The last thing we learned from an interview with Ashton Kutcher? He and wife, Demi Moore, never fight. They're known as the anti-Heather Mills and Paul McCartney to, well, this website.
In the latest issue of Details, Kutcher isn't done talking about the love of his life. He knew his single days were over when single gals started ringing his doorbell late at night looking for a good time, and Moore began answering the door and screaming, "There's no fâ€"king party here!"
Well, ok then. Here are other tidbits from the interivew
On the night he met Demi:
"Honestly, I was, like, jocking some other girl that night. My focus was on hooking up with somebody else â€¦ I liked GI Jane, but I didn't think she was hot as GI Jane. She was never my cup of tea."
On his single days:
"It's like this. You're in the club. You've got a bottle of vodka. You're standing up on the couches. You've got your right-hand man [Diddy] standing there. You've got Danny [Masterson] and Wilmer [Valderrama] and all of our guys hanging out, and the fâ€"king girls are fighting to see who's going to be behind the table here ... Like, fâ€"king fighting!
Like gouging other b-tches out of the way! And then you go, â€˜All right, we're going back to blah blah blah,' and then you're moving as a mass through the club, and you pick up about 15 or 20 more along the way. Now you've gotten into a car with, like, four select girls and you're at the new space, and you just start certain things up. It was so ego-fulfilling. It was retarded."
On one secret to a happy marriage:
"When your wife calls, you have to take it, no matter what you're doing."
(Gossip note: Got that, Kevin Federline? We know you're afraid of answering the phone because you're afraid it's your 15 minutes calling and ending things, but Britney needs your clothing advice!)
On when he knew Demi was The One:
"So when we went to dinner I organized it so she was sitting across from me. And then she said something at the dinner table that was, like, so fâ€"king profound that at that point, I didn't have a choice."
On his lack of confidence in his career:
"I'll read how sh-tty they think I am. I don't necessarily think all the critics are wrong ... I don't think I'm that good. And they don't think I'm that good. So I'm not pulling that feeling out of my ass. They're just backing up that feeling that I already have about myself."