by Mischalova at

Zahara Jolie-Pitt is not pleased.

The adopted daughter of Brangelina just wants an ice cream cone.

Angelina Jolie Rules Brad Pitt

Merely a taste. One quick lick.

But Angelina Jolie is having none of it.

She sees what extra calories can do to previously thin, beautiful women. Why do you think Keira Knightley hasn't eaten dessert in 12 years?

Poor, powerless Brad Pitt, meanwhile, can only stand by and watch his daughter suffer. We thought he was stronger than that. But we may have the actor confused with his character in Fight Club.

In the end, Angelina, an ice cream cone isn't the end of the world. It's alcohol that's the Devil's beverage of choice. Just ask Lindsay Lohan.

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by Hilton Hater at

To paraphrase his signature sign-off, Ryan Seacrest is out ... of patience for a certain beautiful actress.

E!'s resident red carpet monkey and host of American Idol was candid about his reaction to being brushed off during an interview before the Golden Globe Awards over the weekend.

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt at the Golden Globes

On his KIIS-FM radio show in L.A. on yesterday morning, the metrosexual was simply none too pleased with Angelina Jolie.

"I asked her four questions and she didn't even answer me," he said. "I literally stood there and tried to ask a couple of questions. At one point I just kind of let the E! microphone sit in front of her for a second to see if she was going to acknowledge it, and she clearly wanted nothing to do with me or my question or my answer or any of it."

Seacrest had nothing but nice things to say about, Brad Pitt, however. He was standing next to his baby's momma throughout the awkward interview.

"Brad was fantastic."

He continued: "I think doing good is fantastic. A lot of people are benefiting around the world from their doing of all of these nobles things. But smile."

Cohost Ellen K then came to Angie's defense saying: "Well, she has said that she finds all these award shows a waste of time and money."

"Well then don't go," Seacrest shot back. "Don't go. Don't go support your man. Don't go."

The man does make a point. Part of being famous involves putting on a fake smile and spouting cliches into a microphone.

Or making a sex tape, if you're Kim Kardashian.

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by Hilton Hater at

Only Brad Pitt could upstage Drew Brees.

While the latter has moved the New Orleans Saints to within one game of the Super Bowl, the former has simply moved into the city. And that's newsworthy enough.

Bored with Brad

Pitt and his lovely ladyfriend, Angelina Jolie, have taken up residence in the city most besieged by Hurricane Katrina. Naturally, children - Maddox,5, Zahara, 2, and 7-month-old Shiloh - have joined them.

"We love it there," Jolie told Us Weekly at the Golden Globe Awards after confirming the move. "The kids are going to go to school there. We're really looking forward to it."

So are locals, such as Jorge Palacios. The random dude said Jolie blended right in at a city restaurant the other night:

"No one at my table believed me when I told them it was her."

It's a good thing for Angelina that the Sports Gal wasn't anywhere in the vicinity.

Rest assured Brangelina will get to work with charities in the region. Aside from looking beautiful, it's what the couple does best.

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by Hilton Hater at

Angelina Jolie knows a thing or six dozen about adopting children from other countries.

Therefore, she can sympathize with Madonna, whose efforts to adopt 1-year-old David Banda from Malawi have sparked controversy.

Angelina Jolie is The Tourist

"I have been horrified by the attacks she's been subjected to," Jolie tells the French magazine Gala. "All that should count is the happiness of her little David."

Nevertheless, Jolie whose son Maddox, 5, and Zahara, who turned 2 on Monday, are from Cambodia and Ethiopia, respectively, has some criticism for the singer.

"Madonna knew the situation in Malawi, where (David) was born," Jolie says. "It's a country where there is no real legal framework for adoption. Personally, I prefer to stay on the right side of the law. I would never take a child away from a place where adoption is illegal."

She would, however, steal the huband of Jennifer Aniston. But that's not really news anymore.

On Friday, Malawian child welfare official Adrina Mchiela said the government is satisfied with the way Madonna has been caring for David.

"We have been monitoring her and so far we see a loving mother in Madonna and David is very fine," she told Reuters.

In her interview with Gala, Jolie also talks about her relationship with Brad Pitt.

"Don't go repeating it whatever you do, but, yes I love him. I love him a lot," she says. "After I met him my life seemed more harmonious."

We assume that's how Nicole Richie felt once she discovered vomiting.

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by Hilton Hater at

We always knew Angelina Jolie was special.

The woman is gorgeous and generous.

Brange

Except maybe when it comes to stealing the husband of Jennifer Aniston. But anyway.

Turns out we had no idea just how unique Angelina was. Check out this depiction of the actress, alongside children Zahara, Maddox and Shiloh Nouvel.

It's known as "Blessed Art Thou" and the artist chose Jolie because:

...of her unavoidable presence in the media, the world-wide anticipation of her child, her 'unattainable' beauty and the good that she is doing in the world through her example ...

We don't wish to disrupt Brangelina here, but we do have one question for the woman behind this drawing, Kate Kretz:

Does the Lord not love Brad Pitt?

Perhaps we should save that question for Stephen Baldwin.

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by Hilton Hater at

For Brangelina, Christmas is no time to rest. If anything, it's a time to give back more than ever before.

The gorgeous couple spent its holiday, spending Monday handing out gifts to refugee children in the Costa Rican capital San Jose.

Brad Cheating on Angelina!

"We had a wonderful Christmas both with the Costa Rican people and the Colombian refugee families we met," Angelina Jolie said in a statement. Her visit was part of her work as a goodwill ambassador for the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees.

About 11,500 refugees have come to Costa Rica, most of them from Colombia, where an armed conflict between leftist guerrillas, soldiers and paramilitary forces has forced them to flee, says the UNHCR. All told, an estimated 3 million Colombians have been forced from their homes.

"The conflict in Colombia is the greatest humanitarian tragedy in the Western Hemisphere, but it receives very little international attention," the lady friend of Brad Pitt said after her arrival in San Jose.

"My Christmas message to Colombian refugees and to the millions of displaced people in Colombia is that the world has not totally forgotten them."

In San Jose, People magazine reports, Jolie and Pitt dropped in on several small businesses established by refugees thanks to UNHCR economic initiatives. They also talked with young refugees, learning about the problems they and their families have faced.

It was the sort of stuff that makes a Katie Rees sex scandal seem almost unimportant by comparison.

"It's been sad for me to hear so many negative stories that show confusion between refugees, who are the victims of the conflict, and some criminal elements," Jolie said.

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by Hilton Hater at

Last week, The Sports Gal - wife of ESPN.com columnist, Bill Simmons - was in a festive mood.

This week, she's putting coal in the stocking of a certain celebrity. And it's not Rosie O'Donnell. To hear her say it ...

Backstabbing Jen!

I used to really like Angelina Jolie. Ever since she starred in Gia, I admired her flawless natural beauty, as well as the many character flaws that made her more likable and less threatening overall.

Maybe she was a recovering drug addict, a cutter, a brother kisser, and a blood vial-wearing skank who looked like she showered once a week, but she didn't care what others thought and was totally comfortable going out in public without tons of makeup on. So that made her likable, at least to me.

Then everything changed: She adopted Maddox, became a goodwill ambassador, started making normal movies and slowly made everyone forget that she was crazy. Next, she seduced and stole the husband of one of the most likable female celebs, adopted another baby with her stolen man, then had his biological child months before his divorce was even done.

But what really turned me into a full fledged Angelina hater was this month's Vogue article about her, with Angelina smugly pushing for peace talks between her and Jennifer Aniston, even having the gall to say, "That would be her decision, and I would welcome it."

If I were Jennifer Aniston, I would welcome it, too. Then I would meet Angelina for lunch and repeatedly smash a chair over her head.

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by Hilton Hater at

Bring on more babies, said Angelina Jolie on ABC's Good Morning America yesterday.

However, The Good Sheperd actress stated her and Brad Pitt will likely adopt their next child in an effort to add to their mixed-race family.

Fake Brangelina News Covers

For those just waking up from a coma, the beautiful celebrity couple has gone the adoption route a couple times already: first, with 5-year-old Maddox, whom Jolie adopted from Cambodia and has nicknamed "Mad."

Then, there's 23-month-old daughter, Zahara, who was adopted from Ethiopia and goes by "Z"; 6-month old daughter, Shiloh, who was born to the couple in May.

"I want Mad to know that as our family grew and we all came together, we didn't just start having children, biological children," Jolie said.

She went on to note that while having another biological child with Pitt is a possibility, it is more likely that Brangelina would adopt another child first.

"I even think that I did make it clear that we, we would think about adopting next, which is important for me in the balance of how - in our own family, our kids perceive it," Jolie said.

"Yes, we have Shiloh and it's been a wonderful experience, but we want to find another brother or sister in the world for our family."

The actress said that she and Pitt make special time for each child, and that they enjoy the normal aspects of parenting.

"Really, the big special times are just like this morning, just very, just a lot of nothing together. Just sitting around coloring. We broke the coffee machine. We tried to fix it," she said. "We were playing with the kids, just trying to find somebody's bottle, change somebody's diaper that's, you know, gone leaky and just all that good stuff."

Meanwhile, J.R. Rotem is trying to sneak as many women as he can into night clubs. Maybe someone should give him a lesson about what's important in life.

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by Hilton Hater at

And she's talking about her family in next month's issue.

Below are excerpts from the cover story Angelina Jolie gave to Vogue, in which The Good Sheperd star opens up about everything from marriage to a certain gal named Jen.

Cute Brangelina Photo

On Brad Pitt:
"Brad was a huge surprise to me. I, like most people, had a very distant impression of him from ... the media. I am just as guilty! We push each other to be better. Even if it's just a better bike rider or a better pilot. We're constantly in competition with each other. He's somebody I admire based on the way he lives his life. And that's why I'm with him. [He is] the person closest to me."

On their relationship:
"[We] found this strange friendship and partnership that kind of just suddenly happened [on the set of their Mr. & Mrs. Smith]. I think a few months in I realized, God, I can't wait to get to work. Whether it was shooting a scene or arguing about a scene or gun practice or dance class or doing stunts - anything we had to do with each other, we just found a lot of joy in it together and a lot of real teamwork. Life developed in a way where we could be together, and where it felt like something we would do, we should do.

On marriage:
"We are legally bound to our children, not to each other, and I think that's the most important thing."

On Jennifer Aniston:
"We've, like, passed each other and said 'hi' briefly, shook hands. But not a real sit-down-and-talk kind of meeting."

On Shiloh:
"The day Shiloh came home...we looked around at three sleeping children and each other and thought, My God! Here we are! This is amazing! Couldn't be happier! But ...wow. We can't even figure out how to get them all in the car."

We're not sure, Ang. But here's one piece of advice: don't let Nicole Richie drive it.

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by Hilton Hater at

For the record: Ellen Pompeo really is getting married to Chris Ivery.

We make this point because sometimes marriages are arranged between wax figures, not human beings. Such was the case between the amazing Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie.

Brangelina at the Oscars

The faux pair were going to be married Wednesday during a wedding at Madame Tussaud's Museum of Wax in Las Vegas. Seriously. However, reps for Brangelina called the absurd stunt off.

While the actual couple was visiting orphanages in India, Pitt's rep, Cindy Guagenti, said:

"I personally found it a little odd that they were re-creating a wedding that never really happened."

Gee, think so? Meanwhile, the wax George Clooney was slated to be the best man, while witnesses and guests would've included Liberace, John Wayne, and Ben Affleck - the fake ones, we assume.

Anyway. We're glad the wedding didn't happen. It wouldn't been heart-breaking when the fake Pitt had an affair with the wax Abbie Cornish.

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