by Free Britney at . Comments

Jon Gosselin is not a fan of his ex-wife, or Dancing with the Stars. He's not just miffed about her horrible dancing either - dude wants custody of his kids.

Saying that Dancing with the Stars is damaging his children thanks to the super bitch from hell joining the cast, Jon wants them under his control, ASAP.

Plus money.

The douchebag will be seeking primary custody as well as spousal support in court, says Jon's new lawyer, former assistant U.S. Attorney Anthony F. List.

Unmoved by the fact that she had a makeshift dance studio installed at home, he calls Kate "an absentee mom," which he says is no surprise to anyone.

Right. Because Jon is a model citizen and parent, by contrast.

  • Kate G. Hair
  • Jon G. Contemplates

The brief truce between Jon and Kate is apparently over.

List expects to use her casting on Dancing with the Stars (which she may be voted off tonight) as proof that Kate does not spend "quality time with the eight kids."

The attorney also thinks Jon is getting hosed in the child support department, claiming "$20,000 a month is ridiculous." Needless to say, he wants that changed.

In addition to primary custody, List says he's considering asking the judge to reverse the support obligation and make Kate pay Jon. That should go over well.

Team Jon did not specify any specific figures, but it looks like he's gearing up for a full assault. So much for the newly single Jon wishing Kate luck last month.

Is Kate really an absentee mom for going on the show, or is Jon just angling for more leverage? Is it actually good that she's on DWTS to support the kids financially?

Most importantly: Who sucks more?


by Free Britney at . Comments

Kate Gosselin proved she's as good at being a diva as she is terrible at actual dancing, but she somehow survived to see another week on Dancing with the Stars

While Kate butted heads with partner Tony Dovolani this past week, wait until you hear what they have planned for next Monday's episode of the competition.

A Jon-and-Kate-themed dance.

We are totally serious. Tony will be channeling Jon Gosselin as Kate portrays herself in next week's storytelling assignment. Just let that sink in for a moment:

They will take her marriage implosion, which made celebrity news headlines for a year, into a high-step dance routine. And you think you've heard everything.

Dressed For Success

If Jon Gosselin makes a cameo next week, we'll retire.

"It's my story over the past two years," Kate said. "We're very, very excited." It will be very "Dramatic," promises Kate. To which Tony replies, "Lots of drama."

And ratings, most likely. Can Julianne Hough play Hailey Glassman?

Just to make sure we got the point, Kate reiterated, this time with a little more emphasis, that this is gonna be a dance with "Oh my gosh, so much drama."

As much as we could decry this shark-jumping, contrived nonsense as a low point in reality TV history, it's actually a pretty genius move on ABC's part since:

  • People love Kate and don't want to see her leave the show
  • People love watching Kate humiliate herself on the show

Either way, she's on the show. Punch her ticket to the finals now.

by Free Britney at . Comments

She is far from the most seasoned contender on Dancing with the Stars, but Kate Gosselin is already popular with the cast and has tons of fans pulling for her.

Even Jon Gosselin says he's on Team Kate.

Now that's saying something. The previous time he was aligned with that woman, dude ended up with eight kids, a midlife crisis at 32 and fat child support payments.

"Congratulations to Kate for joining the new season of DWTS. I am thrilled for her. She has my support and vote," the douchebag wrote on Twitter, diplomatically.

Apparently in a peacemaking mood (Morgan Christie must have put out), Jon added, "Here is to 2010 for new beginnings and leaving the past mistakes in 2009."

  • Kate Rehearsing
  • Getting Smoked

Amazing these two didn't work out.

That was really nice of Jon, but if Hailey Glassman has taught us anything, it's that his Johnson is two inches long you can't always take what he says at face value.

A source close to the infamous father says that "Jon's extremely angry because doing Dancing with the Stars will keep [Kate] away from their children for days."

Moreover, "she still won't let him have extra custody ... nannies will watch them instead." At least that leaves more time for a Jon Gosselin nude Playgirl shoot.

Jon's rep insisted that the source is bogus, and that no matter what people say, "He's happy for her. She's part of his family and he supports her 100 percent."

Who sucks more?


Jon Gosselin Biography

Proof of Cheating Jon Gosselin is the father of a lot of children. He's got his big break as one half of the couple in the title of the show Jon and Kate... More »
Full Name
Jon Gosselin
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