Lamar Odom

After a sex-swing filled season 2 premiere one week ago, the newest episode of Khloe & Lamar was more subdued, as the latter was literally losing sleep over the NBA lockout. This had widespread ramifications for the family.

Read on for THG's recap of the episode, +/- style...

"I think it's because of the lockout," Lamar says. "Basketball's always been able to wear me down." Wonder if he blames his 8 PPG/5 RPG on the lockout too. Minus 29.

Lamar says he sometimes goes 2-3 DAYS without sleeping. Plus 19 for even being able to function as a human being, much less in an NBA game, if that's even half-true.

"Lamar has been keeping me up. It is so frustrating," Khloe whines. Minus 7.

Due to Lamar keeping Khloe up all night, she oversleeps and ends up being late to a photo shoot. Plus 10 for sparing us Khloe Kardashian pics for a few hours.

"You have not been able to get pregnant because of our guys' sleep schedule," Kim Kardashian says. "It's out of hand." As is Kim's entire existence. Minus 20.

The poster above says "Wherevear." Minus 40.

The NBA season Lamar Odom would likely just wish to forget took a tragic, personal turn this week.

Already struggling on the court - the power forward is averaging just 7.7 points and 4.5 rebounds his first year in Dallas - the reality star missed his team's game against the  Lakers on Wednesday and will return some time after this weekend's All-Star break.

The reason for his absence?

"Lamar's dad had a health scare. It's very serious," an insider tells E! News, although Lamar's father reportedly told Radar Online that he's "depressed," but doing "a lot better" now.

Lamar and Khloe Kardashian are spending time with the former's family in Los Angeles while Joe Odom battles this illness and Dallas coach Rick Carlisle expects his bench player will return early next week.

On the season two premiere of Khloe & Lamar, viewers watched one Kardashian sibling grow frustrated by her man's lack of sexual desire, while another Kardashian sister got annoyed by that same man's inattentive friendship.

Read on for THG's recap of the episode, +/- style...

We see shots of Kim Kardashian pretending to kry over Kris Humphries. MINUS 127.

Khloe refers to Lamar as "Lammie." MINUS 1.

Lamar laments Rob Kardashian moving out. He looks to be on the verge of tears. PLUS 7 for what appears to be a legitimate bromance.

Khloe installs her own sex swing, saying "this is like, so much work, to be a sexual person." It proceeds to collapse the moment she sits in it. PLUS 8 for Khloe's efforts, and PLUS 8 more for our avoidance of any fat jokes here.

Rob is mad at Lamar for not attending his Dancing with the Stars tapings. Lamar is mad at Rob for blowing off lunch with him and Khloe. MINUS 11 for this bromance turning into a romance.

"I haven't seen this many sex toys since college," says Lamar upon enterting Khloe's "Sex Chamber of Love." MINUS 17 for lying. The guy went to the University of Rhode Island, not Arizona State.

"Men get more hormonal periods than women do," Khloe says. MINUS 3 for using the word period.

"Even when I'm not there, he should know I'm still there. Sometimes, though, I think he wants me there in a physical sense." PLUS 4 for Lamar finally getting it.

MINUS 13 for Rob and Lamar's handshake.

MINUS 3 for Khloe and Lamar's wedding photo blanket.

Khloe realizes that what she has with Lamar is "pure" and doesn't have to always be based sex. PLUS 5 for coming to that realization and PLUS 4 for the episode ending with Lamar motor-boating his wide.

TOTAL: Minus 147

Welcome to the 1st annual Tournament of THG: Couples Edition!

Having just crowned Demi Lovato as our most popular star, and with Valentine's Day right around the corner, it's time for you  to decide the most popular couple!

We have chosen 16 of our favorites for this tournament, but YOUR VOTES pick the winner! The concept is easy: Pick your favorite of the two pairs in each poll. Done.

First up? Our #1 seeds, Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart, against #16 seeds Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom! VOTE, then check out the full bracket below:

 

Rob & Kristen

Khloe & Lamar

Which celebrity couple do you like better, Robsten or Khlomar? Cast your vote now in this first round matchup and help us crown THG's Top Celebrity Couple!

View Poll »

This poll is now closed! Here were the results:

 65.5%

Rob & Kristen

 34.5%

Khloe & Lamar

Total Votes: 4151

One by one, we will post polls of these respective matchups, and then after each round, update the bracket as some couples advance, while others are eliminated.

It's easy, fun and all decided by YOU! Here's the Tournament of THG field:

The E! reality show circus is about to mess with Texas.

A couple months after Lamar Odom successfully lobbied for a trade, season two of Khloe & Lamar will premiere with a focus on the big move, as the couple heads from Los Angeles to Dallas, bringing Robert Kardashian along for some reason.

Will they find a new house in the area? How is Odom akin to a box of chocolate? What what hilarious show returns following this February 19 premiere? Watch the following promo for these answers and more!

Khloe & Lamar Season 2 Promo

The intern who writes Kim Kardashian's blog Kim Kardashian is an idiot.

In a new website post, the reality star asks her drones "dolls" to vote brother-in-law Lamar Odom into the All-Star Game this year. There are just two problems with this request:

1. Odom is averaging a paltry 6.7 points and five rebounds per game this season, down from career numbers of 14.5 and 8.8, respectively.
2. Someone might wanna tell Kim that Lamar no longer plays for the Lakers, following an immature trade demand because his feelings were hurt that Los Angeles wanted to upgrade its roster. Notice the photos Kim included with her plea:

To vote Odom on to the All-Star roster would be an insult to professional basketball. It would take away a spot from a player who actually deserves it.

Seriously, Kim, for someone who spends so much time underneath with athletes, we'd think you'd have more respect for the world of sports.

Lamar Odom is off to an extremely poor start on his new team.

Following a trade demand last month, the reality star/power forward was dealt to the Dallas Mavericks from the Los Angeles Lakers, with many experts predicting the addition would help the Mavs in their quest to repeat as NBA champions.

But Dallas is currently tied for the worst record in the Western Conference (2-4), while Odom's numbers are drastically down across the board, as you can see here:

Might the Kardashian kurse have taken a few years to katch up to Lamar?

He's not the only baller struggling after a summer filled with reality show tapings and red carpet appearances. Kris Humphries and the Nets are 1-5, with Kim's ex recently suffering a shoulder injury that has sidelined him indefinitely.

Let's hope Odom soon picks it up. If his stock falls too low, and wife Khloe Kardashian grows desperate to get her man back in the news, we know what will come next. It rhymes with schmex zape.

Oh, happy days. The holidays can finally begin!

Early this morning, Kim Kardashian and kompany released the family's official Christmas card, with each member getting his or her black tie on and Kim, naturally, standing all alone.

If you listen closely enough, you can almost hear the publicist-inspired whining coming out of her mouth...

The photo was snapped by Nick Saglimbeni and there’s a apparently a 3D version available for those that purchase 3D glasses. On a related note: if you purchase 3D glasses to view to view the Kardashian Christmas card, don't stop driving at the store. Just keep right on going to a psychologist's office.

Tell this professional it's an emergency. You clearly need major help.

[Photo: Kim Kardashian Blog]

While Kobe Bryant laments the loss of a key Lakers teammate, both Lamar Odom and Khloe Kardashian are being welcomed enthusiastically by members of the Dallas Mavericks organization.

First, Mavs coach Rick Carlisle told the press that Khloe was his favorite Kardashian. Now, former Dancing with the Stars contestant/team owner Mark Cuban has come out and told Extra:

"She's welcome with open arms. We can't wait to have the whole family, can't wait to have Khloe and Lamar, we'll go from there."

And it sounds like the team will have more family members to welcome soon. Odom told Us Weekly that Rob Kardashian will soon join him and Khloe in Dallas, while various sources report the Kardashians are psyched about the trade because it allows them to expand their DASH franchise to a new city.

We'll give NBA Finals MVP Dirk Nowitzki the final word on the trade for now:

"[Odom] can bring the ball up, he can shoot, he can post. He's a great decision-maker with the ball and one of the best passing big men in the league today. So, we should be able to have fun with each other."

We're very sorry, Dallas. But Lamar Odom, Khloe Kardashian and, it's safe to assume, a full E! camera crew are headed your way.

The Los Angeles Lakers finalized a trade with the Dallas Mavericks over the weekend, sending the reality star/power forward to Texas in exchange for a $8.9 million trade exception, as well as a protected first-round pick.

Odom actually requested the deal because his feelings were hurt when the Lakers previously included him in a trade for Chris Paul. The NBA vetoed that exchange, leading Odom to whine to The Los Angeles Times: "You don't want to go to no place you're not wanted."

Khloe has said she'll follow her man wherever he goes, while Kobe Bryant is sad to say goodbye to last year's Sixth Man of the Year.

"To be honest with you, I don't like it," the star two guard said. "It's tough to lose Lamar. Pau [Gasol] is still here, and we're all thankful for that. It's hard when you've been through so many battles with players to just see them go somewhere else. It's tough."

Now, we're begging Dallas: PLEASE sign Kris Humphries.

[Photo: WENN.com]