Week in Review

From ridiculous New Moon hype to Adam Lambert boyfriends to Rihanna interviews, it sure was an eventful week in the world of celebrity gossip.

As always, we've got it all covered in The Hollywood Gossip's Week in Review! Some of the highlights (and lowlights) from the past week:

• Hottest rumored couple of the week: Taylor squared. Sorry Robsten.
• Runners-up: Adam Lambert and Ferras Alqaisi. Sorry again Robsten.
• Sexiest ever New Moon hype (of this week): Robsten in Vanity Fair!
• Most useless star: Ashlee Simpson, who can't act and no one likes.
• Most moving prose: William Shatner reciting Levi Johnston's Tweets.
• Best reveal: The Carrie Prejean sex tape by Miss California officials.
• Least shocking news: Australia learns Britney Spears lip-syncs live!
• Most bitter, publicity-crazed family feud: Lindsay vs. Michael Lohan.

Lindsay Lohan and her dad continue to sling mud, while Rihanna shared her account of the beating she suffered at the hands of Chris Brown for the first time.

• In a two-part interview with ABC's Diane Sawyer on GMA and 20/20, Rihanna spoke about her assault at the hands of Chris Brown for the first time, and in graphic detail. Her message to fellow victims? Stand tall and eff love!
• Speaking of domestic violence, Bebe Winans has been banned by Oprah.
• Nicolas Cage is apparently broke. Buying islands and castles will do this.
• Atlanta stripper Nicole Forrester insists married Josh Duhamel hit that.
• Mel Gibson welcomed his eighth child, and first with Oksana Grigorieva.
• Jon Gosselin broke up with Hailey Glassman. And is still a giant d-bag.
• Obligatory Michael Jackson story of the week, courtesy Dr. Arnie Klein.

Don't forget to follow THG on Twitter for all of the latest Hollywood news, celebrity gossip, rumors, commentary and humor as it happens, 24/7/365.

Quite a week, wasn't it? We can't remember a crazier seven days of celebrity gossip and news since ... well, the week before this. But this one was still pretty solid.

Welcome to The Hollywood Gossip's Week in Review!

Some of the highlights (and lowlights) from the past week:

• Most subtle F-bomb dropped: This Arnold Schwarzenegger letter.
• Least subtle online plea for forgiveness: Chris Brown's RiRi Twittering.
• Most desperate fake mistress looking for 15 minutes:: Nicole Forrester.
• Least sane, potentially murderous stalker: Sean Christian Mathis.
• Only slightly less deranged (although funnier): This Miley fan.
• Oh, and this random Taylor Swift fanatic wasn't much better.
• Most absurd feud that absolutely refuses to die: Sarah Palin vs. Levi Johnston. He says she called her mentally challenged baby a retard. She replied suggesting Levi's a man-whore. He says he has info that can take her down. Etc.

Sarah Palin and Levi Johnston need to get in a cage fight already.

• Most excuse for a news story: Robsten breaking up. Were they even confirmed as a couple? Only by the same magazine that reported their split a week later.
• Least appropriate, borderline racist comment: Bob Griese's Taco Hell.
• Most exciting new couple like ever: Taylor Swift and Taylor Lautner.
• Least healthy couple ever: Blake Fielder-Civil and Amy Winehouse.
• Most decadent wedding ceremony: Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump.
• Least necessary child-pimping of the week: Billy Ray, on Noah Cyrus.
• Most overhyped release: Britney Spears' "3" music video. Sure, the publicity for Michael Jackson's This Is It was overkill, but at least the movie was good. And wasn't leaked five seconds at a time with a perfume ad.

Michael Jackson's This Is It debuted this week to general praise.

Don't forget to follow THG on Twitter for all of the latest Hollywood news, celebrity gossip, rumors, commentary and humor as it happens, 24/7/365.

Wow. What a week. We can't remember a crazier seven days of celebrity gossip since ... well, the week before this one. But it's been a wild ride just the same.

Welcome to The Hollywood Gossip's Week in Review!

Some of the highlights (and lowlights) from the past week:

• Worst texting: David Boreanz, to Rachel Uchitel, while his wife, Jaime Bergman, was giving birth. At least he walked into some way-too-easy Bones jokes.
• Worst excuse for justice: Travolta extortion case mistrial.
• Worst party foul: Stephanie Pratt getting popped for DUI.
• Best planned collaboration: Lady Gaga and Adam Lambert.
• Best tell-all name: Unsweetined (a Jodie Sweetin memoir).
• Best tabloid kover: Kim Kardashian "having a baby."
• Worst acting job: also Kim, on Brothers. Wow.
• Speaking of celebrity gossip mainstays who try to act but just can't, Ashlee Simpson-Wentz got fired from Melrose Place. Not a moment too soon.
• She should just stick to posing for magazines. They like to pay big money for just about any reason. Exhibit A: Kendra Wilkinson pregnancy pics.

Random Sex Scandal of the Week winners Brooke Hundley and Steve Phillips!

• ESPN analyst Steve Phillips gave us this week's random sex scandal, and it was a doozy, thanks to mistress Brooke Hundley, 22, his assistant at work.
• Brooke went ca-ra-zy, harassing Steve's wife, Marni Phillips, with texts, calls and a letter she dropped off in person, resulting in a frenzied 911 call.
• Speaking of 911 calls, Richard Heene, the father of Balloon Boy, was so full of BS when he first reported his son missing, we can smell it from here.
• Police released text messages between slain NFL star Steve McNair and killer Sahel Kazemi. He was also tied to a second mistress, Leah Ignagni.
• On a happier note, Marge Simpson Playboy photos were revealed. We know, it's all kind of weird, but people seem really interested in them.
• These Robsten pictures are actually much hotter!
• Man, oh man, Lindsay Lohan is a train wreck.

This is how Lindsay looks in court! Imagine her on the prowl at night!

Don't forget to follow THG on Twitter for all of the latest Hollywood news, celebrity gossip, rumors, commentary and humor as it happens, 24/7/365.

What a week it's been. The craziest we can remember since... well, last week. Below, we take a look back at the defining moments of the past seven days in celeb gossip.

Welcome to THG's Week in Review!

Some of the highlights (and lowlights):

• Worst boss ever: Ralph Lauren fired Filippa Hamilton for being fat.
• Worst faked sex tape ever: The Shauna Sand sex tape. It's gross.
• Worst Twitter use ever: Soulja Boy just had to prove he's that rich.
• Worst National Anthem ever: Jesse McCartney forgets the lyrics.
• Worst excuse ever: Jon Gosselin claims he withdrew $180,000 from his account with Kate he thought it was payday. A judge made him give it back.
• In other Jon news, he's apparently a sketchy computer hacker. And his a$$ is being sued by TLC for breaching his contract. Never a dull moment.
• Six-year-old Falcon Heene, a.k.a. Balloon Boy, took the country by storm when he was believed to have been carried off by a homemade helium balloon.
• Turns out he was in the attic the whole time, hiding out as the world went nuts trying to rescue him. It reeks of a hoax. The kid himself sort of said so.

As memorable flashes in the celebrity gossip pan go, Balloon Boy Falcon Heene (center) and his eccentric, possibly-fame-seeking Colorado family may be tough to beat.

• The feel good article of the week: This Jaycee Dugard cover story.
• We've decided there can never be enough Taylor Lautner shirtless.
• Or jokes about Jessica Simpson's non-existent weight gain.
• Or completely nonsensical Robsten gossip. So funny.
• Or January Jones pics. Those are pretty awesome.
• Miley Cyrus has lost her Twitter. And her spirits.
• Meghan McCain, daughter of U.S. Sen. John McCain, caused quite a stir with an online photo. The Meghan McCain Twitter photo showed - gasp! - cleavage!
• She admitted it wasn't wise to post, but denied she's a slut and said the only reason she was criticized for the pic is that she has breasts. Kind of true.

This Meghan McCain Twitter photo caused one heck of a media stir.

Don't forget to follow THG on Twitter for all of the latest Hollywood news, celebrity gossip, rumors, commentary and humor as it happens, 24/7/365.

What a week. Below, our staff takes a look back at the defining moments of the past seven days in celebrity gossip, one of the most exciting since ... well, last week.

Welcome to THG's Week in Review!

Some of the highlights (and lowlights):

• Kate Gosselin said Jon stole all their money and she can no longer pay bills. Jon said Kate is an abusive monster who he can't tolerate. The Gosselin kids, along with the rest of the freaking world, are sick of both of them.
• Embattled by sex and extortion scandals, David Letterman apologized to his wife on the air. His mistress, Stephanie Birkitt, may have cheated on her boyfriend, Dave's alleged blackmailer Robert Halderman, sparking jealousy.
• President Barack Obama somehow won the Nobel Peace Prize. Even after an SNL skit took some (funny) shots at the chief exec's lack of accomplishments.
• Miley Cyrus deleted her Twitter. This was devastating to her millions of fans. And dad Billy Ray, who begged her to reconsider, as the world needs her.

Miley Cyrus' deletion of her Twitter left the world imperiled.

• ESPN the Magazine puts Serena Williams nude on the cover. Hot? Not?
• Kourtney Kardashian is having a boy! Yay for publicity her and Scott!
• Just when you think Levi Johnston can't stoop any lower to cash in ...
• Kevin Federline is gross, quite possibly the world's biggest dirtbag.
• So much forced drama on The Hills, so many commercials on MTV.
• Taylor Lautner is absolutely freaking ripped. And swoon-inducing.
• Marge Simpson in Playboy: WTH? Classy? Funny? Weird? Sexy?

Don't forget to follow THG on Twitter for all of the latest Hollywood news, celebrity gossip, rumors, commentary and humor as it happens, 24/7/365.

Below, our staff takes a look back at some of the defining moments of the past week in celebrity gossip, which was the most exciting since ... well, probably last week.

It's THG's Week in Review!

Some of the highlights were:

• Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom actually got married. Seriously. We were sure it was all a ratings-generating sham, but there are wedding pictures.
• Miley Cyrus scores a cameo in the Sex and the City sequel. And Twitters about being in pain. And dances on stage as if she loves taking it from behind.
• A David Letterman extortion plot was revealed after the talk show host admitted on air that he was being targeted for a past affair with a staff member.
• The woman in question? Stephanie Birkitt, a former Late Show staffer who began working with Dave in the late 1990s (their relationship ended in 2003).
• Dave also may have dated Holly Hester.
• The alleged culprit? Robert Halderman (pictured), a CBS producer who arraigned in a Manhattan court and pleaded not guilty after his arrest Thursday.

Robert Halderman is accused of blackmailing David Letterman.

• Britney Spears releases her latest sex-themed single, "3."
• Amy Winehouse rapped. It's even freakier than it sounds.
• The Hills is back. It is everything we thought it could be.
• We was already there with fans, but Adam Lambert hit #1.
• Jon and Elizabeth Edwards may be headed for a divorce.
• Obligatory Jon and Kate Gosselin news: The douchebag was allegedly fired, and the show renamed Kate Plus 8. He then said he was going to quit the show anyway and pretended to care about his eight kids.
• Kate slammed this as just another PR stunt. Sigh. As Jon's new soul mate Hailey Glassman eloquently put it on her Twitter page, Jon and Kate drama has "taken over the entire world." For better or for worse.

Don't forget to follow THG on Twitter for all of the latest Hollywood news, celebrity gossip, rumors, commentary and humor as it happens, 24/7/365.

Welcome to The Hollywood Gossip's Week in Review.

Below, we take a look back at some of the LOL and WTH moments, shocking celebrity scandals and news stories that made this week by far the best week of Hollywood gossip and rumors since ... well, last week.

Some of the highlights from the past seven days:

• Howard K. Stern, Dr. Khristine Eroshevich and Dr. Sandeep Kapoor were all arraigned on felony charges in the 2007 death of Anna Nicole Smith.
• Khloe Kardashian seems poised to actually marry Lamar Odom Sunday. And milk every last second of it for as much publicity as she can garner.
• Randy Quaid's wife, Evi Quaid, is apparently kind of crazy. Neither of them apparently enjoy paying bills for the nice B&Bs they stay at, either.
• Mackenzie Phillips revealed she was raped by her dad. That's horrifying. It was corroborated by her half-sister Chynna Phillips. It got even weirder when she revealed she likely aborted his baby ... but he wasn't a monster.

Mackenzie Phillips' revelations about her drug-addled, incestuous past dominated news.

• This week in celebrity babies: Ellen Pompeo and Chris Ivery, Sarah Michelle Gellar and Freddie Prinze, Jr., and Samantha Burke all had their first kids!
• Quote of the Week: "I think it's important to point out that I was actually black before the election." - a deadpanning President Obama on Letterman
• LOL Claim of the Week: Mark-Paul Gosselaar was on steroids during Saved By the Bell: The College Years, alleges former co-star Dustin Diamond.
• Stephanie Sterling is the latest to say Jon Gosselin hit that. Although she is likely not the last. Meanwhile, Hailey Glassman supposed got a boob job.
• Careful. Jennifer Aniston is very fragile and may break at any moment.
• Cutest 1-2 American Idol punch ever: Kris Allen and David Archuleta!
• Miley Cyrus is totally sort of officially dating Liam Hemsworth now!
• John Edwards may soon admit he fathered a kid with Rielle Hunter.
• Aubrey O'Day pretends to be sad, pissed about people ogling her.

Welcome, readers of The Hollywood Gossip, to our Week in Review.

Below, we take a look back at some of the LOL moments, outbursts and news stories that made this week one of the best we can remember ... this month.

Some highlights from the past seven days:

• R.I.P.: Patrick Swayze passed away at the age of 57.
• In a move that spawned universal criticism and more than one hilarious parody, and will surely haunt him for years, Kanye West hjiacked Taylor Swift's speech with a belligerent tirade at the MTV Video Music Awards.
• West apologized many times and Swift accepted, but you know it's bad when the President of the United States calls you a jackass off the record before giving an interview, then doesn't even get any flak for it.
• In other VMA news, Alicia Keys and Jay-Z's performance of "Empire State of Mind" was really, really good. So moving, in fact, that Lil Mama decided to crash it. We have no idea who that is, but it was funny.
• Also funny? Stephanie Pratt's plastic surgery. Yikes.

Jay Leno asks what all of America is thinking ... WTH, Kanye?!

• Jon Gosselin's ex-nanny, Stephanie Santoro, says Jon had sex with her nine times at his house during their brief fling, then asked her to lie about it.
• He denied those claims, as well as accusations from ex-wife Kate Gosselin (a.k.a. Katezilla) that he brought Hailey Glassman to meet the children.
• On a positive note, Jon is reportedly coming out with a new clothing line, called Douchebag Gosselin Gear, while Kate's new hairstyle is not awful!
• Khloe Kardashian klaims to be getting married soon.
• Chris Brown picks up trash, then gets called out by Tila.
• O.J. is totally a murderer, girlfriend Christie Prody says.
• How low can Katie Price go? No clue, but pretty low.
• Kevin Skinner has the most talent in all of America.
• A lucky coyote ate Jessica Simpson's dog for dinner.
• OMG: An extended New Moon trailer was unveiled.
• Rob and Kristen are also getting married ... on set.

Welcome, celebrity gossip readers across this great nation and world, to The Hollywood Gossip's Week in Review, in which we take a look back at what made this maybe the most exciting week of celeb news since ... last week.

Some of the top stories of the past seven days:

• For Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson is risking it all.
• Just hope he doesn't take Jen Aniston's love advice.
• Jon Gosselin gave an explosive interview on ABC's Primetime. In summation, he despises Kate and says Hailey Glassman is his soul mate.
• Instead of Meredith Grey's Anatomy, Ellen Pompeo's husband Chris Iver, may be inspecting that of Rachel Artz. We mean sleeping with her.
• Hugh Hefner is divorcing Kimberley Conrad Hefner. Yes. Hugh is married, and has been since '89! Also, Hef is apparently really, really rich.
• Joe Wilson, a Republican Congressman from South Carolina, made headlines with his "You lie!" outburst during President Obama's speech.

No word if Joe Wilson is also irate about Ellen joining American Idol.

• American Idol tapped Ellen DeGeneres as a full time judge. Can't say we saw that coming, but at least Paula Abdul wished her good luck.
• Are Evan Rachel Wood and Alexander Skarsgard more than co-stars?
• Tila Tequila alleges assault at the hands of beau Shawne Merriman.
• Khloe Kardashian is dating Lamar Odom! Kourtney's still pregnant.
• Whitney Port broke up with Freddie Fackelmayer. They were dating.
• We called Miley Cyrus a Twittering twit for writing that she really missed her pappy. We sort of misinterpreted the singer's comment.
• Speaking of twits, Lindsay Lohan may take the cake, with incoherent online rants to Sam, followed by her voicemail being hacked.

Welcome, celebrity gossip obsessives, to The Hollywood Gossip's Week in Review.

Below, we take a look back at the stories that made this easily the most exciting week since ... well, since last week. Some of the major highlights:

• The Eclipse characters of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are engaged!
• The Hills Season 5 trailer was released, and the drama looks fake as ever.
• Gabriel Aubry got Halle Berry pregnant again! Congratulations to those two!
• In related news, Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar are expecting baby #19. 19.
• Levi Johnston said Sarah Palin wanted to adopt baby Tripp and keep Bristol's pregnancy secret, then quit as Governor to get rich. Sounds about right.
• Chris Brown told Larry King he didn't even remember beating Rihanna, then later clarified and said that yes, of course he remembers pummeling her.
• The official release date for Adam Lambert's debut album was announced. Idiot protesters still feel the glam rocker is some sort of rebel against God.

Adam Lambert is hugely popular ... save for his insane detractors.

• Jon Gosselin hosted a pool party in Vegas, then sat down with Good Morning America to bash ex-wife Kate as a grating harpee who neglects their kids.
• Speaking of Good Morning America, Whitney Houston's comeback fell flat.
• Maia Campbell apparently exists. And stars in this apparent crack video.
• Tony Romo is dating Candice Crawford, sister of Gossip Girl star Chace.
• Jon Voight is losing it, and not exactly what we'd call a fan of health care.
• Michelle Obama's hair sparked debate, as it does on a recurring basis.
• On a similar note, Paris Jackson's new haircut sent security scrambling.
• Her dad, Michael Jackson, was finally laid to rest in a private funeral.