by Free Britney at

There are some noteworthy celebrity sex tapes out there, to be sure. Just not a whole lot that you'd actually want to ... you know, sit down and watch.

It's not altogether surprising that many stars of our most notorious celebrity sex tapes are predominantly (or only) famous for those very sex tapes.

If you have a lot else going for you, you don't need to ... you know.

Anyway, this being April Fools Day, there's a lot of BS out there, from Ariana Grande nude hoaxes to unsubstantiated pregnancies, breakups and marriages.

You may read some crazy stuff today, but very little of it is real.

That shouldn't stop you from dreaming, however. Here are 13 celebrity sex tapes you only wish would mysteriously leak on the Internet one sexy day ...

13 Celebrity Sex Tapes That Only Exist in Your Dreams
Beloved by men and women alike, approachable and yet otherwordly, genuine, talented and personable as well as beautiful, Jennifer Lawrence is uniquely lusted after.
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Jennifer Lawrence

1. Jennifer Lawrence

Beloved by men and women alike, approachable and yet otherwordly, genuine, talented and personable as well as beautiful, Jennifer Lawrence is uniquely lusted after.


Channing Tatum

2. Channing Tatum

You watched Magic Mike, which is basically halfway there, ladies. Don't act so shocked.


Mila Kunis

3. Mila Kunis

Mila Kunis frequently tops guys' wish lists for such things.


Ian Somerhalder

4. Ian Somerhalder

One has to assume there would be biting involved.


Kate Upton

5. Kate Upton

Kate Upton will never make a sex tape, but here's an astonishing naked GIF at least. You are so very welcome, fellas.


Charlie Sheen

6. Charlie Sheen

Not only is Charlie Sheen engaged to a porn star, he is the Warlock. Who wouldn't watch his drug-fueled freak-fest, just to see what levels of depraved lunacy would ensue?


Katy Perry

7. Katy Perry

She once rated herself a 10/10 in bed. Just sayin'.


Rihanna

8. Rihanna

She and Drake would totally pay random strippers to perform in the background of their romp.


Brangelina

9. Brangelina

A Brangelina sex tape would be eye-popping for more reasons than their obvious good looks and chemistry. The tabloids would collectively flip out over the new material they just got for Jennifer Aniston articles.


Kate Middleton

10. Kate Middleton

Two words: ROYAL SCANDAL.


Lena Dunham

11. Lena Dunham

Every episode of HBO's Girls is pretty much a Lena Dunham sex tape. Imagine the kind of f--ked up s--t she does in the privacy of her own home.


Ryan Gosling

12. Ryan Gosling

We are required by the laws of the Internet to include Ryan Gosling on any list of this nature.


Miley Cyrus

13. Miley Cyrus

This one feels almost inevitable.


Kim Kardashian (Bonus)

14. Kim Kardashian (Bonus)

Okay, there's already a Kim Kardashian sex tape, with Ray J. But can you imagine if the sequel co-starring Kanye hit the web today? The Internet as we know it would break. Full-on implode.


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by Free Britney at

An alleged Charlie Sheen sex tape is being shopped around, and its bizarre link to the recent Nic Cage burglary scandal has been unearthed as well.

Also, a man who was supposed to be a key witness in that case is missing.

  • Charlie Sheen Crazy
  • Cage, Nic

It's hard to keep straight, but handyman Ricardo Orozco is currently on trial for allegedly breaking into the home of Christina Fulton, Cage's baby mama.

He is accused of stealing computers and memorabilia, which allegedly includes Nicolas Cage sex photos ... and somehow, a Charlie Sheen video.

A detective testified in court Thursday that one of the items taken was a Charlie Sheen video on one of the stolen computers. Sources say it's a sex tape.

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by Hilton Hater at

In truly shocking news for someone with his reputation, Charlie Sheen recently starred in a sex tape alongside a pair of prostitutes.

The goal of the exercise, according to one of the call girls involved, was for the actor to anchor the "pilot" episode of what he hoped would become his very own adult film franchise, ideally titled "Charlie's Devils."

"Charlie and I were having this great project and he was talking about performing in front of the camera," a woman named Felony tells Radar Online in the video posted here, adding that Sheen wanted a videotape of himself trying out various positions.

The actor's favorite? All of them, Felony says. And where is the tape? "Charlie's got it," the promiscuous interview subject reveals.

Come on, Charlie, you wonder why we care about your antics?!? You wanted to start his own porn franchise... named Charlie's Devils?!?

We can do better than that, can't we, THGers? Perhaps Chuck Me Sideways? A Sex Ma-Sheen? Charlie Sheen Productions Presents: A 72-Hour Coke-Binge and Porn Film? Sound off now with your best ideas!

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