by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian turned 31 on Friday and celebrated quietly with friends and family members, choosing to remain out of the spotlight and actually turn down a sponsorship opportunity for once in her life.

JUST KIDDING! Kim used the birthday as a way to make money off Marquee Nightclub in Las Vegas, as she was joined there Saturday night by Kris Humphries, Kris Jenner, Khloe Kardashian, Lamar Odom and and former Dancing with the Stars partner Mark Ballas.

Kardashians in Vegas
  • Near Khlomar Kiss
  • Kim and a Reporter
  • Kim and Kris in Vegas
  • Mark Ballas and Kris Jenner
  • Khloe and Lamar on the Red Carpet

The group first dined at Italian eatery LAVO before walking the red carpet of the proceeding event, at which Jenner said of the occasion:

"I feel like she's still my 5-year-old little girl with pigtails. I get very emotional when it's their birthdays. You know I feel so close to them but the time is going by so fast."

Continue Reading...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian just showed us.

A day after she turned 31 and we mocked this reality star for scarcely accomplishing anything in life that didn't rely on her large boobs and marketing-savvy mother, Kardashian has landed a major movie role.

Kim Kardashian Birthday Pic

She will play one of the leads in The Marriage Counselor, Deadline reports, the next project written and directed by Tyler Perry. It is based on a play by the same name and centers around a twist on The Wedding Planner:

Jurnee Smollett will portray a marriage counselor who excels in her job, but not in her relationship. Kardashian will take on the role of this character's friend, Ava. The movie starts shooting next week in Atlanta.

Perry, of course, has grown into one of the most successful and influential men in Hollywood. His films (Why Did I Get Maried?, Madea's Family Reunion) typically cater to African-Americans, making Kim a natural fit. She knows all the ins and outs - ins and outs, ins and, oh yes yes, outs - of that community.

[Photo: Pacific Coast News]

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian turns 31 today, an event that has caused us to stop and consider all this woman has accomplished.

Who is she? How did she get here? What occupation would you even assign to her other than... professional celebrity?

It's Kim!

We were thinking of honoring Kim with a list of her best movies. But she doesn't act. Best songs? Doesn't sing. (She REALLY doesn't sing.) Most inspirational speeches? She's more wooden than a Christmas ornament.

So the THG staff has racked our brains and come up with the following accomplishments in order to celebrate this monumental birthday. Vote now on which is the most awe-inspiring and leave a comment below if we forgot any...

 

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

In what should clearly be considered a national holiday - nay, an international holiday! - Kim Kardashian turns 31 today.

This set of large breasts recently returned from Dubai, and ran straight into a tabloid deluge of divorce rumors. Are she and husband Kris Humphries on the outs? Is this simply planted fodder for her upcoming reality show? And did you even know Kim was married? The ceremony was kept very much on the down low.

It's been another incredible year for Kardashian, as she's expanded her empire and yet somehow remained less charismatic than ever. That's an impressive feat and it currently, tragically places Kim as the leading contender for THG Celebrity of the Year. Check back in December for those rankings and click through the following tabloid montage in honor of this birthday girl now...

  • THE END?!?
  • Konfirmed Split?
  • Kim Kardashian on Life & Style
  • Baby Time for Kim?
  • Already Miserable
  • Defending Their Love
  • Kim Kardashian Wedding Dress
  • Wedding Secrets!!!
  • Boring Kim Kover
  • Kim Kardashian Wedding Cover
  • Kim Kardashian Caught Cheating?!
  • Kim Kardashian Tabloid Cover
  • Kardashians Kover
  • Kim Kardashian People Magazine Cover
  • Tormented by Their Weight!

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries may be married, but new tabloid stories report these two are living totally separate lives. Case in point:

Kim traveled to Dubai last weekend - and pocketed $1 million while teasing a future hotel in the area - while Kris partied up a storm at three different New York City clubs.

Moreover, season two of Kourtney & Kim Take New York will need a storyline beyond this couple simply being content, and Life & Style claims to have scooped it...

  • Konfirmed Split?
  • THE END?!?

Look for Kris to clash with Kim's best friend, Jonathan Cheban, on the upcoming E! series, which kicks off next month. A show insider teases that Humphries will address his wife on the program and say:

You have to choose, him or me.

"Kim's mapping out 2012, including holidays, and Kris isn't a part of it," a source claims. "Any itineraries for the future don't include Kris very much. That's not a good sign."

It is if Kim is looking for her own spin-off. Back in That Ass: Kim K. Takes Cali anyone?

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian is totally in touch with the common man.

First, the professional celebrity got married in a multi-million dollar ceremony and now she's hanging out in Dubai, where the reality star told The Wall Street Journal today that she'd love to open a "hotel in Dubai and design all the different rooms and floors."

Kim Kardashian in Dubai

And why does Kim want to expand her empire to the United Arab Emirates? For the same reason she televised her wedding, of course: for her fans.

“I like to pay attention to what my fan base is really asking for, whether it’s hair and makeup, clothing brands... everything I think will be successful here," she said.

Amen, Kim. Your fan base is absolutely asking for a hotel in Dubai, a place 99.999999% - those who never sold rights to a sex tape for millions - could never afford.

[Photo: WENN.com]

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian is reportedly miserable in her marriage.

According to the latest issue of reputable supermarket tabloid Life & Style, the reality star - who will take on NYC again next month, as previewed HERE - believes she moved too quickly with Kris Humphries and recently said to a friend:

"I didn't know marriage was going to be so hard."

Speaking of hard, Ray J once videotaped himself and Kim... nevermind. Too easy.

Kim Kardashian on Life & Style

Another pal of Kim's tells the magazine that Kim doesn't think she's "ready for the commitment" that comes with being a wife, which goes along with what THG readers have been saying for months.

They don't see this union lasting long, as evidenced by the following poll results. Vote now and make your voice heard: How long will the marriage between Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries last?

 

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

As if the recent Yankees' ousting from the American League Playoffs were not enough, now New York must suffer through this confirmation:

Kourtney Kardashian and Kim Kardashian are preparing to take the city once more, as E! debuted the official season two trailer for this scripted series last night. It features the talent-free sisters landing on a roof via helicopter, greeted by Kris Humphries and Scott Disick in tuxedos.

Make plans for the fall right now, Big Apples citizens. These people arrive next month...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian is nothing if not giving of herself to Ray J on camera in order to get famous and make lots of money.

In the latest issue of InStyle Australia, the reality star is asked why she televised her wedding to Kris Humphries and she gives a simple, totally believable answer: she did it for us, people.

  • InStyle Australia Kover Girl
  • Kim Kardashian in InStyle Australia

"We took weeks to decide if we were going to film it or not," Kim lies her giant ass off tells the magazine. "But I felt like my fans - everyone that has gone on this journey with me, seeing different relationships that I've been in - would feel cheated if I didn't film it. It was something that Kris and I were okay with, and the beauty of it is we get to edit it. It [will be] great to look back at that and see this time in our lives."

That sure will be a nice feeling. We're guessing the phoniest woman in Hollywood also won't mind looking back at the number of zeroes on the checks she earned from this completely selfless act.

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

In one of the not remotely staged clips airing this Monday on the E!'s Kim’s Fairytale Wedding special, Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries try to enjoy a casual meal as a couple in this for money love.

But the paparazzi are abundant, making it seriously hard for Kim and Kris to spend quality time with their own cameraman and prompting the NBA power forward to propose a solution:

"Maybe you should just move to Minnesota with me. We could move into my little house on the lake, we could just start popping out babies.”

Of course, Kim doesn't react well to this idea because she'd be leaving her family. No, not Khloe, Kourtney, Kendall and Kylie. The guys from OK! Weekly and In Touch who pay most of her bills...