It's all about balance.
That's what Bethenny Frankel learned on last night's season finale of her reality show, as both business and baby beckoned. As usual, a THG intern has reviewed the episode in depth, sharing her snark with readers below. Take it away!
I have to say that for a finale episode, this one was quasi-boring. A baby shower cake faux-disaster? Amateur football games on Montauk? Jason lathering sunscreen on Max? Bethenny’s much-hyped first trip away for work that we didn’t even get to see? Baby nurse Gina doling out post-baby sex advice? Yawnsville. However, I do love watching the new little family unit in action so that saved it from being a total dud.
I think the best moments are when Jason, Bethenny, Bryn, and Gina are hanging out around the apartment talking about whatever. I would prefer a whole show of that.
Tonight’s episode began with my second favorite gal from Real Housewives of New York City, Ramona, coming over to visit Bethenny and the new baby. Almost immediately the baby gets cranky and Bethenny hands her off to Gina. Gina rushes the baby into a secluded room. The women discuss having more than one baby as well as sex post-delivery.
Ramona is surprisingly tongue-tied as she talks about her own “relations” with Mario after she had daughter Avery. All in all, I like Ramona a whole lot better on the other show. Seeing her on Bethenny’s show is a weird experience - it feels like when you were little and you saw your teacher at the grocery store: startling, uncomfortable, and a teensy bit scary.
Though she just gave birth two episodes ago, Bethenny has already reclaimed her flat stomach. “Look at the body on her, Gina,” says Jason. He then adds, “I really thought at our age or your age it would be a mess.” Gina nods knowingly. Speaking of Gina, one random factoid we’ve learned about her is that she is no fan of men trying to get on their women right after they have babies. She’s sort of a combo baby nurse/anti-post-pregnancy sex cop.
The day of Bethenny’s baby shower has arrived. “I’m probably the first mom ever to have a baby shower with the baby already,” says Bethenny, verbalizing something we are all thinking. Of course poor, poor, poor Shawn is putting this little fiesta together.
The first order of business is carefully extracting the specially-ordered-from-Los-Angeles cake. “OMG! (Multiple explicatives). We have a caketastrophe!” gasps Shawn as he realizes the design on the cake is messed up. He has a look of true terror on his face as he frantically tries to fix it. This much fussed-over cake, by the way, is insanely small.
How many people is this supposed to feed? Or is it just a centerpiece? If it’s a centerpiece, then why does it have to be some extra-special cake flown in from Los Angeles? Such big confusion for such a little cake. But I digress.
Freaky NYC Housewife Alex is among the shower guests and surprises everyone by wearing a normal outfit. Though Bethenny states, “I’m hoping we can have a cocktail and discuss something that doesn’t involve diapers and boobies,” of course this sort of talk is inevitable. But then, like in every good Housewife show, the conversation moves to sex. “I’m not having sex and Jason is like a rabid animal. He’s gonna like mount me the second it starts,” Bethenny says in full listening zone of her mother-in-law.
The shower also involves manicures, pedicures, facials, massages, and other sorts of body treatments. Having arrived moments earlier, assistant Max is immediately splayed out on a massage table awaiting his turn. Bethenny is ticked that he went ahead of her shower guests. Despite being bitched out, Max is oblivious and still wants the massage.
After the shower, Bethenny is stressing about having to go to Chicago on a brief work trip. “It’s complete trauma and terror and I don’t want to go,” Bethenny says about leaving Bryn for the first time. As usual, Jason is totally supportive and wonderful. “We’ll be right here when you get back,” he says as he expertly pats the baby’s back. Gina also gives Bethenny a pep talk before she leaves. Lord knows if that baby is safe with anyone, it’s Gina.