by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries may be married, but new tabloid stories report these two are living totally separate lives. Case in point:

Kim traveled to Dubai last weekend - and pocketed $1 million while teasing a future hotel in the area - while Kris partied up a storm at three different New York City clubs.

Moreover, season two of Kourtney & Kim Take New York will need a storyline beyond this couple simply being content, and Life & Style claims to have scooped it...

  • Konfirmed Split?
  • THE END?!?

Look for Kris to clash with Kim's best friend, Jonathan Cheban, on the upcoming E! series, which kicks off next month. A show insider teases that Humphries will address his wife on the program and say:

You have to choose, him or me.

"Kim's mapping out 2012, including holidays, and Kris isn't a part of it," a source claims. "Any itineraries for the future don't include Kris very much. That's not a good sign."

It is if Kim is looking for her own spin-off. Back in That Ass: Kim K. Takes Cali anyone?

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian is totally in touch with the common man.

First, the professional celebrity got married in a multi-million dollar ceremony and now she's hanging out in Dubai, where the reality star told The Wall Street Journal today that she'd love to open a "hotel in Dubai and design all the different rooms and floors."

Kim Kardashian in Dubai

And why does Kim want to expand her empire to the United Arab Emirates? For the same reason she televised her wedding, of course: for her fans.

“I like to pay attention to what my fan base is really asking for, whether it’s hair and makeup, clothing brands... everything I think will be successful here," she said.

Amen, Kim. Your fan base is absolutely asking for a hotel in Dubai, a place 99.999999% - those who never sold rights to a sex tape for millions - could never afford.

[Photo: WENN.com]

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian is reportedly miserable in her marriage.

According to the latest issue of reputable supermarket tabloid Life & Style, the reality star - who will take on NYC again next month, as previewed HERE - believes she moved too quickly with Kris Humphries and recently said to a friend:

"I didn't know marriage was going to be so hard."

Speaking of hard, Ray J once videotaped himself and Kim... nevermind. Too easy.

Kim Kardashian on Life & Style

Another pal of Kim's tells the magazine that Kim doesn't think she's "ready for the commitment" that comes with being a wife, which goes along with what THG readers have been saying for months.

They don't see this union lasting long, as evidenced by the following poll results. Vote now and make your voice heard: How long will the marriage between Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries last?

 

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

As if the recent Yankees' ousting from the American League Playoffs were not enough, now New York must suffer through this confirmation:

Kourtney Kardashian and Kim Kardashian are preparing to take the city once more, as E! debuted the official season two trailer for this scripted series last night. It features the talent-free sisters landing on a roof via helicopter, greeted by Kris Humphries and Scott Disick in tuxedos.

Make plans for the fall right now, Big Apples citizens. These people arrive next month...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Kim Kardashian is nothing if not giving of herself to Ray J on camera in order to get famous and make lots of money.

In the latest issue of InStyle Australia, the reality star is asked why she televised her wedding to Kris Humphries and she gives a simple, totally believable answer: she did it for us, people.

  • InStyle Australia Kover Girl
  • Kim Kardashian in InStyle Australia

"We took weeks to decide if we were going to film it or not," Kim lies her giant ass off tells the magazine. "But I felt like my fans - everyone that has gone on this journey with me, seeing different relationships that I've been in - would feel cheated if I didn't film it. It was something that Kris and I were okay with, and the beauty of it is we get to edit it. It [will be] great to look back at that and see this time in our lives."

That sure will be a nice feeling. We're guessing the phoniest woman in Hollywood also won't mind looking back at the number of zeroes on the checks she earned from this completely selfless act.

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

In one of the not remotely staged clips airing this Monday on the E!'s Kim’s Fairytale Wedding special, Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries try to enjoy a casual meal as a couple in this for money love.

But the paparazzi are abundant, making it seriously hard for Kim and Kris to spend quality time with their own cameraman and prompting the NBA power forward to propose a solution:

"Maybe you should just move to Minnesota with me. We could move into my little house on the lake, we could just start popping out babies.”

Of course, Kim doesn't react well to this idea because she'd be leaving her family. No, not Khloe, Kourtney, Kendall and Kylie. The guys from OK! Weekly and In Touch who pay most of her bills...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Yes, they still do.

On an episode of Ellen that airs today - check our local listings! - Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries renew their nearly two-month old wedding vows.

A Pretend Wedding

We'd typically make endless fun of such a ridiculous cry for more attention, but DeGeneres officiated this pretend ceremony and cracked us up when she advised Kim to repeat after her:

“I take Kris to be my husband and co-star, to love and honor you to always put you first - or at least above Khloe, but below Kourtney!”

Of course, Kim then had to go ahead and ruin everything by being a total liar once again. Asked what she'd change about her and her man's big day, Kardashian said she'd "elope." Right. Does ANYone believe that? We have about $17 million reasons not to.

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

The most annoying celebrity on the planet is late, folks. For her next red carpet appearance? No.

“She was supposed to get her period and didn’t," a source close to Kim Kardashian (VERY close to Kim Kardashian, apparently) tells OK! Weekly.

Baby Time for Kim?

Of course, nowhere on this cover does it actually say Kim is pregnant, just that it's "baby time," a child is "on the way" and that the reality star is "showing already." If Kardashian were actually knocked up, the Internet would have exploded hours ago.

“Kim always thought she’d have several kids by age 30, so in her mind she’s behind schedule," an insider tells the tabloid. “Kim’s been going through all the K names. She even has a baby-name book and looks up the meaning of each one.”

Considering the family into which this kid will be born, permit us a suggestion: klusterfuck. Kim, you can call us for the meaning of that one.

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Parade Magazine has published a poll, the results of which prove a point even more obvious than Casey Anthony's guilt:

Kim Kardashian is the world's most annoying celebrity.

Another Red Carpet Appearance

The former sex tape star and current red carpet poser took home 29 percent of the vote, with the publication writing of Kardashian: "Famous for being famous, Kim, in particular, has been inescapable, with her recent wedding and honeymoon reported just about everywhere."

Kim narrowly edged out Charlie Sheen (27 percent) in the voting, with Snooki finishing in third at 21 percent.

We've added a couple contenders below and will now pose the same question to readers: Who is the world's most annoying celebrity?

 

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Scott Disick has a very large penis.

This fact has been confirmed by more than just his baby mama, Kourtney Kardashian, as Kim Kardashian also chimed in this week during an interview with Jane Radio, saying of Disick's penchant for walking around naked:

"Honestly, it's way too much. He has to start wearing some tighty-whities."

Well Hung

Great. Now we can't stop staring at Scott Disick's crotch.

But that would deprive the family of an impressive showcase, Kourtney argued, because her man's unit is "like an elephant's trunk."

Whatever, Khloe replied. Disick is really just "trying to compete" with her husband ,Lakers power forward Lamar Odom, who apparently plays big both in the bedroom and in the paint.

We'll have more on Scott Disick's penis size when further news breaks.

[Photo: WENN.com]