Keira Knightley

Actress Keira Knightley has accepted a 3,000-pound (6,000 dollar, 4,460 euro) settlement of her libel claim against London's Daily Mail over a story suggesting she was responsible for the death of an anorexic teen.

Much as we love making skinny jokes and constant cracks about Keira Knightley's weight, or lack thereof (snap!) we have to admit that's a ridiculous claim.

It would be like blaming Lily Allen every time some girl gives blow jobs on a school playground or holding Lindsay Lohan responsible for every DUI in Southern California.

Keira Knightley also said the story "falsely suggested" that she suffered from eating disorders.

We're just going to take a pass on that one.

Kate Wilson, representing Associated Newspapers, the publisher of the Daily Mail, told a court Thursday that Knightley was not responsible for a death, and that Knightley "does not have an eating disorder, and has not misled the public."

In January, the Daily Mail published a Keira Knightley photo of her in a bikini with the headline: "If pictures like this one of Keira carried a health warning, my darling daughter might have lived."

Knightley's lawyer, Simon Smith, said the article could be interpreted to say that she was personally responsible for the death of Sophie Mazurek, 19, who had suffered from anorexia.

The Love Actually and comic porn star, who was not present in court, intends to donate the settlement to Beat, an eating disorder and mental illness charity.

Then, she and Rupert Friend plan on being photographed somewhere in London looking frightening and gaunt.

Yes. For once, that's a direct quote, and not our celebrity gossip staff writers trying to take any normal story and turn it into news about breasts.

Keira Knightley, who has long battled rumors of an eating disorder, says she wishes she could put on weight in the right places.

For starters, the Oscar-nominated actress, star of the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise, tells Britain's morning show GMTV, in an interview to air Monday:

From what we've seen of her as a porn comic star, she appears to be doing fine. But anyway.

Her ideal body? "I would love to have Monica Bellucci's figure," Knightley says of the Italian model and Matrix movies actress.

"I'm never going to get it. I'm naturally who I am."

Good thing Rupert Friend seems to like that.

Also in the interview she firmly dismisses the idea of ever getting any sort of plastic surgery to enhance her figure.

"'It's far too frightening. I couldn't."

That means that Keira Knightley has no plans to alter her healthy diet and exercise regime in the hopes of packing on the pounds.

"Yes, I'd say that I do like to keep fit, only because I like to be able to run around and do things," she says.

"I think that it would be great in the media if we saw a wider range of women of all ages, of all shapes and sizes."

This isn't the first time Knightley has publicly discussed her breasts - though the last time out, she was complaining that they were too big.

Not Victoria Beckham style, but still.

Last summer, with the release of King Arthur, she voiced her criticism over having her bosom digitally enhanced for the look of the movie poster. "Those things certainly weren't mine," FOX News quoted her as saying.

"[The studio marketing people] said, 'We want to make them slightly larger, and you'll get approval [of the photos].' And I was, like, 'OK, fine. I honestly don't give a s--t.'"

Nice.

Keira Knightley says she was "sick" and "devastated" when images of her appeared on celebrity gossip sites and in articles covering the ongoing "skinny celebrity" debate.

"When all that blew up, I felt terrible," the actress, 22, tells the British edition of Elle in its June issue.

"It appeared that I were promoting something when I absolutely was not. I am thin because that's what I am, and I was thinner at that point because of the work I do. Nothing else."

In January, when the photos were taken, Keira Knightley had just finished filming the final installment of the Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy, At World's End.

"I had lost weight," she says.

THG NOTE: Noooooooooo kidding.

"We were filming in searing temperatures and shooting fight scenes in which you were wearing a wetsuit underneath a load of corsets, fighting with heavy weights in the water. Can you imagine a more advanced cardio workout than that done hour after hour?"

In January, the Love Actually star sued Britain's Daily Mail tabloid for implying she lied about having anorexia.

"I was completely devastated by all that," she tells Elle about the anorexia rumors, adding that she even visited her doctor for advice on how to put on weight. "Whatever people say about my weight they are all wrong."

"He told me that for someone of my body type to get to a [European] size 12, I would have to eat a lot of sh!t food, stop exercising and drink loads," she says.

THG NOTE: In other words, become Britney Spears, circa 2004-2006.

"But I don't want to have to go 'round eating crap and being really unhealthy in order for people to stop having a go at me."

She's also learning to get past her own insecurities about her body. "I wish I had longer legs, but I haven't," says the porn comic babe. "What I have does its job. Ironically, I'm learning to become more happy with myself as a result of this."

Knightley, who dates actor Rupert Friend, her costar in 2005's Pride and Prejudice, and who looks like her Pirates costar Orlando Bloom, also says she may eventually quit acting:

"I can see myself in five years or whatever just giving the whole thing up. I made a decision recently that I want a life instead."

Nope! Just kidding! Keira Knightley was indeed out with her hunky man… but this is not a picture of her Pirates of the Caribbean co-star, Orlando Bloom.

It just looks like him. Are we wrong? No. This is Rupert Friend, though. Or should we call him Rupert Friend… With Benefits! Sorry. It's a slow day. 

Hope this clears up any confusion. Regardless of who the gaunt Keira Knightley is seen out and about with, there are a couple of constants:

• She and Rupert Friend are not engaged, despite rumors to the contrary.
• She is getting sick and tired of the damn skinny jokes celebrity gossip sites always make about her!
• We are still scarred by the image of her getting railed from behind by that squid dude in that bizarre porn comic strip we came across.

Keira Knightley is sick of jokes about her tiny figure.

But we wonder if she has a problem with being depicted nude in sex scenes with her Pirates of the Caribbean co-stars. It's safe to assume that boyfriend Rupert Friend does, at least.

We raise this issue now that Sinful Comics has somehow decided to run hardcore porn comics of Knightley getting it on with Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom ... not to mention the Davey Jones squid character.

It's obviously an attention-grabbing maneuver, one that has grabbed our attention. While a Kim Kardashian sex tape is to be expected, we didn't see Keira getting so hot and heavy with a set of tentacles coming.

Pun ... intended!

What's next, Shrek bending Princess Fiona over his ogre-sized counter tops?

We sincerely hope not.

Keira Knightley is pissed.

No, not because she got rejected for a part in some hot new movie. Or because she and Rupert Friend are on the rocks. They're not. At least as far as we know.

The twig-like actress is pissed because of all anorexia rumors and talk of her having any number of eating disorders. She just wishes we would get a life and talk about something - anything - other than how ghastly she looks.

Her look in this pic says it all...

Sorry, Keira. Until you, Mischa Barton and Kate Bosworth decide it's not all that sexy to resemble skeletons, T.H. Gossip will be here live, cracking jokes on the World Wide Web.

So there. After what you've done to Angelina Jolie, you deserve it.

Looking ghastly as ever, Keira Knightley somehow musters the strength needed for a shopping excursion in London over the weekend. Man, she looks so damn HOTTT - in that really gaunt, bulimic and spooky kind of way...

Come on, Rupert Friend. The girl needs to eat! That's your responsibility. Get on it. At least we know Brody Jenner would try to get some nutrients inside Keira (among other things).

She can file lawsuits all she wants - there's no doubt that the gal needs to put on a few pounds. And by a few, we mean like 15-20. She's starting to look like Nicole Richie.

Keira Knightley is really thin.

But she's willing to go to court in order to prove she doesn't have an eating disorder. The actress is suing a British tabloid, saying it implied she lied about having an eating disorder.

At issue is a Jan. 11 story in the Daily Mail about a teenage girl who died of anorexia. It was illustrated with a shot of Knightley on a beach in a bikini.

The Pirates of the Caribbean actress, has "publicly denied suggestions that she might be anorexic or have a similar eating disorder," her lawyer, Simon Smith, said in a statement.

He said that any legal action will reiterate that denial. It might also include a Kate Bosworth photo in order to prove how much smaller actresses can get.

Knightley will "argue that the Mail's article suggests that she has dishonestly sought to mislead the public about whether she has anorexia or similar eating disorder and will show that she does not have anorexia."

Last summer, at the Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest London premiere, the girlfriend of Rupert Friend emphatically denied that she suffers from anorexia. "I don't have it. I'm very sure I don't have it," she said.

She added that it's not something to take lightly because members of her family have suffered from it. We do agree. And hope stars such as Mischa Barton have a sense of humor when we mock them for their weight.

Putting rumors of their breakup to rest, Keira Knightley and Rupert Friend, her boyfriend of several months, bundle up for a dinner outing in London on Monday. See below: 

Nice to see they're still an item. Maybe rumors of their split can finally be put to rest. A few lingering questions are not ready to be put to rest, however:

• Why does Rupert Friend look like a serial murderer?
• Why has Rupert Friend not had his hair cut since 2003?
• How did Rupert Friend possibly land Keira Knightley?

First, there were reports that Keira Knightley and Rupert Friend were engaged. Then, they weren't. Now, we have no idea.

But we do have a couple of anonymous sources willing to talk about the relationship!

One pal (maybe it was Scarlet Johannson, they hang out a lot) said:

"Keira's a really loving girlfriend but she's so insanely busy with work ... She's done everything in her power to make Rupert feel important but he still complains that he doesn't get enough attention, and it's causing real friction."

Does that mean this couple will go the way of Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston?

Or is there still hope the pair will turn out like Prince William and Kate Middleton?

Another sources said Rupert has told pals he feels like the "fifth element," saying Keira puts family, friends, work and "everything else" before him.

The Hollywood Gossip says: suck it up, dude. You get to often make out with this beautiful star; we're left with nothing but Keira Knightley pictures.

Wanna trade spots?