Kevin Federline

It's official. The wait is over and the US Weekly clock (which reached 78 days plus) can be retired. Britney and K-Fed were finally photographed together today as the one who wears the pants in the relationship apparently let the white trash, aspiring rapper out of the basement. Probably reluctantly. The guy stinks! Here's the image:

Good Lord. The fact that little Sean Preston is wearing a Sean P. jersey renders a comment unnecessary. Can someone call the Department of Health & Human Services?

Kevin Federline isn't feeling so secure lately.

The wannabe rap star has been banished to the basement by wife Britney Spears as marital relations with between the two remaining chilly. As a result, Federline is reportedly worried about what's in store for him down the line.

With the relationship in shambles, Federline is going to great lengths to preserve the lifestyle of white trash mooch to which he become accustomed.

According to the Sun, a British newspaper, he's been spotted in a Malibu mall collecting numerous credit card applications, in hopes of accumulating massive amounts of debt and planning for the future in his own sick way.

"He realized without Britney he has hardly any money coming in to sustain his flash lifestyle," says the Sun source. "He figures Britney will pick up the bill anyway when the divorce comes through because they will have to split everything, including debts."

The Gossip feels comfortable speaking for most of America when is says this loser needs to get dumped (and neutered) ASAP. Look at poor little Sean P. and his beautiful mother. They need a stable influence. Someone who will be there for them, through thick and thin, not put them on the fast track to an endless payday loan cycle.

Brit, if you're reading this, you gotta drop it like it's hot! It being K-Fed!

Are Mr. & Mrs. Federline headed for divorce court? According to Kevin's friends, he and Britney Spears are still married. But for how long?

One friend, decked out in baggy pants and sunglasses (and probably a hat tilted sideways), says recent rumors of the couple's split are false.

"Everything you read in the tabloids about their relationship is fabricated. They're still together," the source said.

Others close to the Federlines said in interviews that divorce talk is off base, though none would agree to officially go on the record with a quote.

Reports out of the UK last week said that Spears signed preliminary divorce papers, allegedly after consulting with lawyers about splitting from Federline.

A source told Britain's News of the World newspaper that this is "a very stressful time" for Britney and that "she is serious about it… and knows she has to get things moving."

Spears has been at the center of speculation for months as her marriage is clearly on the rocks, and has been pretty much since the birth of son Sean Preston late last year. The singer, who is pregnant again, recently lashed out at Federline on her website, posting a picture of herself posing with a rude hand gesture.

The photo appeared under a poem entitled "Remembrance Of Who I Am," which is very likely aimed at her 28-year old backup dancer/aspiring rapper/WT spouse. The verse, believed to be written by Spears, asks "How do you stand sleeping at night," and goes on to describe how "manipulated," tied down and "swallowed" she feels.

This news is, indeed, hard to swallow. Not unlike Federline himself. Hopefully Britney can let out some frustrations at the gym this week, where she is reportedly spending a lot of time in preparation for a new CD.