by Hilton Hater at . Comments

If True Blood Season 7 Episode 5 wasn't the worst hour in the history of television, it was at the very least the worst hour in the history of this HBO drama.

It was horribly boring, nothing much happened, what did happened didn't make much sense, oh... and Lettie Mae is somehow still around!

Seriously, we never thought we'd be pushing for the return of Tara, but her mother is actually a million times more annoying. That's an impressive/awful feat to pull off.

Willa vs. Eric

What else made this episode so incredibly horrible?

Continue Reading...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

True Blood concluded one of the most boring and pointless episodes in series history with a shocking death tonight:

Rest in peace, Alcide Herveaux.

The werewolf was shot and killed after coming to Sookie's rescue after one of her dumbest plans to date, sitting in a field, waiting to be taken by the infected vampires... while annoyingly talking to Bill (sitting in a tree, about 20 feet away) the entire time.

Alcide, of course, spent a majority of the past couple seasons in his own storyline and then the series quickly got him together with Sookie to conclude True Blood Season 6 and then it fast-forwarded the action six months and asked viewers to somehow buy into this relationship.

So. Yeah. Hard to say we were much infested in Alcide's life or death, especially not when he was wearing a shirt.

Sitting Sookie

But at least Alcide's murder took us by surprise. At least it gave us something to talk about with friends.

The rest of True Blood Season 7 Episode 3 nearly made us fall asleep.

Continue Reading...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

One thing was made very clear on True Blood Season 7 Episode 2:

There will be no government bailout for Bon Temps, Louisiana.

No, the car industry in that town isn't dying... but its citizens have been, due to the influx of infected vampires on the loose. And Sookie and company discovered this week that FEMA was nowhere to be found when the neighboring city was overrun by these creatures.

Best of luck, Bon Tempers.

Visit to the Neighbors

And best of luck, Alcide. You may wanna just pack it in now, relationship-wise.

Continue Reading...

by Tyler Johnson at . Comments

Fans of True Blood may have noticed that the character of James had been recast for the seventh season premiere, with Luke Grimes being replaced by Nathan Parsons.

So why such an unexpected shake-up in the show's final season?

Well, according Buzzfeed, unidentified sources who worked on the series claim that Grimes insisted he be let out of his contract after learning that some of the unexpected gay sex in True Blood season 7 would be performed by his character.

Luke Grimes as James

Sources say Grimes "objected to the first few scripts he received," as they revealed that his character will be involved in a same sex relationship with Nelsan Ellis' Lafayette.

Grimes' agent denies the allegation claiming the actor was forced to exit the series due to a scheduling conflict.

Continue Reading...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Forget the True Blood Season 7 premiere, which aired last night on HBO and which featured a major character death before the opening credits even rolled.

And let’s focus instead on “True Mud,” a Sesame Street parody that bills itself as the “yuckiest show on television."

It centers on a grouch who just wants mud... you know, like a a vampire who would desire blood.

Yes, there's a lot of rhyming involved. But also a lot of humor and, of course, some education to boot. Check it out now:

Previously, Sesame Street has parodied Sons of Anarchy and The Hunger Games.

Continue Reading...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

So... who will be next?

On the shocking True Blood Season 7 premiere last night, Sookie lost her best friend - in the show's opening 30 seconds!

Prior to the credits even rolling, the final season of this HBO epic kicked off with infected vampire killing Tara and making their presence strongly felt in Bon Temps.

Will things get any better? Not before they get worse, that much is made clear in the following promo, which teases more town chaos to come this summer, along with kidnappings, killings and a possible reconciliation.

Which couple could be getting back together? Is Eric really gone? Will Lafayette find happiness?

We'll find out as the next few Sundays unfold. But you can get a long look ahead below via the following network teaser:

Continue Reading...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

We're off and running killing on True Blood Season 7.

The series set a personal record for Shortest Period of Time Elapsing in an Episode Before Murdering a Main Character, as Tara was destroyed before the opening credits even rolled.

Yes, TARA IS DEAD. Finally! For good this time... we hope!

It must be asked: was a single viewers upset by this development?

True Blood Season 7 Poster

Sookie, of course, took Tara's death (at the hands of an attacking set of infected vampires) very hard, blowing off Alcide after she read his thoughts and he, along with the rest of Bon Temps, blamed Sookie for this Hep V outbreak.

Seems like a bit of a stretch, doesn't it?

Continue Reading...

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Sookie Stackhouse knows vampires.

She knows them intimately. Biblically. Sexually, if you catch our drift.

But it's that knowledge of the undead that will have this character ostracized on True Blood Season 7 Episode 1, as this HBO epic kicks off its final season on Sunday at 9/8c.

The premiere will find Bon Temps overrun by infected vampires, with many residents blaming Sookie's initial hook-up with Bill for their presence.

She understands their anger. She isn't hoping to change their minds. But Sookie does want to help.

Watch her make a passionate plea to her loved ones in the following sneak peek and then head over to TV Fanatic to watch True Blood online:

by Tyler Johnson at . Comments

If you're already wondering how you'll get your sexy vampire fix after True Blood's final season comes to a close this summer, worry not: Sookie Stackhouse and company may be Broadway-bound.

True Blood Season 7 Photograph

True Blood creator Alan Ball is reportedly working with HBO and composer Nathan Barr to produce a musical version of the beloved HBO series.

Of course, in order to really stay true to the spirit of Bon Temps, the show would have to be a strictly 18-and-older affair.

"This was something that I pitched to Alan Ball and HBO," said Barr at a recent season seven premiere party. "I think we're really trying to return to the roots of the show."

In other words, don't expect all of your favorite vamps, werewolves, and telepathic fairies to appear on stage, as the musical will focus mainly on the beginning stages of Sookie's story.

Continue Reading...

by Tyler Johnson at . Comments

After shooting seven seasons on True Blood, Anna Paquin is no stranger to nudity.

Still, it's something of a surprise to see Anna gracing the cover of Entertainment Weekly completely nude, straddling her fully-clothed husband:

Stephen Moyer, Anna Paquin EW Cover

Of course, our first glimpse of True Blood season 7 seems to indicate that the show's final run will feature more sex than ever before. (And you didn't think it was possible!)

In fact, the new season doesn't even premiere until this Sunday and we're already shocked by True Blood's hyper-sexual content.

In his interview with EW, Moyer discusses directing a sex scene between his wife and Joe Manganiello:

Continue Reading...