The Hollywood Gossip is proud to bring you Tale of the Tape, in which we break down prospective matchups within the celebrity world that you might never have considered. Because they are pointless, and above all, not real.

Our current match-up features a pair of sisters... that's four celebs in all. You know these siblings well, and may harbor strong feelings towards them. Some of you may have even slept with one of them. Who are we to say? All we know is that when the gloves come off between the Olsen Twins and the spawn of Crazy Joe Simpson, you are gonna see some insane $h!t.

Posted in: Ashlee Simpson

The humble abode that Jessica Simpson and younger sister Ashlee Simpson used to call home is officially on the market.

Located in the heart of Dallas, Texas, the home is currently going for a reasonable $200,000. With home loan rates on the decline, and Texas real estate representing some of the best investment opportunities in the U.S., you'd be a fool to pass on this gem!

Posted in: Ashlee Simpson

You'd think Ashlee Simpson has enough to worry about these days, with her premiere on stage in Chicago coming up, along with a crazy father to pose for pictures in front of.

Sometimes, though, you've gotta respond to curses places on you by a Texas priest. It's just the life of a bad, extraordinarily thin singer.

Posted in: Ashlee Simpson

Joe Simpson is more than just a husband, father and manager. He's also a crazy person. Oh, and most recently, a member of the paparazzi.

Reports are coming in that the former minister turned control freak has developed a very close relationship with the popular photo agency WireImage in exchange for unique access to his daughters Jessica and Ashlee Simpson.

Posted in: Ashlee Simpson

Hey, Braxton Olita -- we saw your girlfriend today. She's featured in Crack Whore Magazine (the online edition)! What what!!! **fist pump** We're just kidding. Not really. Have you seen the girl who used to be Ashlee Simpson lately? What the hell has happend to her?

Sure, she never had a shred of talent, but she was Jessica's little sister and cute enough at least. Now that she's become an anorexic plastic surgery fiend, the staff members at T.H. Gossip can only shake their heads in disdain. Check out this ghastly pic we found today, not in the aforementioned CWM (which doesn't really exist, FYI, though it would be an awesome read), but in People. She's giving Kate Moss a run for her money!

Posted in: Ashlee Simpson

Talk about foreshadowing. The talentless, malnourished Ashlee Simpson actually had the foresight to name her recently-released single "Invisible."

The song, which appears on Ashlee's second CD I Am Me (the working title, I Can't F*%king Sing, was reportedly changed at the last minute), is getting a lot of airplay these days. It's certainly aptly titled. First, she got plastic surgery and took care of that nose. Apparently that chin also took a beating.

Posted in: Ashlee Simpson

Ashlee Simpson Biography

Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson-Wentz Oh, Ashlee Simpson, ye of little worth. She is Jessica's annoying, less hot, talentless, plastic surgery-loving little sister. Woo! Yup,... More »
Born
Birthplace
Dallas, Texas
Full Name
Ashlee Nicole Simpson-Wentz

Ashlee Simpson Quotes

I didn't know I'd be getting married right now, but I'm so happy to be! I'm a lucky girl.

Ashlee Simpson

Do I look like I had 10 cheeseburgers or something?

Ashlee Simpson [avoiding pregnancy questions]