:

"It's distracting from the real issues, the real everyday problems that this country experiences... I get Sarah Palin's views against abortion, but I would much prefer to hear more about what she can do for our country, rather than how her daughter is going to have a child no matter what. Maybe focus on delivering some words and policy with stronger impact like Joe Biden."

Lindsay Lohan asks for less coverage of Bristol Palin and more focus on what's wrong with Governor Palin's views on sex education.

Lohan then went on to stress the importance of sex education, a topic that Palin has stated she believes should revolve solely around abstinence-only teaching. In 2006, the Governor said any "explicit sex-ed programs will not find my support."

"I think that parents need to recognize how important it is to talk to their children about the things that can result from being sexually active if they aren't protecting themselves," Lohan writes.

It's true.

If Palin, as such a staunch supporter of abstinence-only education, cannot teach her own child to refrain from pre-marital sex, might that be a sign that such a platform is ineffective?

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by Hilton Hater at

Lindsay Lohan has been more secretive about her relationship with Samantha Ronson than John McCain's camp had tried to be about Bristol Palin's pregnancy.

But a recentl blog entry by the actress pretty mcuh reveals her true, strong feelings for the manish looking DJ. Here it is:

Always Playing Victim

Current mood: smitten
so, samantha and i are looking for DIXIE CUPS… does anyone remember them??? They were given in school as a desert. They are half vanilla/half chocolate.. I have to have them before she gets back-so anyone that can help me find them-please please please, post it for me to see!!!!
take care xoxo
this song is for sr… ILY
Currently listening:
Trouble
By Ray LaMontagne
Release date: By 2004-09-14

It's safe to assume that "sr" stands for Samantha Ronson, while "ILY' is code for "I Love You."

We make fun of Lindsay Lohan a lot. A whole, whole lot.

But her relationship with Ronson actually does seem legit, and we're glad to see Lindsay not flaunting it to the press, as she did so many times in the past during flings with Criss Angel, A.J. Lamas and many, many, many, many, many other men.

Sorry, old habit.

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by Hilton Hater at

Michael Lohan has said he's engaged to Erin Muller, but the arrangement won't be made official until certain family issues are resolved.

If the ex-convict is waiting for daughter Lindsay to forgive him, well, he'll never be officially engaged.

Lindsay Lohan Nip Slip

Here's what Lindsay wrote in her latest MySpace blog:

“If you have something to say to me, say it to my face. That’s what I have believed my whole life. Don’t be a coward and say it to others first, let alone all the media in the world. I think we know where the rest of this blog is going…

Congratulations, Michael Lohan. You've managed to make us feel sorry for Lindsay Lohan.

“If you guessed it had to do with my father–then you guessed right! It really hurts, because I have tried. After all that my mother and siblings have gone through, I really tried to make things work. For the hope of having a father again-wanting things to change- even though people have said, some people will forever remain the same.

"He has become a public embarrassment and a bully ...He has no idea what is going on in my life because I have chosen not to involve him in it- His recent attack on my life and my loved ones is simply for an ADDICTION THAT HE HAS- FAME.... If he really cared about me and my life, then he would learn to respect my wishes by staying out of it.

“[BFF Samantha Ronson] has not and would never sell me out. Nor has my mother, who is wonderful. This further proves that any information that my father has about me or the people in my life is internet based- and about as accurate as a page six item. I’m not going to engage any further, though i probably could go on…"

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