by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Television viewers have quite the conundrum on Sunday night.

On one hand, they could watch a scary, scripted show about characters who will go to extreme lengths to get what they want - on the other, they could watch True Blood!

Disick and Kourtney

Indeed, Kourtney and Khloe Kardashian return to take over Miami on their nauseating E! reality show, while HBO premieres season three of the most violent, suspenseful, sex-filled drama on TV. Which will you tune in for?

Perhaps this Tale of the Tape comparison can help you decide...

1. MAIN VILLAIN...
True Blood: Eric Northman.
Kourtney and Khloe: Scott Disick.
Edge: True Blood.

2. CHARACTER WE FEEL MOST SORRY FOR...
True Blood: Tara.
Kourtney and Khloe: Mason Dash.
Edge: Kourtney and Khloe.

3. RECURRING BEAUTY...
True Blood: The Queen of Louisiana.
Kourtney and Khloe: Kim Kardashian.
Edge: Kourtney and Khloe.

4. BEST BODY BELONGS TO...
True Blood: Ryan Kwanten.
Kourtney and Khloe: Kourtney.
Edge: True Blood.

5. MOST SCRIPTED FIGHT...
True Blood: Vampires vs. werewolves.
Kourtney and Khloe: THIS.
Edge: Kourtney and Khloe.

THE VERDICT: With a last-minute victory in the category of most scripted, outlandish scenario, Kourtney and Khloe pull the upset! They win this Tale of the Tape by a final score of 3-2. But True Blood characters can take comfort in this fact:

Many of them may wanna rip open our flesh, but we'd still prefer to hang out with them any day of the week.

Which season premiere will you watch?

 

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

The Hollywood Gossip staff is excited to bring back our Tale of the Tape, the Internet sensation in which we break down various matchups within the celebrity gossip world.

This week, our editors had no choice but to pit a pair of newborns against one another. We hope Mason Dash Disick and Hank Baskett IV live long, happy, fruitful lives; but it's not clear if this is possible.

Jayden James, Britney Spears Picture

That's what happens when your respective parents - Kendra Wilkinson and Kourtney Kardashian - seem to care more about publicity than child-rearing.

We've already asked readers which of these kids is worse off, but we're here now to examine each child's prospects in closer detail. Who will prevail in this grueling battle? Let's find out. Ding, ding!

1. FATHER IS...
Hank IV: A back-up wide receiver on the Colts.
Mason: A jobless jackass.
Edge: Hank.

2. MOTHER IS...
Hank IV: An E! reality star.
Mason: An E! reality star.
Edge: Tie.

3. NAMED AFTER...
Hank IV: Dad, grandpa and great-grandpa.
Mason: Some crappy clothing boutique.
Edge: Hank.

4. CREEPY, OLD MAN INFLUENCE
Hank IV: Hugh Hefner.
Mason: Bruce Jenner.
Edge: Hank.

5. AUNTS AND AUNT-LIKE FIGURES
Hank IV: Bridget Marquardt and Holly Madison.
Mason: Kim and Khloe Kardashian.
Edge: Mason.

Continue Reading...

Kourtney Kardashian Biography

Kourtney Kardashian Photo Kourtney Kardashian is the least known of the older Kardashian sisters. She's probably the best looking, though. Kourtney has never made... More »
Born
Birthplace
Los Angeles, California
Full Name
Kourtney Mary Kardashian
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