Camille Grammer

The Camille Grammer vs. Kelsey Grammer feud has officially entered it's I'm-rubber-and-you're-glue phase.

Last night, the Real Housewife of Beverly Hills said her ex-husband has an unimpressive penis. Now, Kelsey's fourth wife, Kayte Walsh - who has remained silent amidst all other barbs and slights against her man - has responded. She told TMZ this afternoon:

"Perhaps the fault lies not so much with the member in question but rather with the inspiration at hand."

That's likely the most poetic way we've ever heard one woman refer to another as ugly. It also begs the obvious question: Which of Kelsey's conquests would do the most for your member?

With Camille Grammer and Kelsey Grammer locked in a battle over their children, the reality star has decided to take the former couple's feud down to a childlike level.

First, in a promo for season two of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Camille references her ex and says: "big hands, big feet, big disappointment."

Asked to elaborate in the following video, Grammer responds: "I had that for 13 years, unfortunately." How mature and classy. Isn't it nice to know Camille's kids will be able to fire up this interview any time they want?

Camille Grammer Disses Kelsey Grammer's Penis

Forget Mayor of New York City. Camille Grammer says her ex-husband has his political sights set much higher.

"He told me when I first met him that he wanted to run for president. This has been a lifelong dream for him," the reality star told The New York Post this week.

But if the actor really does run for office, he won't be able to count on at least a few votes.

"He's got to learn how to run a family first before he can run a city," Kyle Richards told People, referring to Kelsey's ongoing custody struggle with Camille.

Added Lisa Vanderpump: "He's such a good example of great morals and family value. I'll be voting for him with a kick up the ass."

Would you vote for Kelsey Grammer for President of the United States?

They're all coming back.

Following months of casting rumors regarding The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills - Will Camille Grammer leave due to her ongoing custody battle? Will Kim Richards' drinking cause her to take a step back? - Bravo has confirmed that all six cast members have signed on for season two, as evidenced by this new promotional photo:

Moreover, the show is introducing two new spoiled stars, both billed as friends of the cast: welcome, Brandi Glanville and Dana Wilkey!

Both appear in the following season two promo, which also highlights the main storylines coming our way in September: Taylor Armstrong's divorce, Camille's battle with Kelsey Grammer, Kim and Kyle working on their relationship... and many other developments that are in no way, shape or form scripted.

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A truce has been called among the Grammers.

Former spouses Camille and Kelsey have agreed to a temporary deal surrounding custody of their kids, which has been an ongoing point of contention.

The agreement indicates when Kelsey gets custody and where. Camille will apparently have both kids more often, but the deal was to his satisfaction and will accommodate his schedule, which is much busier.

Previous reports indicated that Kelsey wanted his son to be with him in Chicago, but not his daughter. Under the deal, the two will not be separated.

Kelsey also claimed Camille smells like beef jerky, but later blamed that on someone hacking his email, so you never really know with these two.

In any event, despite the deal, bigger discussions of money and permanent custody are still on the table and haven’t been amicably resolved yet.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills are coming down hard on Kelsey Grammer.

With Camille locked in a custody battle with her ex - rumors claim Kelsey actually wants to split his kids up - Adrienne Maloof, Lisa Vanderpump and Kyle Richards have all come to their cast member's defense. By bashing the heck out of the former sitcom star.

"She might be [dating again] after this weekend," Maloof told E! News on Sunday at the Critics' Choice Television Awards. "She's presenting with me at the NHL Awards. I thought, 'Oh, hot hockey players!'"

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Camille Grammer has terrible news for her young kids and for fans of irresponsible parenting: neither Mason, 9, nor Jude, 6, will appear on the new season of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

"My ex wouldn't sign the release, so you are not going to see my children," Camille told E! News. "Mason really wanted to be a part of the show."

The little guy probably wants ice cream for dinner every night two, you nitwit. It's your job to make decisions in his best interest.

Camille and Kelsey Grammer are in the middle of an ugly custody battle. How is the former holding up?

"I've lost 16 pounds since the beginning," she says. "It's going through the stress of Kelsey leaving and then shooting a reality show at the same time. So it's a combo."

Yeah, that's tough. Too bad there's nothing she can do about the reality show part.

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Camille Grammer apparently smells like beef jerky. Very good to know, Kelsey ... or whichever "third party" got into his email (so he claims) and wrote that tidbit.

Seriously, this happened.

An email from his account was fired off this week with the phrase, "Camille smells like beef jerkey [sic]. Goodnight," but Kelsey disavows all knowledge of it.

The email went out to his friends and contacts Wednesday a.m. Kelsey, who's waging a child custody war with Camille Grammer, promptly sent a follow-up.

The actor explained that the rancid message came from an old shared account, and that "third parties" may still have access to it. He did not say who.

He cryptically said, "May I suggest that it is 'they' who owe you an apology."

Whatever that means. Grammer added that he is shutting down the account, while his rep corroborated the story (Kelsey's side of it, of course).

Anybody out there buying the old hacking excuse? Seems fishy. Maybe this is just a really unusual way to generate PR for Kelsey's new show?

Or maybe he's telling the truth. If we were a "third party" with access to Kelsey's email (or Soulja Boy's Facebook), we would probably f*%k with it.

[Photo: WENN.com]

Kelsey Grammer is in for a long custody battle with his ex. He admitted as much at the Tony Awards last night, sounding confident about his chances.

“It’s going to be a long drawn out thing and it’ll be turgid and unpleasant I’m sure, but not on my side," the actor told OK! Weekly.

Will Kelsey Grammer still be smiling when his custody battle plays out?

No matter how it plays out, Kelsey couldn't say enough good things about his new wife, Kayte Walsh, who accompanied him to the event.

"She’s just amazing. She’s extraordinary. A lovely human being," Grammer said. "I’m as blessed as I’ve ever been in my life.”

[Photo: WENN.com]

Appearing on Ryan Seacrest's radio program this morning, Camille Grammer confirmed the startling, confounding news:

In April, ex-husband Kelsey Grammer filed for custody of only one of the couple's children. Without going into detail, Camille said the actor did, indeed, plan to split up the children.

How is the Real Housewife handling the legal battle now?

"I'm really trying to reach out to him, and I think it's really important for us to be cordial to one another to raise our children properly," Camille said. "And it's really, for me, it's all about our kids, and what's good for them, and stability, and to know that they're loved. Hopefully we'll work toward some type of agreement on this."

Grammer better hope so. Otherwise, he spot on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills could be in jeopardy.

[Photo: Pacific Coast News]