Joel McHale Quotes
Every year, the White House doctor checks the president's colon for polyps and George Clooney's head.
- Permalink: George Clooney burn!
Now, over 8 million people have signed up for Obamacare, which is impressive, until you realize that Ashley Tisdale has 12 million Twitter followers.
- Permalink: Obamacare burn!
Joel McHale: Fox News is the highest rated network in cable news. And it's all thanks to their key demographic: the corpses of old people who tuned into Fox News and haven't yet been discovered.
- Permalink: Fox News burn!
In nine months we will officially have a sequel to Bad Grandpa. When the baby is born, do you give Bill Clinton a cigar?
- Permalink: Bill Clinton burn!
It's crazy to think that Joe Biden is only one heartbeat away from no one taking him seriously as President.
- Permalink: Joe Biden burn!
Joel McHale: People are asking, 'will Donald Trump run again?' And the answer is: 'does that thing on his head crap in the woods?' I actually don't know. I don't know if that thing on his head has a digestive system.
- Permalink: Donald Trump burn!
Hillary Clinton has a lot going for her as a candidate. She has the experience, she's a natural leader and as our first female president, we could pay her 30 percent less. That's a saving this country could use!
- Permalink: Clinton in 2016?
Joel McHale: Between Rob Ford, Justin Bieber and Ted Cruz, you just want to tell Canada: "Hey, hey. Relax. We already have a Florida.
- Permalink: Florida burn!
Joel McHale: CNN is desperately searching for something that's been missing for months: their dignity.
- Permalink: CNN burn!