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Monday's episode of The Hills started with LC and pals at beach BBQ thrown by Brody Jenner in Malibu. Once again, it's a tad annoying that we went in knowing he broke his finger during a football game on the beach. But it was, for the most part, entertaining.

The bash, of course, happened on the same weekend that Brody's quote-unquote publicist, Spencer Pratt, was asked by Heidi Montag to go meet her parents in Colorado.

Mostly Plastic

Brody was upset to hear this, and ripped Spencer for going, calling him "married guy" and saying that a true pal "wouldn't flake out on his homies." True dat, yo.

By and large, Spencer did a nice job with Heidi's folks, although we take serious issue with Heidi saying she always wanted a guy like her dad - and that she got that in Pratt. We found Heidi's dad to be a nice, normal guy, thus making this statement really confusing.

Later, Heidi tried at length to justify her love for Pratt, and Spencer himself was awkwardly thrust into the "heart-to-heart" talk with Mr. Montag. Somehow, the evil one utilized his Revenge of the Sith mind-control techniques to seem like a normal human.

Back at the party, Audrina Patridge was having a great time with boyfriend Justin-Bobby. For some reason, she was all about this guy. That is, until he started flirting with other girls, then ditched the event without telling anyone.

He even left Audrina's bike helmet at Brody's. Classy move.

Lauren Conrad then consoled Audrina Patridge after she miraculously realized what the rest of America already knew - that Justin-Bobby is an absolute waste of space.

In the immortal words of LC: "Homeboy wore combat boots ... to the beach!"

Amen. By far the cutest part of the season so far came when a teary-eyed LC and Audrina Patridge began talking about love and boys in front of the fire - having had a few too many drinks at the party - while trading the requisite hugs and supportive comments.

Awwwww. For one scene, The Hills felt like actual reality again. Cute girls drinking too much, talking about feelings and saying how much they love each other after one of them is spurned by a guy! Who hasn't seen this 50 times at parties!?

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For Lauren Conrad, it's apparently tough to find a BFF and roommate with a boyfriend who doesn't suck. And turn her into a mother hen, of sorts.

The beautiful star of The Hills found herself in a somewhat familiar area Monday night, playing the third wheel as her roommate dated a new "hot" guy.

Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag at Area

Only this time it's not Heidi Montag, but new BFF, Audrina Patridge, and on-again boyfriend, Justin... whose friends, of course, call him Bobby. Thus, Justin-Bobby.

What's J-B's actual name? We have no idea. Nor would we care, except that Audrina Patridge is apparently too clueless to give this assbag the boot.

After a standoffish meeting with Lauren - the guy showcased his belching skillz and displayed the maturity of an eight-year-old in an upscale eatery (no joke) - Conrad will likely have less-nice, more descriptive nicknames for Justin-Bobby.

Mumbling, hiding under a hood and telling Lauren Conrad bluntly that he doesn't care about her opinion, Justin-Bobby is shaping up to be a worthy competitor for Spencer.

The scheming Spencer Pratt does a much better job of making himself compelling to watch, though - even the haters have to give him that.

Despite a desire not to hurt Lauren, who told her she should pull the plug, Audrina nonetheless found herself back with the motorcycle-riding bad boy by the episode's end.

As Lauren Conrad herself knows, sometimes the bad boys are the hardest to let go of. But will LC give Audrina flak for giving Justin-Bobby this second chance?

In other dysfunctional relationship news, the newly engaged Heidi Montag showed off her fake engagement ring at work, then struggled to set the ground rules for cohabitation. Her methods of choice were passive-agressive - and entertaining!

After Spencer Pratt "surprised" his lovely lover with vintage '80s arcade games and a graffiti-splashed living room wall, and didn't listen to her pleas for even a little input as to home decor, Heidi gave him a taste of his own medicine.

Spencer came home to find Heidi paint-rolling over his "artwork," offering him his very own "surprise" - a clean, plain, off-white wall!

Pratt fumed as Montag explained that if they plan to make this "engagement thing" work, they're going to have to make decisions together. Spencer was seething as he agreed as he stared forlornly at his once glorious wall. In a moment, though, he picked up a roller and finished off Heidi's project.

Is Spencer now thinking pal Brody Jenner may have been right when he said marriage was just an institution for dumb guys who can't get otherwise laid?

Who knows. But next week on The Hills, Spencer ditches a Brody BBQ to meet Heidi's parents in Colorado, while Brody and LC commiserate over their lost friendships. Meanwhile, Audrina encounters drama with Justin-Bobby - drama everyone in America saw coming but her!

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"I literally feel, like, one of my friends... died."
- LC

After all this time, and hype, the much-anticipated season three premiere of MTV's The Hills didn't disappoint. For the most part.

Fake Girl

Monday's debut sure didn't waste any time bringing viewers inside the epic war between Lauren Conrad and Heidi Montag, while properly (and blatantly) introducing each side's supporters.

Whitney Port - now a full-time employee and Lauren's supervisor at Teen Vogue - and Audrina Partridge are so on Team LC, while Montag's devilish boyfriend, Spencer Pratt, is Team Heidi's president, vice president, and PR coordinator.

Giving the people what they want, MTV began the year with a cat fight we knew happened, but have been wanting to see on film for moths, as a tipsy Lauren - enraged over rumors of her sex tape making the rounds - and Heidi hurled insults at each other outside Les Deux.

Lauren is convinced, right or wrong, that Heidi and Spencer started and spread the rumor of her making a sex video with ex-boyfriend Jason Wahler.

The gist of Lauren's position on the matter, as told to Heidi Montag: "You know what you did! You know what you did! You're a sad, pathetic person!"

That about covers it.

"I could just never imagine hating someone so much that you'd do something like that to them," Lauren Conrad said later, reflecting on the incident.

Oh well. She has other things to worry about, like meeting the boy du jour at the club, and whether or not to criticize Audrina's boy, a mumbling, biker, hippie-type who she dated off and on a few years back and doesn't say much.

We heart Lauren, but at the same time, we wonder if she's not - at least at times - taking out some of her own frustrations and insecurities on her friends. 

Continue Reading...

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Audrina Patridge is definitely a part of Team LC on The Hills, but she did have a few words of wisdom about villainous co-star Heidi Montag.

The trusty sidekick of Lauren Conrad was spotted yesterday at an event for Bravo's new real estate themed reality show, Flipping Out, where she talked briefly about Heidi's recent plastic surgery.

Audrina at the TCA

"If they make her feel good about herself, good for her," Audrina Patridge said of Montag's new rack, later adding:

"I really don't care!"

When asked about the smarminess that is Spencer Pratt - Heidi's sniveling, scheming, revolting boyfriend-turned-fiance - Audrina offered the following response:

"No comment!"

Very apropos.

With the gruesome twosome out of the picture (or at least in their own apartment), Audrina revealed there will be an addition to The Hills cast this coming season: a boyfriend.

She chose to keep his identity a secret for now, but we can't help but wonder if it's Josh McRoberts ... or the guy frolicking on the beach LC in those recent bikini pictures.

You can watch Audrina's talk with TMZ here. Lauren Conrad, Audrina, Whitney Port and the rest of the regulars from The Hills officially return on Monday, August 13.

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As one of the web's leading purveyors of The Hills gossip, we admittedly weren't too crazy about Audrina Patridge when we first got to know her. We pegged her for a Kristin Cavallari-like alpha girl - not a positive presence in LC's life.

We thought she wasn't being too genuine at times, and wasn't super nice to Lauren Conrad. But in Season 2, the two got to be pretty close friends, with Audrina even moving into her apartment during The Hills season finale.

Photo of LC

Here, they're seen at the Celebrity Grand Slam Paddle Jam, an event that drew many hip young stars together. It's cool that Audrina Patridge and LC seem to be building a real friendship.

As for Lauren's ex-BFF and roomie, Heidi Montag, she wasn't there. Not sure where she was instead, but it probably involved staged, nauseating pictures with boyfriend Spencer Pratt.

Yeah. The Hollywood Gossip thinks Lauren is better off with Audrina and her other pals, such as Whitney Port and the possibly-engaged Katie Cassidy, than with Ms. Montag.

Good riddance to Heidi and Spencer (Prontag? Spiedi?).

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On last night's finale of Season 2 of MTV's The Hills, we saw Heidi Montag (right) move out of the apartment she shared with Lauren Conrad (left) and move in with her much-reviled boyfriend, Spencer Pratt - to the disgust of Conrad and everyone here at The Hollywood Gossip.

Minus Miss Montag, the cast of The Hills - Audrina Patridge, Whitney Port and Lauren Conrad - stopped by MTV's TRL in New York to chat about the season finale of their hit reality show, which aired that night.

Pimp and Ho

They didn't reveal too many details, but sources close to the cast report that a lot has gone down between the former roommates since the dramatic moving-out episode.

"Lauren and Heidi are no longer friends," a Hills source tells Us Weekly. "They never talk or hang out. Spencer achieved his goal and broke them apart."

This budding celebrity feud heated up even more Monday, when Montag ditched out on MTV's invitation to attend The Hills: Finale After Party - filmed before a live studio audience at MTV Studios in NYC last night.

During the broadcast, when host Susie Castillo asked Lauren Conrad how her friendship is with Heidi since The Hills concluded, she replied bluntly, "It's definitely different."

So why did Heidi Montag decline to join fellow Hills stars LC, Audrina, and Whitney (pictured below) at the after party show? A source close to the brash londe says she opted to stay back in Los Angeles with Pratt, who was not invited.

"Heidi was offended they wouldn't invite Spencer," says the source.

We're stunned that MTV didn't want that dirtbag on the air any longer. Anyway. Despite everything that happened, Lauren Conrad has not officially ruled out a reconciliation with her former BFF.

Asked whether she and Heidi could be friends again if she breaks up with Spencer Pratt, Conrad openly said it would be possible - and likely.

"Of course, I love Heidi. I was in a similar situation with her last year when I moved out with my boyfriend [Jason Wahler]. Heidi and I barely talked, but as soon as we broke up, she was there for me, and it only made our friendship stronger."

Meanwhile, Pratt and Montag are still shacking up in a Hollywood apartment.

"We're going to take over the world," Pratt recently told Us Weekly. "Heidi is the biggest star from that show."

Not if we see you at Hyde and beat you down first. Ass.

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Spencer Pratt.

Few words, phrases or individuals have ever enraged the Hollywood Gossip staff to this degree. OMFG. Has anyone ever deserved to be rolled up in a carpet and thrown off a bridge more than this a$$hole? The next time we see you at Hyde or Les Deux - yes, we go there, Spencer Pratt, and we will be watching you - you better grow eyes in the back of your head. We'll leave it at that.

Dweebs For a Good Cause

That should give you an idea of how the season finale of The Hills went last night, but we'll delve into further details for you just the same.

For a show that's supposed to star Lauren Conrad, there's a lot of stuff happening to people around her as she sits at home on the sofa reading (but still looking very fashionable, we might add).

Not that we're upset. We love the new Lauren Conrad who's emerged this season and doesn't take any crap. But in Season 3, let's have the girl do something. You heard us, MTV.

From the onset, the homebody LC bombarded one-time BFF Heidi Montag with zingers over her wishy-washy should-I-live-with-Spencer nonsense.

"You don't even live with me," Lauren Conrad snapped. "I just live with your stuff."

We knew what Heidi's decision was going to be for two reasons: She's weak, and the previews gave it away. But we're getting ahead of ourselves. The other person actually out doing stuff was Whitney Port, jetting off to NYC to interview for the permanent Teen Vogue job.

Wonderful as always, Whitney knocks 'em dead in the interview, but we're left hanging as to whether she beats out the other intern applicants. Cross your fingers, Hills watchers!

Okay, now we talk about what a psycho move it was for Spencer Pratt to get a new apartment after Heidi Montag clearly said no, then take her there as "a big surprise" and beg for her to move in again. And she did. Sellout.

Back at home, Heidi dropped the news to LC that she'd be moving out - a boring conversation so anticlimactic after all the talk about it that we almost clicked over to The Bachelor. Only we had it TiVo'd, so there's no point.

Over at the condo of Brody Jenner, Spencer was explaining that he really just wanted to keep Heidi away from Lauren and reassuring his buddy that he's a player 4 lyfe, yo, and would not be denied just because Heidi's movin' in!

The guy needs to be beaten repeatedly with a tire iron and strangled with his own retarded looking gold chain. You're not cool, bro. No one wears those.

We would leave it at that if it weren't for a brilliant exchange between Heidi and her co-worker, Elodie (what kind of name is that, and what do they actually do at work?) about Heidi's plans to cook dinner for the amazing Spencer that night.

Elodie: Do you even have all the equipment to cook? What's it called?
Heidi Montag: Dinner?
Elodie: No.
Heidi Montag: Pasta?
Elodie: No. The equipment to cook, like, pots, pans.
Heidi Montag
: Oh, I have to go get all that.

Lauren, meanwhile, was celebrating the conclusion of the epic roomie drama with champagne and pizza ... and her brand new roomie... Audrina Patridge!

We weren't big Audrina fans at first, but she's come around. In short, this episode was a complete waste of time, in that there was no drama and nothing new was revealed. But we love The Hills just the same, and can't wait for the next season with the girls.

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Before we begin this week's recap of The Hills, let us just reiterate a few points:

  • Don't you just love Whitney?
  • Don't you want to beat the ever-loving snot out of that disgusting ass clown Spencer, possibly with a baseball bat, then kick him in the ribs repeatedly as he writhes in pain on the ground?

Okay. Sorry. We had to get that off our collective chest.

Furry Friend

As Whitney Port, who plays a larger-than-usual role in this episode, gets ready to graduate from college, she ponders her future in the fashion biz. Whitney asks her boss, Lisa Love, if there are any opportunities at Teen Vogue, and whether she'd be considered.

Lisa tells her there is a position (the nebulous "Fashion Contributor") that is going to be opening up at Teen Vogue, but some other interns have similar qualifications as Whit and will be interviewing for it too.

Meanwhile, Lauren Conrad and Whitney work with that, like, kinda bitchy New York all-star intern, Emily, on a Good Morning America Oscar piece. A Vogue big shot is at the studio with the girls, and picks Whitney out of the crowd to, like, model one of the dresses!

Emily stews as the head honcho vows to put old girl Whitney Port on TV in one of Hilary Swank's Oscar dresses. OMFG!

But the meaning of the episode title, "Everybody Falls," hits home on the day of the shoot when Whitney tumbles down the steps on live TV. It was mortifying. That snarky little b!tch Emily even smirked at Whit's mishap.

After the taping, Lauren (in a cute role reversal) does her best to comfort her friend, who is understandably devastated by the mistake.

All is well the next day, however, as Lisa gives Whitney great praise for handling the incident with class and grace under fire. Lisa wishes to send her - with a high recommendation - to NYC to interview for the Teen Vogue position opening up.

Audrina Patridge is nowhere to be found, and even LC is hardly featured in this episode. Mainly it's Whitney and Heidi and Spencer - who bicker, once again, over moving in together.

Heidi says there is a trust factor between them, to which Spencer pretends to be shocked. Spencer and Heidi argue about her intentions and puts the pressure on. To make a long story short, this stuck up prick gives her an ultimatum to move in with him or let him slut around with the rest of L.A.

When a distraught Heidi gives that slimy Spencer Pratt her final "no" on moving in, and he throws her out of his car. The conversation went like this:

Spencer Pratt: "You need to tell me your final answer."
Heidi Montag: "Well, like, my answer is no."
Spencer Pratt: "Fine, then my answer is get the hell out of my car."

But don't start crying for Heidi Montag (or celebrating the departure of Spencer) just yet. The previews for next week's season finale show Heidi pulling away in, like, a moving truck and looking back at a tearful LC.

Way to stick to your guns, babe. And on a side note, does anyone else think it's weird that The Hills gives away everything in its previews? Some shows tease you a little, but you basically know what's going on from the second you catch scenes from the next episode. Weird!

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Not from the simple, yet sage words of Lauren Conrad:

  • "I think if a guy after a few months asked if I wanted to move in with him, I'd be like, Whoa." - to Heidi
  • "A good roommate is like a good pair of jeans â€" you hold on to them no matter what." - to Heidi
  • "If you do a really shady thing, be like, 'I was shady.'" - to Jen
  • "You were evil and conniving. It wasn't all Brody; it was you." - to Jen

All these quotes and more stemmed from the drama on last night's episode of The Hills, which featured Lauren's coming of age - and not just because she celebrated her 21st birthday party at Hyde.

Gnarly Heidi Montag

Finally, America's sweetheart is learning to stand up for herself, ladies and gentlemen.

The episode begins with Lauren and Heidi at the homestead. After a brief moment of tension during their discussion of Heidi possibly moving in with that douchebag Spencer Pratt, the estranged BFFs seemed cool again (thus the jeans comment).

And she's right. Who isn't happy to have Heidi Montag back on Team LC! Even better that Heidi was clearly getting along with Audrina Patridge as well, conspiring to plan Lauren's surprise party.

What wasn't all good was Heidi's relationship with Jen, who had the nerve to show up at Heidi's workplace to talk about her fight with Lauren!

Jen, apparently, is, like, best friends with Lauren. So she says. Which is why you hooked up with Brody Jenner behind LC's back, right? Bitch! Still, Jen laments: "I haven't talked to my best friend of 15 years for, like, what? For, like, sloppy thirds?"

Before telling her she had to get back to work, Heidi took the high road and said that she wasn't getting involved and this spat is between Jen and Lauren.

Later, Heidi throws Lauren off the party trail by faking like she was canceling on Lauren for Spencer for the 245th time. Wow, talk about a realistic lie! Lauren Conrad looked like she was about to cry, which was sad, but she was cool with it when everyone surprised her at Hyde.

It was weird, though, with Brody Jenner being back on the scene. And, OMG, going straight to asking about Jen. The guy may be hunky but he has some kind of nerve. It was nice, we think, that he apologized, even though Lauren insisted it wasn't his fault, when it, like, kind of was.

SIDE NOTE: Can you believe when Whitney Port told Lauren at work that she dated Brody once? Has this guy dated every cute girl in Southern California - and how does this not come up at Teen Vogue HQ until right now?

SIDE NOTE #2: What's funnier - the fact that Lauren Conrad is now 21, but has been going to these hot clubs for some time now, or the fact The Hills gals have become big enough stars that we knew about LC's 21st birthday party when it happened six weeks ago?

Anyway, back to reality. When Jen showed up at Lauren's place to apologize (and we use that term loosely), Lauren wasn't having any of it.

"You put yourself in this situation, she said before showing Jen the door.

If only she'd treat the guys in her life with the same determination. At least the legal system isn't as forgiving to Jason Wahler, right?

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Note to Spencer Pratt: If we ever see you at Hyde, we might just have to beat the living crap out of you. Which shouldn't be that hard. So consider yourself warned.

This is not because The Hollywood Gossip is out to get people or enjoys violent conflict. It's simply because Spencer Pratt fills us with blinding, unrelenting rage. Basically, watching him on The Hills makes us want to channel our inner Jason Wahler and go postal.

Laker Love

It was probably during last night's clothing-store scene â€" when Spencer was asking Heidi Montag to move in with him while constantly pawing at her â€" that we realized how bad this guy needs a boot to the f*%king skull.

Of course, as Entertainment Weekly wryly notes, the way he so selflessly dedicates himself to being creepily manipulative for our viewing pleasure is nothing short of miraculous.

Taking a break from Spencer for a second, the gang starts off the episode gearing up for the best New Year's Eve ever. We're also informed that the lovely Whitney Port, LC's fellow intern, is also a decent softball player.

Seriously, she can really drive the ball!

In addition to planning a hot NYE at the nightclub Area, everyone was also acting determined to make amends after the great Heidi-Lauren rift.

"I feel like, 2006 was a hard year on our friendship, and I want to spend New Year's with her," Heidi tells Spencer.

On the big night, he kept repeating how much he despised her friends and the fact that she "chooses them" over him. As if a girl can't have both a boyfriend as well as female friends. That'd just be too f*%ked up.

So it goes in the mind of Spencer Pratt, however. Why is Brody Jenner even friends with this tool again? At dinner, before they met up with the group at Area, Spencer told Heidi:

"I don't even want to go to the club. I just want to take you home right now. But you have another boyfriend named Lauren Conrad."

Blinding, unfocused and unrelenting rage
.

Things were much cheerier on Lauren's side, thankfully, where her big plan for self-improvement in 2007 was to take kickboxing with Audrina Patridge.

Hey, every girl's gotta have a New Year's resolution. Lauren's pal from Laguna Beach, Lo, also paid a nice visit. Moreover, Lauren met a pal of a pal of Audrina's (vacationing from Colorado) who she could smooch on New Year's, too!

We've loving Lauren's newfound interest in regular guys, by the way. Maybe it's just that Heidi dates Spencer. But it shows LC's not as superficial as may of her peers.

Heidi, meanwhile, seemed intent on her underlying goal to destroy her friendship with Lauren (or what's left of it) by blabbing to Lo about Spencer suggesting they move in together - without mentioning it to her roomie. WTF!

Then, taking a page str8 outta Spencer's playbook, she got all pensive and pouty at midnight when no one, like, was paying attention to her. Absolutely classic Heidi.

Days later, Spencer was still at it.

"I've been thinking a lot," he told Heidi. "I think it's really rude that you've chosen Lauren over me."

And our blood pressure keeps on rising.

NEXT WEEK: The return of Brody Jenner (amazing how he keeps turning up) as well as that girl Jen. Plus, Lauren Conrad's big 21st birthday!

Audrina Patridge Biography

Audrina Patridge in a Bikini Audrina Patridge stars on The Hills. Maybe you recognize Audrina Patridge from that show ... or from those hot nude pics that surfaced... More »
Born
Birthplace
Yorba Linda, California
Full Name
Audrina Cathleen Patridge

Audrina Patridge Quotes

[The role is] giving me the chance to show people [what I can do]. This is why I moved to L.A.

Audrina Patridge [on snagging a movie role]

Lauren Conrad [on a random Les Deux club-goer]: He thinks I like him.
Audrina Patridge: He thinks you like him?
Lauren Conrad: Seriously, I never wanted to stab myself in the eye more.

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