by Hilton Hater at

Someone really needs to get Kourtney Kardashian a GPS for her bikini body.

The unmarried mother continues to lose her figure every few weeks. Fortunately, she always recovers it, just in time to grace the cover of a supermarket tabloid. Amazing how that works, isn't it?

Kourt Slims Down

Even though she's already told us how she lost 33 pounds, while also having already shared her diet secrets with the world, Kourtney is featured yet again in the latest issue of Life & Style.

Forget about her sister's dangerous new love, we're dying to discover the tips that can help us get airbrushed by magazines lose so much weight. Take it away, Kourt!

Small diet tweaks: "I used to always get a chai latte from Starbucks, but I just switched to one espresso shot... I was eating a lot of dried fruit, and I didn't realize how much sugar that added. And now I'll eat raw almonds instead of salted ones."

Embrace a physical activity: "I'm big on running - just putting on my iPod Shuffle and going for a run by my house."

Eat fresh food: "Frozen yogurt tastes so chemically to me because I've been eating salads and salmon and chicken. Fresh food is so much better."

Then, there's this final tip: Get pregnant in order to increase ratings for your reality show, pocket lots of cash by exploiting this situation for every tabloid in the country, use that money to pay a personal trainer and personal chef to help you get toned, use Photoshop, offer absolutely nothing of substance to the world.

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by Hilton Hater at

Kourtney Kardashian has lost a great deal of her baby weight because she takes QuickTrim, the same unhealthy, non-FDA approved supplement shilled for by sisters Kim and Khloe.

You're welcome. We just saved you the price of this week's OK! Weekly.

Indeed, Kourtney poses on the cover of that magazine's latest edition, once again cradling son Mason and setting a great example for talentless socialites around the world:

You, too, can achieve fame and fortune if you get knocked up outside marriage and sell your soul to a weight loss supplement.

Save yourself 50 cents. Read about Jessica Simpson's new body, Jen and Gerard's flirting and everything related to Jake Pavelka on THG!

This is the third consecutive week Kourtney and Mason have graced the cover of a supermarket tabloid. You tell us:

Is this an example of capitalism at its best, or of an explotive mother pimping out her helpless baby in exchange for an increased bank account?

Baby Cover
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