by Tyler Johnson at . Comments

Beginning today, FXX will air all 552 (!) episodes of The Simpsons in chronological order. 

It'll be the longest such marathon in TV history, and while Simpsons fans are an obsessive lot, we doubt many will be up to the task of watching the entire 12-day stretch. (Though we wouldn't be surprised if some careers and marriages are sacrificed in the attempt.)

Pinning down the best episodes from the iconic series' 25-season run is a nigh impossible task, but here's a list of 17 indispensable installments. Use it as a guide, set your DVR, and hopefully maintain your employment:

Bart gets Hit By a Car (Season 2)
One of the first episodes to delve into the depths of C. Montgomery Burns' true evil. Better yet, it features the first appearances of Springfield sleazeballs Dr. Nick Riviera and attorney Lionel Hutz (voiced by the late Phil Hartman).

Of course, no show can remain consistently brilliant for two-and-a-half decades, so naturally some days will require more of your time than others.

The marathon began at 10 this morning with the pilot/Christmas special "Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire," and while that episode is rife with sentimental appeal for those of us old enough to remember its debut, the general consensus among fans is that Groening and company didn't really hit their stride until season 3.

The show's true glory days may have begun with the Conan O'Brien-penned "Marge Vs. the Monorail," but like all things Simpsons, that's a matter of tense debate amongst fans.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Damon Salvatore is alive and well, folks.

Or maybe just alive.

Ian Somerhalder Tweeted a photo this week of our first look at his character on The Vampire Diaries Season 6, leaving many to wonder just why Damon has a chin full of blood.

The veteran vampire concluded Season 5 by holding Bonnie's hand and getting sucked into... well, we have no idea where. The Other Other side, we guess?

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

25 years ago today, the television world was introduced to the largest cellphone ever known to man.

And also to The Max. And to The Sprain. And to special handshakes, crazy high school hijinks, caffeine pills and an athlete who somehow played like 12 sports over the course of one school year.

Oh, yes, readers, it's the quarter-century anniversary of Saved by the Bell!

The most iconic Saturday morning program of all-time debuted 25 years ago today on NBC, with the cast now back in the news because Lifetime will air the Unauthorized Saved by the Bell Story on September 1.

Mark Paul Gosselaar
Zach Morris was every 90s girl's teen crush, and he's still a super hottie! Mark Paul Gosselaar has been on NYPD Blue and most recently Franklin and Bash.

That TV movie will be based on a book by former sex tape star Dustin Diamond and may forever alter the way we look at Zack, Kelly, Slater and company.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Don Pardo, the voice behind Saturday Night Live for 38 seasons, passed away on Monday, according to his daughter.

He was 96 years old.

Don Pardo for SNL

Pardo broke into broadcasting at a small radio station in Providence, Rhode Island and moved to New York City in 1944 to begin his six-decade tenure as a staff announcer at NBC.

You may not know his face, but you’ve heard his voice:

Transitioning to television, Pardo announced for such shows as Jeopardy!, The Kate Smith Evening Hour, NBC Nightly News, The Price Is Right, Three on a Match and Winning Streak.

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by Tyler Johnson at . Comments

Earlier today, we reported that conservative pundit S.E. Cupp auditioned for The View, and was found to be a bad fit with the rest of the cast.

Rosie O'Donnell and Whoopi Goldberg apparently carry a clout when it comes to choosing replacements for Jenny McCarthy and Sherri Shepherd, and it now looks as though they've settled on two co-hosts everyone can agree on.

Radar Online reports that Nicolle Wallace and October Gonzalez have been chosen to fill the vacant chairs at the round table after a long, divisive selection process.

  • October Gonzalez
  • Nicolle Wallace

Wallace briefly served as Director of Communications for the Bush White House, and was a senior advisor for John McCain's 2008 presidential campaign.

Gonzalez -  the wife of former Atlanta falcons tight end, Tony Gonzalez - has little in the way of television experience, but she reportedly wowed audiences and co-hosts alike during her audition.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

A familiar face is on her way back to The Real Housewives of New Jersey.

Multiple outlets (TMZ, Us Weekly) confirm that producers have devised a way to spice of what they believe to be a boring season. Isn't that right, Jacqueline Laurita?

The reality star was let go from Bravo last year, but only because she was preoccupied with family issues and had "lost her edge," insiders tell TMZ.

Jacqueline Laurita Close Up

Hoping she's now found it again, The Real Housewives of New Jersey will actually shoot additional footage with Laurita in it in order to add excitement to Season 6.

"They were planning on taping some new scenes anyway" for the September sentence of Teresa Giudice and her husband on fraud charges, according to Us Weekly.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

They are royal pains, so it only makes sense they will appear on Royal Pains:

USA Network has confirmed via press release that Khloe Kardashian and Scott Disick will portray themselves Royal Pains Season 6 finale.

The episode will air September 2 and it will find Khloe and Scott having dinner at a local hot spot when Hank's girlfriend, Charlotte, spots the "pop culture icons" (USA's words, not ours) and asks Evan to make an introduction.

  • Khloe in Las Vegas
  • Scott Disick in Da Club

Khloe and Scott are long-time "partners in crime," according to the reality star herself.

She actually Tweeted those words in regard to Disick and the fact that both have been arrested for drunk driving.

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by Tyler Johnson at . Comments

If Elisabeth Hasselbeck was just too darn liberal for you, you may be in for a treat, you betcha:

Back in it was reported that Sarah Palin might join The View alongside returning co-host Rosie O'Donnell.

Thumbs Up From Sarah Palin

The talk died down amidst rumors that Meghan McCain and Leah Remini were fighting it out for the job.

With word that Palin was launching her own "online TV network" it became increasingly unlikely that the former Alaska governor would ever join the "lamestream" media.

Earlier today, however, Radar Online reported that Palin is closer than ever to reaching an agreement with producers of The View

In fact, there's reportedly only one thing preventing Palin from sealing the deal - she doesn't want to abandon her view of Russia:

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by Tyler Johnson at . Comments

To paraphrase Tobias Funke, we just prematurely blew our wads.

The Huffington Post reported today that Netflix is "positive" another season of Arrested Development is on its way.

Arrested Development Cast Photo

The online streaming service resurrected the beloved Fox sitcom last year, and while Arrested Development season 4 met with mixed reviews (cast scheduling conflicts resulted in an unusual narrative structure that left some fans cold), the experiment was enough of a success that the Bluths will be invited back for another go-round.

While the show has yet to start production and there are some details left to be ironed out, Netflix Chief Content Officer Ted Sarandos says there's no doubt that fans will be treated to a fifth season, adding, "It's just a matter of when."

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

So... who's with me?

FX has come out with the first trailer for Sons of Anarchy Season 7 and it features Jax asking this question of his club, as they bear witness to a President who admits he no longer as a "vision."

Unless that vision is revenge-based.

The following footage features a numb Jax Teller, one who cares about nothing in the wake of his wife's murder except the future of SAMCRO. We also see a petrified Juice and a Gemma who is desperate to keep the truth from her son.

Sons of Anarchy revs up for its final season on Tuesday, September 9 at 10/9c with a special 90-minute premiere.

NOTE: Need to catch up? You can always watch Sons of Anarchy online via TV Fanatic.

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