by Free Britney at . Comments

We welcome you, celebrity news fans around the world, to The Hollywood Gossip Caption Contest. This week's winner: lucy lesbian. Congratulations!

The winning reply appears below the pic. Scroll down the page to read the full list of (hilarious) captions we received. Please come back and play every week!

Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin Texting

Oh look, there's someone Bill hasn't f***ed.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Law enforcement sources have spoken about the craziness in Britney Spears' house - profanity, nudity, drugs and wild mood swings - last Thursday.

According to TMZ, sources say when the authorities arrived, Britney was holed up in the master bathroom with Jayden James. Officers saw Britney from the backyard holding Jayden, who did not appear to be upset.

Britney refused to come out for nearly three hours.

When she finally emerged, sources report, all she was wearing was panties. Interesting, since she often wears plenty of clothing, but no underwear.

Spears was incoherent, screaming, "What the f*%k are you doing in my house? I know who you are... I don't need your f*%king help. You will do as I say!"

Spears eventually put on a see-through nightgown. Cops wanted to cover her with a sweater, but she screamed, "Don't cover me up. I'm f*%king hot!" 

Britney Spears just plain lost it, then was carted out of her house.

Britney's assistant said Spears had been "popping pills" all day. Her code for medication was "vitamins." Officers found Prozac in her bedroom.

Sam Lutfi arrived and said he and others around Britney Spears "knew this was coming for a long time," but didn't know how bad it would get.

According to Sam Lutfi, Britney is so unstable, she recently bought a house in Malibu on a whim, began moving furniture in... then changed her mind.

Spears' nanny told cops that Britney would often dress up to the nines - for no reason. She would walk around the house, then change back.

Earlier that day, Spears was unworried about attending her deposition with Mark Vincent Kaplan and would not heed warnings to show up on time.

Police will testify about the insanity at Monday's custody hearing - a make or break day for Britney Spears if she ever wants to see her kids.

by Mischalova at . Comments

Move over, Amy Fisher: Caught on Tape.

There's a new sex tape on the way. And you may be familiar with one of its stars.

Red Light District has reportedly acquired the rights to distribute an elicit video featuring Amy's ex-flame, Joey Buttafuoco, and his new wife Evanka. The footage will be released February 6 under the title Joey Buttafuoco: Caught On Tape. Of course.

According to Red Light CEO David Joseph, Buttafuoco was videotaped having sex with Evanka, while attending a party at porn director Rob Spallone's home last year.

Now that a Tiffany Pollard sex tape exists, will people even care about Joey Buttafuco's video? 

Joseph said the couple cut away during the party "to talk and have sex," unaware that Spallone had hidden three cameras in the bedroom to catch "late-night action" from the porn stars in attendance.

"Spallone didn't know that he had captured Joey and Evanka until a couple of weeks later when he completed reviewing the footage from the party," said Joseph.

"He was so surprised to find Joey and Evanka on the tapes. When he realized what he had, he came to Red Light District to discuss distribution. He knows we are the best in town to work with on these types of deals."

So, we're supposed to believe that Buttafuoco accidentally made a sex tape?!? That's like saying Tila Tequila naked pics show up online without her knowing about them.

by Mischalova at . Comments

Following ABC's announcement that The Bachelorette will be coming back for a fourth season this summer, here's a photo of the original contestant on that show.

Trista Rehn and Ryan Sutter are the only pairing to have survived in the history of The Bachelor or The Bachelorette. They're seen here with adorable son, Maxwell:

Trista Pic

It's probably safe to say that Trista and Ryan Sutter have had a slightly more successful courtship than Byron Velvick and Mary Delgado.

by Free Britney at . Comments

O.J. Simpson is currently in custody in Florida on allegations that he violated terms of his bail in a Las Vegas armed robbery case, according to CNN.

Simpson was to go before a judge Wednesday at the request of Clark County District Attorney David Roger. The prosecutor was filing a motion Friday to revoke Simpson's bail, according to a court clerk.

O.J. Mugshot

"We understand he's in the custody of his bail bondsman in Florida right now, and will be brought to Las Vegas for the hearing," said court clerk Elana Pitaro.

A bondsman at You Ring We Spring bail bonds declined comment.

OJ Simpson was freed September 19 on $125,000 bail following his arrest on allegations that he and several "friends" burst into a Las Vegas hotel room and robbed two sports memorabilia dealers at gunpoint.

OJ Simpson's latest round of trouble has him in custody yet again.

Simpson is in hot water because he allegedly called one of his co-defendants in the Las Vegas armed robbery case, a court official said. Identifying himself as "Miguel," O.J. telephoned Clarence "C.J." Stewart on November 16 and expressed frustration with Stewart's testimony at a preliminary hearing.

A bail bondsman is a person or company that pledges money as collateral (bail), guaranteeing the appearance of a criminal defendant in court.

Bondsmen generally charge a fee of 5-10 percent of the total amount of the bail required in order to post a bond for the defendant.

Apparently - details remain scarce - O.J. Simpson's bail was posted by a such a company, which is now holding him on violation of the terms of his bail.

O.J. Simpson, 60, pleaded not guilty to 12 criminal counts in connection with what prosecutors contend was a kidnapping and armed robbery.

At a November preliminary hearing, a judge ordered the former football great and two of his co-defendants to stand trial on the charges.

Prosecutors allege Simpson and five men burst into a room at the Palace Station Hotel and held two memorabilia dealers against their will.

Simpson said he was merely taking back items that belonged to him, but one of the two alleged victims described it as a "military-style invasion."

The case will likely hinge on whether there were guns involved. But one of the men who aided O.J. - and subsequently testified against him in exchange for a plea bargain - said the Juice wanted to "get some heat."

by Free Britney at . Comments

Actress Katherine Heigl - of Grey's Anatomy, Knocked Up and now 27 Dresses fame - appears on the cover of the February issue of Cosmopolitan.

We could provide you with excerpts from the interview, but we know attention spans are short, so we'll spare you her typical outspoken comments and focus on the simple, enjoyable fact that Katherine Heigl is hot as hell ...

Katherine Heigl Bikini Photo

Katherine Heigl: The Fun Fearless Female of the Year, or something.

Making this sexy, cleavage-baring cover shot of Katherine even better: the words "arouse," "butt," "thighs," "sex position," "pleasure triggers" and "g-spot."

Good grief, Cosmo. What are you trying to do to us here!?

Of course, there's also a thumbnail of that douchebag John Mayer. Guess every silver, titillating lining has its dark, large-domed cloud.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Monday, January 14.

This is shaping up to be one of the most important days of Britney Spears' life. No, not because she's gonna show us her crotch. Although she might!

As you might recall, in the aftermath of Britney's meltdown last week, the judge stripped her of all custody and visitation rights regarding her sons, Sean Preston and Jayden James, until the January 14 hearing.

If she has any hope of getting her kids back, TMZ cites sources close to the case saying that Britney sure as hell better show up - and cooperate.

Should Britney Spears pull one of her trademark no-shows, or cause a scene, or act at all disrespectful in court, it could be curtains for her custody case.

Moreover, police sources say Commissioner Scott Gordon will hear firsthand eyewitness accounts of Thursday's epic meltdown from the LAPD, firefighters and paramedics who were on scene at Britney's mansion.

We don't imagine that will be a pretty picture.

In any case, the L.A County Sheriff's Department isn't taking any chances come Monday - they're ready for anything. If Britney Spears loses it or commotion breaks out in court, they will there to "handle" the situation.

Get ready, celebrity gossip fans
. This could be a circus. We just hope Britney and Adnan Ghalib turn up before then and she remembers to go.

UPDATE: A source close to the case reports that Mark Vincent Kaplan, Kevin Federline's attorney, may ask in court that Britney Spears' visitation rights "be cut off completely until a trial in April." Stay tuned.

by Mischalova at . Comments

It looks like the pregnancy bug that's bitten so many American stars - from Halle Berry to Jamie Lynn Spears to Nicole Kidman - has sailed across the ocean.

The UK's Daily Mail is reporting that Carla Bruni is pregnant by French President Nicolas Sarkozy. As has been widely reported, the former supermodel turned pop singer has been dating the world leader for two months; the couple became engaged earlier this month.

Carla Bruni Nude Photo

A wedding is rumored to be set for February 9.

Carla Bruni reportedly had an ultrasound at American Hospital in the Paris suburb of Neuilly last week. Indeed, French President Sarkozy has pulled a Cash Warren and knocked up his girlfriend.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Roger Clemens isn't the only sports star tied to steroids and making news this week - although all that's at stake for him are his Hall of Fame chances.

Marion Jones wishes she was so lucky.

Already stripped of many, many medals over her steroid use, a judge has just sentenced the disgraced Olympic champion to six months in prison.

Jones, 31, had begged a judge to keep her out of the slammer. She was one of the most celebrated female athletes in the world - until, you know, it was revealed she routinely used performance-enhancing drugs. Class.

Recently, Marion Jones admitted to lying to a federal investigator in 2003 and confessed that she took steroids "several times before the Sydney Olympics and continued using it after." You don't say. Great role model, isn't she?

On October 5, Marion Jones formally pled guilty to lying to Federal investigators in the BALCO steroid investigation in U.S. District Court.

At the time of her admission and subsequent guilty plea, Marion Jones was one of the most famous athletes - along with baseball stars Barry Bonds, Jason Giambi and Gary Sheffield - to be linked to the BALCO investigation.

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