Kris Humphries

Apparently, Kris Humphries is not the only one sick of cameras invading his life.

At her 31st birthday party in Las Vegas on Saturday night, Kim Kardashian told People magazine of her two-month marriage: "It's not been ideal because you're newlyweds and you want privacy."

That does sound tough. If only there was something Kim could do about it.

Kris and Kim's relationship has been a hot topic among supermarket tabloids over the last few weeks, with many believing they are just pretending to be on the rocks because season two of Kourtney and Kim Take New York premieres on November 28.

The show needs a storyline, after all, one a tad more exciting than Kim's wooden personality and Humphries' lack of a basketball career at the moment.

Continue Reading...

Are Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries at a krossroads? Or is this kouple helping to plant stories in the media in order to hype season two of their upcoming reality show?

We'll let readers kome to their own konklusions, but two new tabloid kovers are emphasizing the ongoing rumor that this marriage is koming to an end.

First, Us Weekly quotes an anonymous, hilarious source who says the newlyweds "are not getting along at all. Kris is not drinking the Kardashian Kool-Aid, and it's causing major problems."

The main problem actually centers around the NBA lockout: with no games to play, and no income at the moment, Humphries is allegedly a drag to his new wife, according to a friend who cites an October 21 argument between the pair:

"She told him he need s to do something productive... He needs to get off his ass, like, yesterday."

Continue Reading...

Kris Humphries allegedly wants to yell KUT!

Insiders tell Life & Style - who latest issues screams that Kris and Kim Kardashian are headed for a split - that the power forward "wants out of filming" every waking moment of his existence.

"They've had no time without a camera. He knows he signed up for this, but I think it's weighed on him," the source claims.

And Humphries is stuck with Kim and her kamera krew more than he previously believed would happen, considering his employer (the NBA) has canceled the first four weeks of its regular season as the result of a labor dispute.

Humphries makes $20,000 per episode, the tabloid says, and recently threatened his wife with the warning: "I'll only be your little TV husband for a few more weeks."

This, of course, confused Kim to no end: she doesn't understand the difference between TV and real life.

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries may be married, but new tabloid stories report these two are living totally separate lives. Case in point:

Kim traveled to Dubai last weekend - and pocketed $1 million while teasing a future hotel in the area - while Kris partied up a storm at three different New York City clubs.

Moreover, season two of Kourtney & Kim Take New York will need a storyline beyond this couple simply being content, and Life & Style claims to have scooped it...

Look for Kris to clash with Kim's best friend, Jonathan Cheban, on the upcoming E! series, which kicks off next month. A show insider teases that Humphries will address his wife on the program and say:

You have to choose, him or me.

"Kim's mapping out 2012, including holidays, and Kris isn't a part of it," a source claims. "Any itineraries for the future don't include Kris very much. That's not a good sign."

It is if Kim is looking for her own spin-off. Back in That Ass: Kim K. Takes Cali anyone?

In one of the not remotely staged clips airing this Monday on the E!'s Kim’s Fairytale Wedding special, Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries try to enjoy a casual meal as a couple in this for money love.

But the paparazzi are abundant, making it seriously hard for Kim and Kris to spend quality time with their own cameraman and prompting the NBA power forward to propose a solution:

"Maybe you should just move to Minnesota with me. We could move into my little house on the lake, we could just start popping out babies.”

Of course, Kim doesn't react well to this idea because she'd be leaving her family. No, not Khloe, Kourtney, Kendall and Kylie. The guys from OK! Weekly and In Touch who pay most of her bills...

Kris Humphries to Kim Kardashian: Baby Time?

Yes, they still do.

On an episode of Ellen that airs today - check our local listings! - Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries renew their nearly two-month old wedding vows.

We'd typically make endless fun of such a ridiculous cry for more attention, but DeGeneres officiated this pretend ceremony and cracked us up when she advised Kim to repeat after her:

“I take Kris to be my husband and co-star, to love and honor you to always put you first - or at least above Khloe, but below Kourtney!”

Of course, Kim then had to go ahead and ruin everything by being a total liar once again. Asked what she'd change about her and her man's big day, Kardashian said she'd "elope." Right. Does ANYone believe that? We have about $17 million reasons not to.

The most annoying celebrity on the planet is late, folks. For her next red carpet appearance? No.

“She was supposed to get her period and didn’t," a source close to Kim Kardashian (VERY close to Kim Kardashian, apparently) tells OK! Weekly.

Of course, nowhere on this cover does it actually say Kim is pregnant, just that it's "baby time," a child is "on the way" and that the reality star is "showing already." If Kardashian were actually knocked up, the Internet would have exploded hours ago.

“Kim always thought she’d have several kids by age 30, so in her mind she’s behind schedule," an insider tells the tabloid. “Kim’s been going through all the K names. She even has a baby-name book and looks up the meaning of each one.”

Considering the family into which this kid will be born, permit us a suggestion: klusterfuck. Kim, you can call us for the meaning of that one.

Being Mr. Kim Kardashian cannot be easy. Still, Kris Humphries had to know what he was getting into, right? Maybe not, if dueling tabloids are to be believed.

Sources say the baller hasn't exactly won over Kim's tight-knit family.

That's putting it midly. Dude reportedly ripped Kourtney Kardashian for being "slave" to son Mason, roughhouses Kim so hard that her sisters call him "this weird, big clumsy oaf" and "was being a dick" through much of their courtship.

Married only one month, Kim is already forced to defend her love. Or just miserable, depending on which totally accurate supermarket gossip rag you pick up.

All of those quotes are courtesy of Us Weekly. Star, meanwhile, suggests that Kim isn't a big fan of Kris lately either, "fighting bitterly" with her new spouse.

Two major points of contention:

1. Their life is completely, comically staged.
2. Kris noticed.

Continue Reading...

Hmm ... which of these things is not like the other?

Scott Disick is neither married, nor tall, nor ripped, nor successful in his craft (he has none that we know of). But he did put a baby in one of the Kardashian sisters, so he earned his place alongside NBA stars Lamar Odom and Kris Humphries just the same.

With Kourtney, Khloe and Kim all committed to their men for the long haul, who do you think landed the best catch? Put another way, who'd you rather ... you know?

Cast your vote in this CRITICAL poll question below ...

Despite the holiday weekend, and despite the fact that the episodes focused on an event from months ago, the two-part season finale of Keeping Up with the Kardashians drew record ratings on Sunday and Monday nights.

Approximately 3.5 million viewers tuned each evening to watch Kris Humphries propose to Kim Kardashian... even thought WE ALREADY KNOW WHAT SHE SAID AND EVEN THOUGH EVERY MOMENT ON THIS PROGRAM IS 100% SCRIPTED. SERIOUSLY, PEOPLE, IT'S NOT REAL! KIM DOESN'T EVEN UPDATE HER OWN FACEBOOK OR SEND HER OWN TWEETS!

Sorry. Something must have happened to our keyboard there.

Anyway... a seventh season of this utter nonsense is all but guaranteed, though fans (who are you? Show yourselves!) need not wait until next summer to see Kim and Kris again: they are currently filming season two of Kourtney and Kim Take New York.

Keeping Up with the Kardashians Clip: Wasted Kris Jenner