by Free Britney at . Comments

Just when you think walking train wreck Britney Spears can't look any more disheveled and thrown together… she raises the bar yet again. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think Britney used to be hot at one point in time. Who is this person? Back! BACK! Away with you! Go back to the Wal-Mart from whence thou came and give us back our Brit!

The even scarier thing, of course, is that these pics have nothing on the video clip we found yesterday. Dear God! Can someone call the Department of Health & Human Services? A trip to the hospital for "exhaustion" can only be a few weeks away.

Britney Crotch Shot: Censored

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Earlier today we brought you a recently discovered video clip of Britney Spears looking like an absolute drugged-up, white trash train wreck. In fairness to the Gossip's favorite and most talked-about celebrity, we're now posting a few pictures taken over the weekend, in which the pregnant Brit went shopping and looked downright normal.

On the left, you'll see the singer, seven months pregnant with her second child with deadbeat loser husband Kevin Federline. Not sure when Britney became a Red Sox fan, but 50 percent of the Gossip staff wholeheartedly approves. Woo!

Britney Spears' Ring?

In the center, you'll see Britney with younger sister Jamie Lynn Spears, 15, and a pair of dudes. The guy in the back looks to be Perry, better known as Brit's Manny. The chump in front? No freaking clue, but we could definitely take him in a fight.

Finally, on the right is Britney and Jamie Lynn's mother, Lynne Spears, talking to Perry Manny and carrying Britney's almost one-year-old son, Sean Preston. Cute! Click to enlarge!

by Free Britney at . Comments

The Britney Spears Meltdown Saga has reached a new level with the release of a home movie shot by her husband, Kevin Federline, at an undetermined point in time. Go to TMZ.com and watch it if you haven't seen it already. The three-minute clip features Britney in full trailer park gear, chowing down on some take out, belching furiously, waxing philosophically on Back to the Future (we are not making this up) and rambling incoherently.

Britney Spears Walks Through Airport

No idea how this telling moment found its way onto the Internet, or why the dumbass filmed it in the first place, but it has to be seen to be believed, even if you have been following Spears' rapidly deteriorating life in the past few months.

It really looks as if she is high on a mixture of substances and is about to seriously tweak out. Kind of funny, and more than a little frightening.

This girl needs to get professional help, and fast. Leave us a comment below! Sign our petition to Free Britney!

by Free Britney at . Comments

The amazing Britney Spears and her gold-digging, dead-weight spouse plan to launch a new magazine, numerous online sources report.

Hottest Britney Spears Picture

Spears wants to publish "the real deal" about their lives and relate other celebrity news, too. Speaking to Steppin' Out magazine, Kevin Federline explained their idea for The Real Deal.

"It's not just us. Everybody has been lied about in the tabloids. Everybody has false truths and false images and false stuff perceived on them. Maybe not as much as me and my wife get. But everybody has it. I think a magazine like that, would attract all the stars. I think they would want to go to that magazine and tell the truth! I'm not kidding. This is something I want to do for real," Federline stated.

Sounds like a good plan, but the Gossip has come up with a few alternate names should the Federline family opt for something other than The Real Deal:

  • Spears Sun-Sentintel
  • Deadbeat Daily Dispatch
  • The Trailer Trash Times
  • Nymph & Narc News

Thoughts? Anyway, K-Fed, who recently traveled to Las Vegas for work (what an odd concept that must be for the freeloading jackass), was filming his "Lose Control" video in Sin City while wife Britney Spears hung out and his mom partied with Ron Jeremy. Seriously.

On Thursday night, Federline, Spears and their 10-month old son, poor Sean Preston, hit the restaurant Tao at the Venetian with a group of friends.

Federline, who will perform "Lose Control" at the Teen Choice Awards on August 20, stayed to celebrate after the video wrapped and Spears, who is pregnant again and expecting the couple's second child this fall, was there to support her deadbeat man.

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Britney Spears is going through some hard times these days, and is being bashed by just about everyone. But this one surprised even the Gossip.

A new hip-hop/reggae song entitled "Black Princess" is creating quite a stir on the Internet. It refers to the pregnant Britney as ugly, as opposed to India Arie, who is apparently so sweet and lovely.

Brit Squats

Sure, her life is a bit of a train wreck and her husband leaves something to be desired… but to step up and make a statement like that seems a bit off base. Here's how Bookman, the "artist" behind "Black Princess," has explained the reason why he is so anti-Britney:

"I was just watching VH1 most beautiful people and I was not seeing any of the women that I consider beautiful such as Venus Williams and India Arie. Then they showed Britney Spears and I almost fell out my chair, because I thought there is no way Britney is as beautiful or talented as India Arie, so I just came up with the song right there," he said.

Bookman's song is either really good, or really controversial â€" it's one of the most downloaded from iTunes and Yahoo music services as of now, and is generating a lot of buzz, in the form of both praise and criticism. Any publicity is good publicity, they say â€" and Britney isn't the only star the song mentions in unflattering terms. Kobe Bryant, Charles Barley, Tiger Woods, O.J. Simpson and Anna Kournikova are also referenced.

The Gossip has done some digging and uncovered the full lyrics to the song. Here are the official lyrics to "Black Princess," by Bookman:

Man a Kunta Kinte, don't call me Toby

You can't accuse me of raping white girls like Kobe

India Arie, you are so sweet and lovely

I want you to kiss and hug me

Britney Spears you are ugly.

CHORUS:

What would I do without my Black Princess

I would live celibate, I would die celibate

Cause all the girls I met

And all the girls I sex

There was none like my African Princess (twice)

To chase white women that's not me bra

I might marry one to get my visa

But I wont turn white woman breeder

Cause I don't want my child to be no zebra

That's why I wont catch no Jungle fever

And I don't want no girl that looks like Reba

She must be cute like the Queen of Sheba

She must be fit to be an African leader

And in Jah she must be a believer

In Jah she must be a beliver

CHORUS:

I was chillin at my job where I met a blonde bimbo

She whispered in my ears that she wants Mandingo

Because I turn her on with my Jamaican lingo

Plus am flexible enough for the Jamaican limbo

She heard it through the grapevine

I give girls a great time

Because I have a great whine

Sweeter than the grape wine

She say meet her at break time

She know that will be long enough

Because she heard am long enough

And she could see am strong enough

Black and African enough

I practice how to slam enough

Her boyfriend only nyam enough

Good thing I was man enough

To know I couldn't bang the slut

A nuff Black woman mi want…

CHORUS:

I could never take vanilla and leave chocolate alone

Oh no, am not Karl Malone

I don't go crazy for some bitch name Barbie

I leave that for OJ and Charles Barkley

Am from the place of water and wood

100% real African wood

Am not diluted like Tiger Woods

I need a real Black woman to make me feel good

So keep Kournikova and keep Martina

Just give me Venus and the sweet Serena

Serena, Serena, I love the batty rider wha you eena

Wow, such artistic brilliance. Let us be the first to say that this individual should be honored not only as a Grammy winner, but as a poet laureate. So deep. So moving. So utterly profound. Not. Who the fâ€"k is Bookman, and where does he get off taking cheap shots at our girl? First Janice Dickinson and now this. Jealous, bitter individuals apparently have nothing better to do than tarnish Britney's image in a pathetic attempt to feel better about their own lives. You suck, Bookman. We despise you. You are not loved in this world. Accept it and leave Brit be.

We could launch a 10-page rebuttal here, but all we can muster the strength to do right now is post a picture of Britney Spears that no sane human would describe as ugly. Enjoy it.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Our counterparts at hotonlinenews.com are reporting that Britney Spears is not taking too kindly to the laziness of husband Kevin Federline. In fact, the pop star recently axed a pool boy for hanging out with her deadbeat of a husband.

"I was hanging out a little bit. She came out screaming at Kevin for lying around, then looked at me like I was to blame," ex-employee Jon LaLane told In Touch Weekly.

Wal Mart Shopper

The next day, LaLane says he got a call from one of Spears' representatives, telling him not to report for work. Don't call us, we'll call you, Jon.

LaLane, son of the famed exercise guru Jack LaLane, and who is also in a band called BlowGun (far too easy to even waste time on a one-liner) says he and K-Fed (below) would talk music by the pool. That's probably a bad sign, if you think about it. The band is clearly not getting it done commercially if he's cleaning pools -- and Federline is not exactly the guy an aspiring performer should be bouncing ideas off of.

Golf Fiend

In any case, LaLane claims that pregnant Britney would get jealous when her hubby talked to anyone else. Britney, whose Manny made headlines for awhile, apparently is allowed to talk to whoever she wants. We now know who wears the pants in this house, not surprisingly.

"She wants Kevin on a leash. She fires everybody. I figured, 'Why not me?' I just didn't expect her to be so mean. It's a revolving door there. She's not the nice person everyone thinks she is," LaLane said.

Oh, get over yourself. She fired you, move on. Go clean Lindsay Lohan's pool, Jon -- the Gossip is pretty sure there's a "special" treat in it for you.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Everything appears to be alright, but our friends at hollyscoop.com are reporting that the incomparable Britney Spears was terrified recently by a false labor scare. The 24-year-old singer, who is now very pregnant (seven months in, to be exact) with her second child, went into false labor last week and was rushed to hospital.

"Britney started cramping. She had a real scare," a friend who must not care about Britney's privacy at all told In Touch Weekly.

Sad Britney Photo

Britney is now out of hospital but has been warned by doctors that she may have to spend the last month of the pregnancy in bed.

She has also been told to improve her diet, which has never been the healthiest. Guess that means she has to cut down on those pork rinds. Oh, and no more Taco Bell, you hear!

Spears has admitted to junk food cravings since becoming pregnant with poor Sean Preston's will-be-sibling, but has now hired a nutritionist to make sure she stays in shape as her pregnancy winds down.

"She wasn't eating enough vegetables. But Britney is now determined to enjoy the rest of her pregnancy and stay healthy after she gives birth," the friend added.

It is not the first time Britney and her deadbeat husband, Kevin Federline, have been faced with a pregnancy scare. When the pop star was pregnant with Sean Preston, she feared she had suffered a miscarriage after four months.

Get well, Britney. We kid (a lot), but we love you.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Britney Spears‘ sexy schoolgirl antics in her debut single, "Baby One More Time," were groundbreaking. Some teenage males might even call them life-altering. But they weren't enough to top one of Britney's musical heroes, Madonna, on MTV UK's list of the 100 Videos That Broke the Rules.

Britney Spears and Madonna

To call Madonna's 1989 video for "Like a Prayer" controversial might be the biggest understatement in music history. The video, after all, featured the scantily-clad singer kissing a black Christ-like figure against a backdrop of burning crosses. Yeah. Top that, Brit.

Madonna drew the ire of critics back then, but won "Like a Prayer" the top spot on MTV UK's recent list.

Britney came in at #2, while Michael Jackson's legendary 14-minute zombie epic "Thriller" moonwalks claimed the third spot. At #4? Madonna again, for her "Justify My Love" video, which was banned by MTV in 1990. Next in line? You guessed it. Madonna, with "Vogue."

MTV compiled the list by polling 10,000 viewers and will play the entire 100 videos as part of its 25th Anniversary on August 1. Hopefully Madonna and Britney can put aside their recent differences and come together in celebration of this honor. Maybe they can kiss. You know, to make up and stuff.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Much as you would love to imagine the words "Britney," "Spears," and "experimentation" coming together in magical ways, don't get your hopes up.

Britney, Sean

Mother extraordinaire Britney Spears says she loves experimenting -- but she means playing the role of personal style coordinator for 10-month-old son Sean Preston. The pregnant pop princess loves picking out a wide and interesting variety of clothes for Sean P. So much so that she is planning on launching a new clothing line specifically for babies.

The star says she is putting her downtime during pregnancy to good use (when she's not writing poetry, of course), and has been amusing herself endlessly with Sean Preston's wardrobe.

"Because I'm pregnant, I'm big, and I don't really want to get out that much," she said. "I go into his closet and just bleach everything! Preston's just like a rocker kid. Hopefully next year we'll have a fashion show, maybe at Disney World or something like that We'll have them onstage, and they'll have mini-guitars. Everyone needs a mini-guitar!"

Somebody please kill me now, or take me back to the days of yore.

One would think that Britney could use some of that downtime to outfit husband Kevin Federline in some new clothes as well, but who knows. Maybe she digs the circa-1992-wigger look. As for her experimenting with Sean Preston's attire, we think she has some work to do. Please see:

by Free Britney at . Comments

Think about it. Who else would The Gossip choose when officially unveiling its new Classic Celebrity Pictures feature?

For a person who's spent a mere 24 years upon this Earth, Britney Spears has been through a lot. She's been a teen temptress, a pop princess, walking paradox, and a global sex symbol. Now she's producing fewer songs, has her own reality show (the true sign of a has-been in training), is married to the most worthless dirtbag on the planet, acts like she's straight out of the trailer park, cranks out kids like it's her job, and exhibits some seriously weak maternal instincts.

Waxy Britney

In order words, she's been around long enough -- and become a big enough train wreck -- for some older pictures of her glory days to attain classic status.

Feast your eyes upon this pic, from Esquire. Then think about what might have been, had a man named K-Fed not entered her life. Sigh. At least he can't take away our memories.