I think having a TV show that shows your personality and your intimate life, you know, showing your best friend, and then showing having sex ... to me it's kind of the same thing because both things are intimate.

[To Charlie Sheen] You sound like you have mental issues, (hints maybe you need some anger management counseling) given your disgusting lash out towards my body and my relationship with my daughter which each are both the epitome of perfection.

Thank you guys for all your support. Without you, none of this would be possible. I love every one of you and I could not be more appreciative. God bless you.

Miley Cyrus [at a concert, soon after photo scandal broke]

I have learned a lot from my contact with [the aliens]. Now I know that my spirit is very old. And also that humans are the least sophisticated civilization - we’re on the lowest level of evolution.

You have to be wired in a way of being so committed to the mission, the mission that we're on, reform of this country and victory in the war. You can't blink. So I didn't blink then even when asked to run as his running mate.

Sarah Palin

[to Kenya Moore] "You a sneaky, trifling slut."

Phaedra Parks

She’s soooo f*cking fat! She’s 5′2″ and she’s like 140. She was wearing a sarong to cover her huge big ass.

Shanna Moakler [on Kim Kardashian]

She is a great mom. She is super mom.

Joel Madden [on Nicole Richie]

We will go to extreme lengths to protect his identity.

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