by Free Britney at . Comments

At this rate, The Hills' plastic princess may rack up fewer albums sold than surgeries. That's us dissing both Heidi Montag's plastic surgery obsession and music!

In its first week of release, the aspiring singer's album, Superficial, which she hilariously compared to Michael Jackson's Thriller, has sold under 1,000 copies.

Heidi Pratt Topless

That's about 109,999,000 fewer than Thriller, for those keeping score.

It gets worse for the 'Tag. The album sold only 658 downloads so far.

She's a fairly well-known reality star too, so that number is probably a lot worse than it sounds. And she wonders why no record label gave her a deal ...

Heidi Montag might want to stick to staged photo ops for income.

Last week, Heidi said (hopefully sarcastically) that she went broke making Superficial but thought "within the first week, we will definitely make our money back."

"I put every dollar I have into this. I've spent over $1 million, almost $2 million, on this album," she told Entertainment Weekly last week in an interview.

"It's cost as much or more than a Britney Spears album because I wanted it to be that quality. The songs will make an impact in pop history."

The irony of that statement? It may very well make such an impact. Those "Worst Albums of the Decade" lists have to be populated by something!

Seriously, try to listen to this and not laugh your a$$ off.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Jon Cryer stars with Charlie Sheen on Two and a Half Men. Hopefully the kid on the show isn't involved in a scandal too, 'cause they're 2-for-2 1/2 right now.

Not that Cryer had anything to do with his, unlike Sheen. He has told authorities his life was in danger - possibly by a hit man - and the FBI is investigating.

Two and a Half Men Promotional Pic

Cryer sounded the alarm last Friday when he said believed his ex-wife hired a hit man to take him out. The two have been battling in a bitter custody fight.

According to reports, the FBI has been on this for a week, with no known suspects at this time. Cryer's ex-wife says she is unaware of any threat against Jon.

Security descended on the set the show last Friday. This week's show will also be taped without an audience ... but it's for creative, not security reasons.

No one to laugh at hilarious Two and a Half Men quotes? Tragic ...

Hopefully a hit man doesn't off Jon Cryer. That's scary stuff.

by Free Britney at . Comments

In his continued effort to clear Brittany Murphy's name, Simon Monjack says the meds found in her house after her tragic death December 20 belonged to him.

Murphy's husband says she had "laryngitis and flu-like symptoms" at the time of her sudden passing, but was not suffering from seizures, as has been reported.

In his first interview since his wife's death, Simon Monjack says many of the prescription medications found in the house at the time of Murphy's death were his.

Monjack, himself an oral cancer survivor, says he suffers from migraines and seizures as well as a heart condition. "I've had seizures," the screenwriter says.

"We're still trying to establish [why]."

Simon Monjack wed Brittany Murphy in 2007.

He says most of the medications in the Hollywood Hills home he shared with Murphy and her mother, Sharon, were for his own health issues, not Brittany's.

He says Murphy used Vicoprofen to relieve pain from severe menstrual cramps. "She was on an antibiotic and was taking cough medicine," says Monjack.

The grieving spouse believes her death was triggered by a congenital heart murmur. "No [medications] that could have possibly led to her heart attack."

The actress's mother, Sharon, insists that Murphy did not do drugs, and had a naturally "bubbly" personality. "She never even drank," Sharon said.

Toxicology results to determine the cause of death are still pending.

by Free Britney at . Comments

Scott Baio caused a stir on Twitter after posting a photo of Michelle Obama and being flat-out bombarded with angry replies from fans and enemies alike.

Some called the actor - who has often used his Twitter page to speak out about his Republican beliefs - an "a$$hole" and many said his post was racist.

Racist? Doubtful. In truth, it was just a tasteless joke.

Scott wrote "He [Barack] wakes up to this every day" combined with a really unflattering photo. People quickly jumped on him from all angles for this.

Follow the link above to see the pic he posted. Too far?

Michelle Obama's fans have lashed out at Scott Baio.

Baio insisted the post was just a joke, however, and shared screen caps of several death threats he received. That may be a little extreme as well, people.

"Easy to find your house Scottie boy and finish you," one commenter wrote while another threatened to harm his wife and family. Wow, take a joke much?

While calling the First Lady ugly and mocking the appearance of Michelle Obama pictures isn't likely to win friends, it also doesn't warrant death threats.

This isn't the first time an unflattering Michelle pic has made news. Google issued a statement in November with regard to an offensive image search result.

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Tara Reid has found someone to love her plastic surgery-ravaged body... until death does him part!

Michael Axtmann proposed to the actress on Monday night at the The Little Door restaurant in Los Angeles. Reid's rep shared the news with People:

"Michael surprised Tara with a beautiful round brilliant cut ring. Tara was so happy, and the other patrons clapped and yelled out, 'Congratulations.'"

The couple got together last year. Sources say they're planning a small wedding for family and friends this summer.

Next month, meanwhile, the entire world will get a glimpse at what Axtmann sees every morning, as Reid poses naked for Playboy. Yikes!

Tara Reid and Michael Axtmann

by Free Britney at . Comments

Jessica Simpson sported a remarkably subdued ensemble at the premiere of Extraordinary Measures Tuesday night. We hardly recognized it was Jess.

The alleged singer toned everything down, covering up with a turtleneck and black leggings. Seriously, that's Jessica. So little skin showing, it's surprising!

While leggings as pants are always a bit questionable (Gossip Girl fashion has taught us some things), but we like the conservative, all-black effect overall.

Surely good "friend" Billy Corgan would agree. Actually, maybe he'd prefer something wilder. How do you feel about Jess' new look? Vote in our poll below!

Jessica Simpson Fashion Photo

Jessica covers up for a change! [Photo: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

Jessica Simpson's latest style statement is ...

 

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Neither Kim Kardashian nor Lindsay Lohan possesses much talent or body weight.

But while the former at least has the support of her family, poor Lindsay has been throwing the tabloid wolves by her ex-convict of a father and attention whore of a mother. The result, sadly, has been rumors of drug use and cutting.

Therefore, we can forgive Lohan's unoriginal sense of fashion. She does have a lot on her mind these days.

This may explain why Lindsay's Brian Lichtenberg dress at this month's InStyle Golden Globes after-party was the exact same outfit worn by Kardashian a few weeks earlier in Las Vegas.

Compare the stars below and then vote for the sexiest:

Kim vs. Lindsay

Who looks best in this dress?

 

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Miranda Kerr is a Victoria's Secret lingerie model.

But, much to the delight of men everywhere, she often forgets the lingerie part.

Last summer, the beauty paraded around the beach with only a bikini bottom on, which is actually more than she once donned on the cover of Rolling Stone.

Now, Orlando Bloom's girlfriend has taken it all off for GQ. According to that magazine's fashion director, Kerr has "no qualms about being naked. Her body is flawless."

Wanna see for yourselves? You're in luck, fellas. Sit back and ogle away over the ridiculously hot pics below....

Nude Miranda Kerr Nude
  • Topless Tease
  • Stripping Down
  • Miranda Kerr Naked Photo

Note to Askmen.com: it's not too late to reconsider Emmanuelle Chriqui as the most desirable woman on the planet.

by Free Britney at . Comments

If you thought Britney Spears had recovered her lost marbles after two years of relative calm, think again, say hotel staffers who have seen her Stewie impression.

According to reports, Britney, who has a history of odd behavior (and British accents, no less) is baffling staff by impersonating the baby from Family Guy.

The pop star has taken to trotting around the Mondrian Hotel reciting Family Guy quotes and mimicking the troubled child, who speaks with a British accent.

Driving Miss Crazy Pants

Is Britney Spears slowly losing it again?

A source said: "Britney has developed a real fascination for Family Guy. She's been staying in the hotel's penthouse suite and has been watching box sets."

"She really likes Stewie and has been trying to copy his British accent. It's a bit weird, though, especially when she's in the gym speaking like a camp Brit."

We have nothing to add.

For those unfamiliar with Stewie, who's voiced by Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane, he's obsessed with world domination and plots to kill his own mother.

Sounds kinda like Britney, come to think about it! If her feud with dad Jamie keeps escalating, he should probably watch his back, too! Girl's gone haywire!

Stewie From Family Guy

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Seriously, is anyone on Team Jay?!?

While David Letterman and other talk show hosts have made their feelings known on Leno and the NBC late-night mess, other celebrities are now speaking out. Take it away, Rosie O'Donnell!

"It was a really crappy move on Leno's part," the former View co-host said. "Conan moved his family across the country and his entire staff to get a shot at what he worked 17 years for only to get it taken away by the bully on the playground who doesn't want to let go."

Rosie vs. Jay

Earlier this week, Leno pleaded innocence, as if he had no idea this was in the works at NBC. He even, mysteriously, told viewers not to blame Conan O'Brien for what's going on.

But Rosie thinks Jay should come clean and stop pretending to be America's male sweetheart.

"I think in the old days of show biz you can claim ignorance. But today with the internet, no way. There's no way people are going to buy the crap anymore."

Is anyone out there buying it? We're certainly not. Leno should have walked away years ago.

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