by Free Britney at . Comments

Lies. Ambien. Text message impersonation. Golf club-wielding insanity.

The Daily Beast cites close Elin Woods sources in piecing together the clearest picture yet of the Tiger Woods scandal, a.k.a. the most expensive car crash in history.

Derek Lowe Mug Shot

These sources' details mesh with the more credible accounts of the post-Thanksgiving altercation to date, and we've excerpted some scandalous details here:

During the run-up to Thanksgiving, Tiger gave Elin advance warning that the National Enquirer was about to run a story claiming he had an affair with Rachel Uchitel.

Woods swore the story was false and that he had only met Uchitel 1-2 times at social outings. The day before Thanksgiving, Tiger convinced Uchitel to talk to Elin.

Rachel Uchitel spoke to her for half an hour, and Elin believed that the relationship was platonic - until she read the Enquirer's specifics of the purported affair.

Sources say Elin Woods busted Rachel Uchitel via text message.

That evening, the two argued. Tiger decided to end the bickeringby taking Ambien and going to sleep (he often took Ambien to help him sleep - and bang Uchitel).

After Woods fell asleep, Elin looked through his phone, found texts to Uchitel (under her real name) and discovered one saying “You are the only one I’ve loved.”

Shortly after 1 a.m. in Florida, Elin began texting Rachel Uchitel, pretending to be Tiger, writing “I miss you,” and asking, “When are we seeing each other again?”

Uchitel texted back, surprised that Woods was awake. Elin felt this response indicated that the two of them spoke earlier that night, before Tiger took his Ambien.

At that point, Elin Woods called Uchitel, who answered thinking it was Tiger. Elin said something approximating, “I knew it was you.” Uchitel’s shocked reply: “Oh f--k.”

She immediately hung up.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Rachel Uchitel is either a serial liar or a serial mistress.

In October, she claimed to be having an affair with Bones star David Boreanaz. The celebrity gossip world reported on the story and then shrugged.

No offense to Boreanaz, but he doesn't get our juice flowing.

If Uchitel's latest story is true, however, she'll receive the proper attention she clearly craves. The National Enquirer reports that Uchitel has been sleeping with Tiger Woods.

  • Eye of the Tiger Woods
  • Uchitel Pic

Forget the iconic Tiger Woods fist pump, Rachel Uchitel says the golfer has been pumping her full of his nine-inch iron.

A friend of Rachel's supposedly told the unreliable magazine:

"Rachel told me, ‘I’m having an affair with Tiger Woods. We’re in love!’ She even read me text messages Tiger sent her that said ‘I love you, babe.'"

"'It’s always going to be just you and me.' They were constantly sexting."

Tiger's lawyer denies the charges levied by the tabloid, but does actually tell the Enquirer's print edition that his client met Rachel Uchitel at a club.

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Elin Nordegren Biography

Elin N. Pic Elin Nordegren was the wife of Tiger Woods. Correction: Elin Nordegren was the gorgeous wife of Tiger Woods. She recently won a lawsuit... More »
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Elin Nordegren
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