Hmmm... aren't these poses eerily similar to those of Carmen Electra nude and Megan Fox nude? Is this really the best you've got, Kim?
You'll be seeing a lot more of Kim Kardashian in the future.
We already know she'll be going bare in December's Playboy.
Then, there's the uncut version of the Ray J sex tape, prominently featuring Kim's naked, moaning body.
Now, we're sad to report that E! Entertainment has picked up a second season of Keeping Up With the Kardashians. Since its debut in October, the show has been the top-rated Sunday night program among women 18 to 34.
"The buzz surrounding the series is huge, and viewers have clearly fallen for the Kardashians," said Lisa Berger, executive VP, original programming and series development, E!.
Really, people? You've fallen for this family, yet haven't fully embraced a show like Friday Night Lights? For shame.
Tomorrow we're gonna get up and f-ck again.
- Ray J, to close the preview for Kim Kardashian Superstar 2
Yes, folks, you read the above quote and attribution correctly.
Those soothing, alluring words of Ray J are part of the uncut, unedited, unclothed version of the original Kim Kardashian sex tape.
Vivid Entertainment just released the following statement regarding the follow-up to the now-infamous sex tape, Kim Kardashian Superstar:
The uncut version of Kim Kardashian Superstar runs over 100 minutes and features over an hour of never-before-seen footage. A trailer on the site promises added sex scenes and candid footage of Hollywood socialite Kardashian and her then-boyfriend, ex-child actor and hip-hop artist Ray J.
The revamped website also includes a scandalous voicemail message from Kim to Ray J recorded just after Kardashian found out about the release of the sex tape.
The company has most likely released this video in response to the forthcoming Amy Fisher sex tape. Which do you think will sell better?
We hope Kim Kardashian is using an extra large pen in the photo below.
How else will her signature fit across her gigantic backside?
In this Kim Kardashian picture, Kim Kardashian is signing another Kim Kardashian picture. Follow all that?
Put your video cameras away, guys.
Kim Kardashian is out of the sex tape game.
"My step-dad [Olympic medalist and Keeping Up with the Kardashians costar Bruce Jenner] wouldn't talk to me for three weeks," Kardashian told Playboy about the video she made with Ray J.
"The stress that I know it put on my mom and my step-dad, just the whole family. If my dad were here to witness all of that, I don't even know what I'd do. It's just not worth it, basically."
Hear that Jennifer Toof? Amy Fisher? Did you ever think of your family while you were getting railed on screen?
Looks like Britney Spears does something aside from party, ignore Sean Preston and Jayden James and go to Starbucks.
The awful mother also watches sex tapes.
How else to explain her view of Kim Kardashian? According to celebrity gossip newspaper The Sun, a friend of Britney's (Sam Lufti? Alli Sims?) quoted Spears as saying the following:
"I really love Kim's butt, skin and hair. Kim is a real women. A real horny beast."
Ray J would agree. As would Reggie Bush and Nick Cannon.
Sounds to us like Sean Avery and Mary-Kate Olsen have competition for hottest new couple in Hollywood.
What do you think? Should Kim and Britney get together?
Kim Kardashian is seen here celebrating her 27th birthday with a pair of K-named sisters.
We're not sure which is Khloe... or Kendall... Or Kourtney. The idiotic, self-absorbed mother, Kris, is probably around here somewhere, too.
Those not in attendance at the party - and not merely because their names don't begin with K - were Ray J and former best friend of Kim, Paris Hilton.
It's safe to assume, though, that Kalie Machado was invited. Probably Kim Porter and the Krispy Kreme donut chain, too.
As previously reported, you won't see Kim Kardashian naked in the December issue of Playboy.
What will you see in this supposedly classy pictorial? For an indication, here's a look at the cover:
We understand why guys wanna stare at Kim Kardashian naked.
But, seriously, can people stop tuning in to the new reality show, Keeping Up with the Kardashians? The show was the highest-rated series premiere for the E! network since the 2005 premiere of The Girls Next Door.
And at least that featured the possibility of seeing Holly Madison nude or someone famous at the Playboy Mansion.
One million viewers watched the October 14 opening episode, almost as many people as activities we'd prefer doing instead of watching this nonsense. Such as painting our toe nails with a glue gun.
Like many other reality shows featuring supposedly sexy women, such as A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila and The Pussycat Dolls Present, Keeping Up with the Kardashians did particularly well with women 18-34.
Anyone care to tell us why?
In the least surprising news item since Britney Spears lost custody of her children, Kim Kardashian will be posing in the December issue of Playboy.
We'll be sure to have these mostly nude pictures for you once the publication hits newsstands. In the meantime, here's a sneak peak at the photo shoot.
An Anna Friel nude photo? Surprising. A Kim Kardashian nude photo? Par for this socialite's course.