by Nosy Neighbor at . Comments

The Real Housewives of New Jersey returns and "The Blonde Drops a Bombshell"…or did she? We break down the rumors and ridiculous set ups in THG's +/- recap!

The Biggest Tongue

The Housewives once again gave us bad singing and even worse fake meetings. It was hard to figure out which was more cringe worthy.

Let's start with Melissa Gorga's singing talent. Minus 50. Please God, I beg you, make all Housewives end their supposed musical careers.

Seriously. It's nothing but painful for both the audience and the professionals that Bravo pays to come in and critique them.

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by Nosy Neighbor at . Comments

The Real Housewives of New Jersey came up with "Zen Things I Hate About You." Just how long will this retreat last? We recap the zen and broken glass in our THG +/- review.

Melissa's Birthday Surprise

How long has this group been in Arizona?

Honestly, if I had paid big bucks to stay at this spa and had to put up with Richie and the double Joes by the pool I'd be pretty ticked off. Minus 15.

But that's nothing compared to watching Joe Gorga suck on his wife's toes for her birthday.

Minus 30. I'm not sure which was more disturbing, that or having Teresa Giudice give Melissa Gorga black lace peace sign panties for her birthday.

I doubt any amount of meditation will wipe that from my mind.

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by Nosy Neighbor at . Comments

Leave it to The Real Housewives of New Jersey to turn a "Horse Whisper to a Scream." 

Read on as we break down who among the women embraced their vulnerable side and who ended up looking like a horse's a$$ in THG's official +/- recap!

Not the Horse Whisperer

Jersey is still in the house at the Mirval Resort and Spa and it may never be the same again.

But psychic advisors and gong therapy aren't what Melissa envisioned for her birthday.  "I'm done. I want a f**king cocktail by the pool in a bikini." Plus 15. No one can say she's not a girl who knows what she want.

Everyone's still recovering from the ghost whisperer when they all head out to see a horse whisperer.  Funny thing is, Wyatt the equine therapist reads these Jersey housewives and their hubbies like the comic book characters they are. Plus 22.

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by Nosy Neighbor at . Comments

This week on The Real Housewives on New Jersey, we were shown a "Hair-Binger of Doom" as a six year old gets her own professional hair care line.

Yup, anything can happen in Jersey and we recap it all in our THG +/- review.

Pass the Hookah

I've lost count of the amount of products Teresa Guidice has out there but this one might just top the list. Now she's got a professional hair care line…and she's named it after her six year old.

Minus 20.  First off, I've never much liked Teresa's hair.  Second, don't you think her other kids might be a little ticked off that Milania's getting all the attention? Way to play favorites there Mom.

And is little Milania angling for her own show? Plus 8 because her parading around in a padded bra was disturbingly funny as was telling Tre to take her name off the product if she couldn't come to the launch party.

In reality it's just another Housewives money making scheme and with all the Guidice legal issues I'm sure their lawyers will take every penny they can get.

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by Nosy Neighbor at . Comments

The Real Housewives of New Jersey are "On Thin Guid-Ice" as the retreat continues. We recap the drunken hugs and apologies in our THG +/- review.

Dr. V score some points as she quickly reduces Joe Gorga and Teresa Guidice to sobbing puddles. Plus 12. That didn't take long at all.

Hug It Out

But I wouldn't expect tearful hugs from everyone.

The good doctor marches back downstairs for her next victim and assures them all that she's not murdering anyone upstairs.  I don't think some in that crowd would have a problem if she were.

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by Nosy Neighbor at . Comments

The Real Housewives of New Jersey brought us "Everything Is Coming Up Rosie" but is an intervention led by the hot headed cousin really what they need?

We recap both the good advice and the asinine in our THG +/- review.

Rosie's Happy Face

Joe Gorga drives home from the gym still muttering curses at Teresa under his breath.

I'm not sure what he's more upset about, being told he's pussy whipped or finding out that Melissa tweeted something unkind about his sister.

Maybe Melissa isn't the angel he thinks she is.

Melissa's still working on her book, because who doesn't need advice on marriage from a Real Housewife? Plus 10 for talking to her family beforehand about putting her father's philandering past in the book but I wonder if she would have done it anyway even if they objected.

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by Nosy Neighbor at . Comments

"It's My Party and I'll Fight if I Want To" shows that no The Real Housewives of New Jersey birthday party is complete without drama, even if the party is for a 12 year old.

We try and make sense of the lies and catty comments in our THG +/- review.

Gia & Teresa

Gia Giudice is turning 12. At 12 I think I had 10 kids at my party. Gia's parents rented a club for 100 people. Does anyone else get the feeling the girl is already smarter than both of her parents? 

Hopefully she doesn't inherit her mother's fashion sense. Purple zebra spandex. Minus 8. Even at the gym that should be unacceptable.

With her birthday looming Joe Giudice takes his little girl out for daddy / daughter time. When he started lecturing the pre-teen on spending more time with her family I groaned. Minus 10.

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