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Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are returning to reality TV in a new special chronicling their rise to - and fall from - fame. You can thank / hate E! for this.

After Shock: Heidi & Spencer will feature the former stars of The Hills discussing their rise to celebrity status and their life outside the spotlight these days.

As you can expect, that transition was tough for the plastic pair.

Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag on CBB

"The second [The Hills] ended, in 2010, the jig's up. Now you're irrelevant. Your 15 minutes are up," he says, lamenting the duo's fall from grace (or whatever).

Lacking any Kim Kardashian sex tape-style magic to keep them in the news, and having been phased out of The Hills even before it ended, Speidi went dark.

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Three years after going under the knife to get size-F breast implants (along with nine other plastic surgeries in one day), Heidi Montag decided to undo it.

In the new issue of Us Weekly, she's opening up about the surgery and showing off her brand-new C-cup implants, which do look way more human-like.

Lauren Conrad is still prettier, apparently, because Us put her on the Hills retrospective cover, despite the Heidi Montag plastic surgery angle. Sorry, Heidi.

The Hills Us Weekly Cover

Posing seaside in Santa Barbara, Calif., the blonde unveiled her smaller, more-manageable breasts, which she had redone in a six-hour procedure.

Prior to that, she had suffered a number of health problems, all related to her size-F implants, which she says weighed "about three pounds each."

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Former reality star Heidi Montag recently had her comically fake F-cup breasts reduced to a D-cup. And with that, her latest 15 minutes of fame have expired.

Not before she allowed ET to film it, though. Thank goodness.

Amongst many other plastic surgeries she's had performed, Montag had a second breast augmentation a few years ago to increase to size F cup.

Although she enjoyed the look (for some reason) her watermelon-sized implants caused her serious health issues and forced her to rethink the decision.

"I do regret getting the implants," she told ET. "My new doctor was like, 'You never should've been allowed by the doctor to get implants this big."

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Heidi Montag, who once underwent a staggering 10 plastic surgery procedures in one day before swearing off it, is going back under the knife once more.

This time it's to undo some of the previous damage, however.

Heidi Montag and Brooke Anderson

The Hills star, 27, has been complaining about her size F breasts for years, and with good reason. Most people likely don't even know there is a size F.

An upcoming breast reduction will take them down to a D.

“I just wanna, like, rip them off!” Heidi Montag tells ET.

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Heidi Montag and Jen Bunney are still friends and still hanging out, despite The Hills having long since wrapped. Even more incredibly? They look less plastic.

"Having fun :) @heidipratt," Bunney captioned the picture below:

Heidi Montag and Jen Bunney Photo

The girl who underwent 10 plastic surgery procedures in a single day, looks happier and healthier than we've seen her in years in little to no makeup.

For Heidi Montag, this is as good as she's looked since ... ever.

Jen Bunney appeared in several episodes of Laguna Beach as Lauren Conrad's friend before transitioning to a supporting, occasional role on The Hills

Then along came Spencer Pratt and kind of ruined everything.

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Years before any Miley Cyrus Twerking or Farrah Abraham porn, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt of The Hills were the talk of the celebrity gossip world.

From Heidi Montag's 10 plastic surgery procedures in one day to Spencer Pratt's crystal worshipping, the pair always aimed to shock and surprise.

The couple made headlines this week by unveiling a new show they've dubbed SpeidiShow, which they've called an attempt to reinvent reality TV.

Just one problem (or godsend): The show doesn't actually exist.

"SpeidiShow is just as real as [people's] image of us," Spencer Pratt said of his latest hoax. "People have tried little Twitter tricks, but this is bigger."

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It wasn't long ago when Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag were staples of THG. Every day, the pair made headlines for ... whatever it is Speidi would do.

Okay, those days are long gone, as is their fortune.

Nevertheless, they're still together! And partying with a professional photographer documenting the whole thing! Some things in life truly do never change.

In Las Vegas for Spencer Pratt's 30th birthday, Heidi Montag jumped out of a huge cake with her huge fake boobs, looking just as absurd as we remember.

Feels like 2007 all over again ...

  • Spencer Pratt, Heidi Montag Photograph
  • Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag Photograph

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Having come in second place behind Ryan Clark on Celebrity Big Brother (UK), Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are continuing to open up about their experience.

The gruesome twosome, who said they only feigned being asses for the sake of ratings, now admit they feared for their lives during the competition!

Montag and Pratt Talking

Long out of sight and out of mind as far as the American public is concerned, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt re-emerged on UK reality TV this winter.

While the Big Brother house tends to be unpredictable, Spencer and Heidi both admit that they felt as if their lives were in danger during the competition!

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Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt say they were - wait ... just wait for it ... only pretending to be mean to win votes and cash in on Celebrity Big Brother (UK).

It almost worked. On Friday night, Speidi came second in the reality TV competition, leaving the house in England to a barrage of boos from the crowd.

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt on Celebrity Big Brother

Rylan Clark won the title, edging out Heidi and Spencer, who says backstabbing and general brutal gameplay was the whole reason they signed on.

“They brought us in to be Speidi and stir it up,” Spencer Pratt said. “I feel like a cartoon character. My talent for some odd reason is being an a**hole.”

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Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag are causing quite a stir on the UK's Celebrity Big Brother. The gruesome twosome is receiving death threats, apparently.

"The American couple have become the most reviled contestants in the history of the show," one insider says, to the surprise of zero Americans.

Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag on CBB

The death threats are serious enough that "Big Brother chiefs will ensure they get close protection from minders when they eventually exit the house."

According to UK celeb gossip sources, the dastardly duo know as Speidi "mock other contestants, argue with them and refuse to join in tasks to get rewards."

Sounds about right.

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