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Her parents aren't invited.

Us Weekly makes this stunning declaration on the cover of its new issue, which features an older photo of a happy Prince William and Kate Middleton on the cover.

The gist of the non-story: The Duchess will spend her very first Christmas weekend with her husband and the entire royal family at Queen Elizabeth's retreat.

Her parents have not been invited. Scandalous, right? Not really, as William will visit with Kate, Pippa Middleton and their parents before and after Christmas.

  • William and Kate Pic
  • Kate Middleton, Belly

Kate Middleton pregnancy rumors take a back seat ... for one week!

The princess will "quickly learn that this is not like any Christmas she has had," a royal source says, but is that any different from any newly-married woman or man?

In-laws. Can't live with 'em, pass the egg nog.

There are some challenges unique to Kate Middleton, however. The fashion icon is expected to change up to five times a day for formal meals, black-tie cocktail parties, church services and gift exchanges (novelty presents are encouraged).

She also has to hide her baby bump.

Just kidding. You didn't think we could go a whole article without a reference to the ongoing Kate Middleton pregnancy rumors, did you? We should hope not.

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Is Kate Middleton pregnant? Needless to say, we highly doubt it, but we've now read three different celebrity tabloid reports to that effect in as many days.

In this one, the Duchess collapsed no less!

The Star cover story, citing a "palace tattletale," says the mother-to-be and Prince William, who wed on April 29, are expecting, and she's had complications.

Kate Middleton Collapses!

An ambulance was called, if you believe the magazine, after William found his spouse of six months unconscious on the floor. The stock photo is so convincing.

Not surprisingly, almost no one believes the bombshells of the past week, which include In Touch matter-of-factly saying she's preggers and Us' more carefully worded story about Kate being "ready for baby" or some such nonsense.

A Buckingham Palace spokesman has called past tabloid reports "absurd" and "certainly not true," but you have to wonder what prompted this week's deluge.

It's not the first time Star made Kate Middleton pregnant. In June 2010, the magazine reported that she was expecting a baby ... before even getting engaged.

BTW, if the baby is a girl, the couple will name her Diana. Obvi.

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Kate Middleton is around six weeks pregnant with their first child, according to celebrity gossip magazine In Touch, citing a royal source that's allegedly well connected.

Is it true? We've heard it all before - quite recently in fact - so we say no. Especially since the palace specifically promised to break any such news first, with no leaks.

But hey, she sure is glowing and holding her belly a lot, so there's that:

A Royal Baby!

According to the insider (who has correctly revealed other "secrets," including their honeymoon location and the queen’s wedding gift), she is "definitely" pregnant.

That settles it then.

“Since before they even got married, it’s been made clear to William and Kate that having children should be their number-one priority,” the royal source reveals.

Queen Elizabeth II, in particular, has supposedly been dropping hints about wanting a great-grandchild - and an heir to the throne. Now she's supposedly "elated."

Even with Kate early in the first trimester, they’re said to have already started planning with nurseries in each of their three residences, and by picking names.

Now that their first born child will inherit the throne regardless of gender, Prince William, who was famously close to his mother, is said to be hoping for a girl.

Don't expect a baby at all in nine months, but that's a cute made-up anecdote. Nice to see fabricated Kate Middleton pregnancy stories are getting sappier.

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Rigorous private lessons on how to be royal.

Rumors about losing too much weight.

Scrutiny over when she'll have a baby.

Alleged kidnapping threats.

Kate Middleton has a lot on her plate these days, to be sure. But is Us' new cover featuring the Duchess trying to make her situation more alarming than it is?

Kate Middleton Under Pressure

Kate definitely has lost weight in the past year, but many brides do. And sure, people are probably waiting for her to get pregnant with a royal heir. But Kate is 29 and has been married less than six months. Is she really sweating it?

She's got plenty of time to raise a family and raise children. A girl's allowed to enjoy being married and getting acclimated to her new life for a bit.

Heck, if you believe Star magazine, she's already pregnant with twins. If her fake fertility is any indication, getting pregnant for real should be a breeze.

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Kate Middleton lived every girl's dream when she became a princess.

But, according to another tabloid report, that comes at a steep price.

As pressure to be perfect expands, Kate Middleton literally shrinks, Life & Style says, with the immense stress - from safety and kidnapping threats, to worrying about her husband and constantly being critiqued - getting to her.

REFUSING to Eat!

A supposed insider tells the tabloid the following:

"She dropped two dress sizes before the wedding and loved how it made her feel. She's showing no signs of slowing down, and the weight is just falling off of her."

"Friends are always trying to get Kate to eat something when they see her, but she just ignores them and refuses ... she changes the conversation and makes an excuse like she's eaten already or that she's not hungry."

Allegedly, sister Pippa Middleton has started calling her older sibling up to five times a day to check in on her and her eating habits, while William is also increasingly concerned about his beautiful wife's diet and stress.

Personally, we think both sisters look tremendous. They should never feel pressured to be thinner, and we hope they always know this. That's all.

What do you think? Is Kate Middleton too thin?

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Kate Middleton is anorexic and with child, according to Star.

That last part should tell you everything you need to know. By anorexic and pregnant, what the tabloid means is she is not pregnant and/or sickly.

Apparently sources close to the Duchess say that she's "gone from fit and toned to gaunt and bony" and the whole thing is just "horrifying." Gosh.

Anorexic, Pregnant

Dr. Fred Pescatore, who has no connection to her at all, notes that "Kate looks to weigh from 95 to 100 lbs. That makes her seriously underweight."

At 5'10", a weight of 100 pounds would put her BMI as "severely underweight" or, to put it another way, not able to function and possibly not alive.

So Kate Middleton is pregnant and dying. Thanks Star!

In reality, she's probably just thin. Not starving to be sexy or ready to collapse due to exhaustion or severe malnourishment at any given moment.

Nor is she carrying any future kings or queens. Although now that she's married and settling down, you have to wonder when she'll get pregnant.

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She's drop-dead gorgeous. She married the Prince of freaking Wales. The world has been riveted by every Kate Middleton fashion choice under the sun.

Despite all that, is the pressure of being in the public eye getting to the Duchess of Cambridge? A new tabloid report suggests that it certainly may be.

The 5-foot-10 princess was once a size 6, "but there's no way she's more than a size zero right now - that's extremely skinny," a friend tells Life & Style.

Some friend.

Kate Middleton: Too Skinny?

"Kate was pretty skinny on her wedding day, but now she's dropped another 7 to 10 pounds," another insider says, with no basis for that whatsoever.

The magazine claims that Kate barely touched her meal prepared by celebrity chef Giada De Laurentiis during their visit to America last week.

Even if that's true, which we doubt, it can't be easy to eat with thousands of people staring at you. Maybe give the girl a little bit of a break.

At least her husband is all over it, according to L&S.

Having lived through his mother's alleged eating disorders, "William's No. 1 priority in life is to ensure that Kate is happy and healthy."

Now that we believe. They're a sweet couple. What do you think, though? Has Kate Middleton lost weight, and is she looking too thin?

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This is a new one.

As the royal wedding excitement dissipates, you knew it'd only be a matter of time before people began speculating when Kate Middleton will get pregnant.

Well, apparently In Touch Weekly, claiming remarkably intimate knowledge of Kate Middleton's reproductive system, has answered that already: NEVER!

Kate's Baby Heartbreak!

BARREN? Tabloids make celebs pregnant a lot (see Aniston, Jen). But this is the first time we can recall a celebrity being made infertile. Seems kinda wrong, no?

A "royal doctor" supposedly spilled the beans. Can you imagine ANY doctor actually telling a celebrity news (term used loosely) magazine such information?

They wouldn't if they expected to practice medicine again. If this were true about Kate, it would be clear who knew, and that person would be disbarred.

Still, give ITW credit for making up original nonsense at least. They even covered the adoption fallback, too. Apparently Will and Kate can't do that either!

Rough news, three weeks into a marriage. Looks like it's on Pippa Middleton and/or Prince Harry to provide grandchildren for their respective families.

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Duchess of Cambridge Kate Middleton and her suddenly-famous younger sister Pippa may be best friends, but that doesn't mean they're unlike most siblings.

"There is a healthy competition between the two," royal watcher Katie Nicholl tells Us. "Certainly when it comes to looks, there is a little friendly rivalry."

Kate and Pippa Middleton also squabble over "weird things," says a family source. "You'd see them fight over who had the worst headache or period pain!"

Okay. We're all about Pippa and Kate, but that's just TMI.

Kate and Pippa Secrets!

While Kate married Prince William, Pippa grabbed headlines for her sexy, elegant style, her chemistry with Prince Harry and later, her racy photo scandal.

"She was the sister who sparkled," Nicholl said. "She's an extrovert compared to Kate."

At boarding school, "none of the guys noticed Kate," a source says, adding that when Kate Middleton went to St. Andrews in Scotland (where she met Prince William), Pippa frequently visited to mingle with her sister's noble new pals.

"She dated a couple of the St. Andrew's lads and tried to get in with a lot of William's friends," a source says. "She wasn't sleeping around, but she flirts."

WOW! Pippa Middleton, you amaze us. Just when you think you know someone ...

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Just two days to go until the wedding of the year. Nay, the century.

The celebrity gossip tabloids, like the rest of us, are riveted by the impending nuptials of Prince William and Kate Middleton, who will tie the knot Friday a.m.

The historical day will be dissected in great detail starting with the ceremony itself. Last week, Kate admitted she's a bundle of nerves just thinking about it.

When they enter Westminster Abbey, however, William and Kate's clear heads and full hearts will help calm those fears - and block out the massive spectacle.

  • Wedding of the Year
  • Royal Wedding Fever!

Old William and Kate photos, but cute ones!

William's brother and best man, Harry, admitted that their mother would be on the boys' minds on April 29, as they stand in the location of her 1997 funeral.

"I hope she would be so very, very proud that the big day has come upon him," the 26-year-old Harry said this week. "We all thought it was never going to happen."

It's happening, all right, and THG will be here to break it down, vow by vow, Friday morning as the wedding of the millennium takes place before the world.

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