by Hilton Hater at . Comments

According to a new tabloid cover story, Kim Kardashian is sick of taking revenge out on Reggie Bush via her bikini body.

Instead, she's now setting her sexy sights on sister Kourtney Kardashian!

In a hilariously contrived story, In Touch Weekly claims the sisters are "at war" over which is the hottest member of the least talented family on television.

"They are always looking at each other’s body and picking it apart," an insider tells the magazine, adding that Kourtney "always makes fun of Kim’s... cellulite."

Bikini Body Battle!

The same imaginary source says Kim is jealous that Kourtney's relationship with Scott Disick, along with her son and reality show, has made Kourtney the most popular, hottest star in the family.

“Kim isn’t about to give up her throne without a fight," the friends says, warning readers that they should expect an influx of club appearances and skimpy outfits from Kim over the next few weeks.

This is all utter nonsense, but THG might as well stoke the supposed sisterly fire. Compare their bodies above and decide: Who would you rather...

 

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

The season finale of Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami aired last night, but don't worry fans: these two utter wastes of Oxygen will be back next Sunday night for the premiere of Keeping Up with the Kardashians!

For now, let's review the final 2010 installment of Kourtney and Khloe scripted series, as brought to you below by a THG intern...

Attention Kraver

Season finales are meant to conclude with a bang, but this one was pretty dull. As they prepared to head back to California, Kourtney and Khloe handed off the Dash store and tied up loose ends and... that was about it.

I wonder if Dash will go to sh*t - literally and figuratively - again now that the girls are leaving.  I’m sure some crisis will be staged so the girls have to jet back down eventually and film a third season.

The point of the whole episode was to show Kourtney and Scott Disick going through couples counseling.  Despite the fact that Kourtney says she hates therapy, she goes to one of Scott’s sessions.  She says she wants to support him, but not enable him. 

She speaks privately with the doctor later on about the fine line between the supporting and enabling and breaks down a little.

Continue Reading...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

We can at least say the following about this week's Kardashian tabloid coverage:

It doesn't only feature Kim in a bikini.

It does, however, focus on exaggerations and lies surrounding the world's least talented, most photographed family.

First, Life & Style quotes Kim and claims she has broken up with Miles Austin and is now SINGLE AGAIN.

Referring to the fifth season of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, the busty reality star tells the magazine: "I think this is the first time I've ever really been single filming the show. You'll see me single and having a good time."

There's just one problem with this supposed exclusive...

... Keeping Up with the Kardashians was filmed MONTHS ago. In the new trailer for it, we see a single Kim meeting and dating Austin. Nice try, though, Life & Style!

Us Weekly, meanwhile, breaks the news that Kourtney, Khloe and Kim are TORN APART due to Kourtney's relationship with Scott Disick. However, Kris Jenner, Scott's main critic, recently gave the loser a stamp of approval.

Still, a family insider claims "there have been knock-down, drag-out fights between the girls over Scott."

Look, tabloids of the world. These siblings waste enough of our time by pimping themselves out and sharing every nugget of their lives with the public. Must you really give them even more attention than they already have?

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian and Justin Bieber are flirtatious friends.

In fact, they're featured in a new Elle magazine spread together, the first images from which you can view HERE.

But these popular celebrities will become heated rivals in the fall, as their respective memoirs are scheduled to hit stores within a month of one another. Yesterday, we gave readers an early glimpse at the cover for "First Step 2 Forever: My Story."

Now, Kim and her equally useless sisters have released the featured image for "Kardashian Konfidential." The autobiography will be released on November 23 and couldn't be more misleading: when was the last time anyone in this family kept anything confidential?!?

Compare the covers below and then vote:

Justin Bieber Book Cover

Which cover do you like best?

 

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

In the following trailer for Keeping Up with the Kardashians, Bruce Jenner says he's "sick and tired of all of this."

The former Olympian is referring to contrived problems in his marriage, but he might as well be speaking for millions of individuals who shake their heads over the deterioration of society, largely exemplified by the interest in this utterly talentless family.

Among the previewed developments writers have penned and producers have set up for Khloe, Kourtney, Kim and company on the new season, which premieres August 22:

  • Kim is set up with Miles Austin, and gets upset over texts to "whores."
  • Kris flirts with a younger man.
  • Scott Disick complains about his quasi in-laws and threatens a move to New York.
  • Kim compliments Khloe on her vagina. 

Watch the promo below and ask yourself: Is this really what television has devolved into?

Continue Reading...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Due to writers putting it in the script his drinking and anger problem, Scott Disick is in therapy.

This supposed treatment was a major focus of last night's Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami, which THG forced an intern to watch and review below. Enjoy...

New Kourt

Kourtney’s true other half is back in Miami this week, as Khloe Kardashiam Odom (did her ring actually get bigger?) returns to finish out the season of her show.  Along with Khloe comes a few more Kardashians/Jenners.  Mama Kris is there to look over her little cubs, for example.

Kris brings along little sisters Kendall and Kylie, who are turning into mini versions of their famous older sisters.  They run around the apartment squealing as Kris settles in to take care of business. This is the first time we’ve really seen Kourtney admit that she knows Scott is sick. We also get to see Scott in therapy, attempting to confront his issues.

Kourtney assures Kris that she is handling everything and not to worry, but of course Kris takes things into her own hands.  She visits Scott at the hotel where is he staying.  In her attempt to talk to some sense into him, she also gives him some treatment brochures.  Scott responds by promptly throwing them out the window the second she leaves.

Continue Reading...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Do you wanna look like THIS?

If so, you're in luck: Kourtney, Khloe and Kim Kardashian have confirmed that they will partner with Australian designer Bruno Schiavi's Jupi Corp. to create a line of clothing. It will debut early next year and include accessories, lingerie, swimwear and shoes.

Half of Kush

"We obviously waited on a big partnership like this for a long time because we've had so many different offers and we wanted to make sure that we had a huge say in the design and that our personalities would come through," Kim said.

Their personalities would come through? Does this mean all outfits inspired by Kim will resemble a robot?

These sisters own a pair of Dash clothing stores in California and Miami (though THG reporting proves the Florida establishment is rarely actually open for business) and also designed a fall line for Bebe this year.

The new collection will hit major retail stores in 17 countries in 2011 and be comprised of pieces that flatter all body types, including ugly one-shoulder dresses, jumpsuits, blazers and leggings.

"All three of us have similar bones, but we have different shapes and sizes," Khloe said. "I'm tall, Kim is curvy and Kourtney is petite - and we know how to dress up our best assets."

Translation: they show off their big breasts a lot.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Since we definitely aren't exposed to Kim, Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian enough on Khloe and Kourtney Take Miami, we'll soon be Keeping Up some more.

A new season of Keeping Up With the Kardashians premieres August 22.

Try to contain the excitement of finally learning what these secretive stars are up to. We've barely heard from them since the last season ended. Suspense!

The first episode will show newly-single Kim moving into her new home, but fighting with mother Kris Jenner after she throws a housewarming party.

Guests spill food all over Kim's expensive rugs. Gripping television.

Signing Sisters

KEEPING UP WITH THE KARDASHIANS SEASON THREE: GETTIN' KRUNK. That's not really what it will be subtitled of kourse, but a celebrity gossip site can dream.

In another scene, Kourtney - spoiler alert!!!!!! - moves out of the condo she shares with douchetastic BF Scott Disick and into Khloe and Lamar Odom's pad.

But the producer Kourtney decides she needs to move out once Khloe and Disick get into a screaming match and Khloe refuses to let him into her home.

Little sisters Kylie Jenner, who just debuted as a model, and Kendall Jenner, whose racy bikini pictures recently caused a stir - will have bigger roles as well.

The network says they're "no longer the quiet, young children they once were, and Bruce and Kris have their hands full with their youngest daughters' new career opportunities, first dates and not so lady-like behavior towards the paparazzi."

Kylie is 12 and Kendall is 14. Great values, E!

by Free Britney at . Comments

“Thank God I jerk off left-handed or I’d have no social life this week.” - Scott Disick

To say Kourtney Kardashian's baby daddy is a loser would be an understatement, but it appears our fair heroine finally wised up to this truth last night.

Read on to see what the poor THG intern stuck watching his antics on reality TV thought of last night's installment on Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami:

Finally, it was the episode we’ve all been waiting for. The “Douche-pocalyse” (thank you How I Met Your Mother). Scott Disick done lost his marbles, ya’ll.

Okay so Kourtney wises up and realizes Scott’s back to his old tricks and drinking and partying too much. She and Kim chat about this while on their friend Loren’s yacht, which is gorgeous by the way. When they return home, they notice their apartment smells like weed and Kourtney confronts Scott.

Kourt, Scott and Mason: One sweet, happy family.

In his effed up state, he grabs Kourtney tightly by the wrist (none of this is filmed) and she slaps him across the face. She then runs out, grabs Kim and Mason and they head back to Loren’s for safety. Meanwhile, Scott is left to his own devices with only the producers and cameramen to supervise.

He punches the mirror, injuring his hand and is taken to the hospital

This is the realest I’ve seen this show get. 

There’s no way that was made up. Everyone knows Scott is crazy, but you can tell just by the filming that this wasn’t fake. The cameramen had to call the producers to decide how to deal with Scott. Kourtney and Kim were visibly scared, and it was altogether a very messed up situation. This is just so sad for Mason.

The next day, Scott apologizes profusely and ends up getting surgery on his hand. Kourtney decides that although she wants to be there for his surgery, she needs to do what’s best for her and Mason.

Scott Disick: The monster, devilish boyfriend from hell.

On the random flip side of this episode, Kim Kardashian is still upset about her breakup with Reggie. She brings it up out of nowhere and it’s not even well transitioned by the producers. She wants to find a mate who will accept her for who she is.

Don’t we all? Anyway, there’s nothing better to cheer a gal up then have a Maserati flown in directly for her!

By the way, it’s such an obvious ploy to keep having Jonathan Cheban pop up on this show. He’s Kim’s best friend, not Kourtney’s or Khloe’s. Clearly, this was a setup by E! to help plug their next reality show, The Spin Crowd.

But enough about him, Khloe is back next week and she comes with a very angry visitor. Oh snap, Scott is about to endure the wrath of Kris Jenner. Amen.

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Earlier this week, Kourtney Kardashian told People magazine that Scott Disick is a great father and "obviously not a monster."

But the latest In Touch Weekly cover story aims to disagree with this statement and shed light on just how shady little Mason Dash's daddy really is - and this goes far beyond a supposed penchant for sangria.

With Kourtney and Scott having moved to The Hamptons, a source says Kourtney (and reality show viewers, naturally) may soon see what kind of a monster this man truly can be.

Asked about Disick's past in the area, especially the New York pals with which he associated, an insider revealed:

“He was worse than anyone knows. Scott and all his close friends were in this fake ‘gang’ called the Scummers. They would do all these really awful things together.

"When he was hooking up with a girl in bed, his friends would be in the closet, videotaping what was going on. Sometimes, his friends would jump out of the closet. He’d try to let them join in.”

In other words: Scott Disick is a second coming of Ray J? Haven't the Kardashians made it clear they welcome this kind of behavior? They do have their entire empire to thank for it, after all.

Kourtney Kardashian Biography

Kourtney Kardashian Photo Kourtney Kardashian is the least known of the older Kardashian sisters. She's probably the best looking, though. Kourtney has never made... More »
Born
Birthplace
Los Angeles, California
Full Name
Kourtney Mary Kardashian
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