We love The Hills, and proudly admit this fact.

Yet even the biggest fans of Lauren Conrad & Co., such as ourselves, can't deny the absurdity of the ladies' meteoric rise in popularity.

They've become celebrity news mainstays - stars big enough to make the premise and "reality" of their show silly - and debatable at best.

Despite having no real careers, The Hills stars have become household names ... yet still downplay it by acting like they're totally normal.

It's a strange, paradoxical dichotomy they're trying to pull off.

Case in point: At a recent opening of an Orange County bowling alley, Audrina Patridge told reporters they could only ask her questions about ... bowling.

Bowling? The Soup's Joel McHale was not happy to hear this.

His response, as shown in this Soup segment, is classic...

It's been awhile since we've heard from Alli Sims.

Guess her singing career didn't take off quite as planned.

In any case, Jamie Lynn Spears' possible cousin says the 17-year-old will make a great mother to newborn daughter, Maddie.

"I'm sure the baby's beautiful, and I'm so glad everybody's healthy and doing well," Sims said at a party for Wanted in Los Angeles Thursday.

"I just wish them all the happiness in the world," she said. "I know they're going to have so much fun."

Alli Sims may have no career to speak of, but she's still quick to comment and sponge off "cousins" Jamie Lynn and Britney Spears whenever possible.

Sims â€" who said she is still "great friends" with Britney (now recording another new album) â€" added that she plans on sending "something cute."

"I'm sure they're doing great. I know they're so excited," Alli Sims said.

Maddie Briann Aldridge was born to Jamie Lynn and Casey Aldridge Thursday at Mississippi Southwest Regional Medical Center in McComb, Miss.

We now pause from breaking Jamie Lynn Spears baby news to report another Spears family development - and one you likely didn't expect.

Apparently, Britney Spears is busy working on an upcoming album, her vocal producer and co-writer, Jim Beanz, reports this morning.

The singer, 26, has had her share of drama in the past year, to say the least. But in April, former manager Larry Rudolph reconnected with the singer in April and reported that she already had been going into the studio "just for fun."

"She is on the right path," Rudolph reported.

Body-wise, at least, Britney Spears does appear on the right path. Hot!

How will Britney Spears' new efforts compare to her last album - and for the love of all things holy, will she subject us to more dreadful live performances?

It doesn't take much to make Paula Abdul cry.

Therefore, we can only imagine how the American Idol judge reacted upon breaking up with restaurateur J.T. Torregiani.

The pair parted ways approximately two months ago, but no one cared enough about either to report it at the time; Torregiani has moved out of the American Idol judge's Los Angeles home.

"She's doing fine," a friend of Abdul's told Us Weekly. "She has moved on with her life."

Good news and bad new regarding Amy Winehouse.

Which do you want first? The bad? Okay, well, doctors say the hospitalized Amy has an irregular heartbeat. That's not what you want.

The good news, though, is that she has not died! Woo!

Doctors somehow are still running tests to determine what's wrong with the Grammy winner. We're not physicians, but we have a theory:

MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF HARD-ASS DRUG USE OVER SEVERAL YEARS.

Just one hypothesis. In any case, The Sun (U.K.) reports that Amy's family plans to keep her in the hospital as long as they can.

They're serious about this, too. If Amy tries to flee the hospital, the family plans to go to court to try and keep her in.

Her father, Mitch Winehouse, told the newspaper, "Amy is doing fine. She is staying in as long as possible."

Alright, then. We're sure Blake Fielder-Civil is doing "fine" as well, trying to stave off beatdowns in the prison shower.

Ali Lohan is desperate to be famous.

We wonder if she'll settle for being a troll.

According to E! Online, the reality star and sister of Lindsay Lohan is director John Carl Buechler's top choice for a lead role in the big-budget remake of his 1986 film, Troll.

Ali auditioned last week for the role of the young Eunice St. Clair.

"She was great," Buechler somehow said. "The camera loves her. She's a really good actress... I am personally going to fight for her."

Ali Lohan craves fame. Her mother has raised her well.

The "retelling of the original story with some twists" (as the director describes it) does not currently have a release date. The original marked the big screen debut of Julia Louis-Dreyfus.

If the hiring of Lohan goes through, the remake would mark the debut of Ali on screen, as well. Until her eventual sex tape, that is.

It may not be another ad with David Beckham in underwear, but the following Sharpie commercial is still worth viewing.

The reason? Well, David Beckham.

You can still see the soccer stud's face and all...

Whether or not Keira Knightley is anorexic can be debated for hours.

But the fact that Keira Knightley is beautiful is indisputable.

With that in mind, men may wanna line up for her latest movie, despite its chick flick-esque title, The Edge of Love. How come? In a word: boobs!

Rupert Friend isn't the only person who can see Keira Knightley nude.

"I always bare my breasts," Knightley said at the press conference to promote the film at the Edinburgh International Film Festival. "It's not like it's only in this film!"

She makes a good point. The Love Actually star did bare it all in Atonement last year, as she explained why she gets naked in the new movie during the same press conference.

"It was very simple. It was a sex scene and I never like them when they've got bras on," she said, referring to a hot part of the script. "[So when the director asked me to remove her bra] I said, 'All right then.'"

All is right with that decision, indeed, Keira.

Eli is the Man-ning.

Not only did the baby-faced New York Giants quarterback lead his team to victory in Super Bowl XLII, the greatest football game ever, he signed a lifetime contract with the adorable Abby McGrew shortly thereafter!

You'd think that would exempt him from scrutiny for some time, but this is New York - and when he and Abby McGrew went to the Whitney Contemporaries Art Party and Auction, the celebrity fashion critics came out in force!

One fashion critic said the newly-wedded Mannings wore their best "junior prom attire." Another said Abby's dress was "too short, too tight, and doesn't fit well. The zipper doesn't zip and she's bursting out of it."

We're not sure why that's a bad thing, but we leave it up to you, our readers and armchair celebrity fashion critics, to judge for yourself:

Abby McGrew's dress: Love it or shove it?

Anne Hathaway isn't feeling like her usual, upbeat self.

These things happen when we dump our significant others, even when they had it coming for being shady, possible white-collar criminals.

"My personality is very kind of, you know, girlish, bubbly," she said on The View Thursday. "Not today... I'm kind of somber today."

"Mood swings?" asked Joy Behar.

"Let's not go there," Anne said.

Wednesday, multiple celebrity gossip sources report that Anne Hathaway dumped her longtime beau, Italian businessman Raffaello Follieri.

"All the shady stuff was too much," said a source. Indeed.

The Daily Mail (U.K.) had reported specifically that Hathaway feared that a string of Raffaello Follieri legal woes could hurt her career.

Follieri is under investigation by the New York State Attorney General's office for failing to file tax-disclosure forms for his charity.

He was also arrested in April for bouncing a $215,000 check.