The Shannon Twins
Gossip

Tonight, E! viewers will meet the new Girls Next Door, as Crystal Harris, Karissa Shannon and Kristina Shannon officially replaced Holly, Bridget and Kendra as Hugh Hefner's leading ladies.

Asked about the woman that's replaced her atop the Playboy Mansion girlfriend train, Madison said in a recent interview that Harris is her "clone," a description the busty blonde takes exception to.

“That is flattering because I wouldn’t compare myself saying that someone looks like me,” Crystal said to OK! Weekly of Holly’s comments. “I just think it’s flattering.”

Hmmm... we wonder where Holly ever would have gotten this comparison from.

Crystal Harris is the exact opposite of Holly Madison, if you don't count their hair color, fake boobs and shared penchant for banging old men.

Meanwhile, those hoping to get to know Kristina Shannon should check out her MySpage page, where the sex-crazed sibling writes:

"Love me without fear. Trust me without wondering. Love me without restrictions. Want me without demands. Accept me how I am. A love like that will be ETERNAL!"

It will also be good for ratings. Click on the photos below for larger images of the new (and improved?) Girls Next Door:

Sure, it might seem as though Crystal Harris is just using Hugh Hefner for fame and attention.

And, of course, one might assume the Playboy founder was only interested in sex with a much younger blonde.

But Harris tells E! News that her and Hefner actually have a lot in common. Like a passion for fun!

"We were both psychology majors in school... We laugh a lot together. We watch movies together. We love relaxing and having a good time and hanging out with the girls. We just keep it fun."

How did we ever doubt this couple? It's like a match made in busty heaven.

On October 11, fans will learn even more about this pair, as they star alongside Karissa and Kristina Shannon in a new version of The Girls Next Door.

What should viewers expect to discover about the young women that make love to such an old man?

"We're the wild ones and party animals, and Crystal's really calm and mellow," said Karissa, while her sister added: "We don't like the peacocks here. They poop everywhere, and they're loud."

That doesn't make them so different from Hef, does it?

Bridget Marquardt has a Travel Channel show and might come out with a new reality series.

But she just can't stay away from the Playboy Mansion and its wrinkly old owner of an ex-boyfriend!

Marquardt showed up this weekend at the large residence and got cozy with Hugh Hefner and his new set of girlfriends at the annual Midsummer Night’s Dream party.

Below, Bridget snuggles up with Karissa and Kristina Shannon, while Crystal Harris also played hosts to a numer of of celebrity guests at the event...

Click the photos above to wonder how the heck Hugh Hefner attracts such fine pieces of tail.

They haven't been having sex with a wrinkly old man for nothing!

After months of waking up with Metamucil in their hair for seemingly no reason, Crystal Harris, Karissa Shannon and Kristina Shannon are finally getting the official spotlight they signed on for:

Hugh Hefner has confirmed that he and his new trio of women will be filming a new season of The Girls Next Door.

"You are looking at part of the cast here," Hefner told Us Weekly over the weekend, pointing to his girlfriends. "We are going to have a lot of fun."

As supporters of Barack Obama, the Shannon Twins are doing their part to stimulate the economy. They're single-handedly responsible for keeping Viagra in business. [Photo: PacificCoastNewsOnline.com]

What can viewers expect on the new edition of the E! reality series, which previously followed around Kendra Wilkinson, Holly Madison and Bridget Marquardt?

"Fun and games!" Hef said.

Hugh Hefner threw his teen, twin girlfriends Karissa and Kristina Shannon a little soiree on Friday night to celebrate their special July/August Playboy photo spread.

Showing that there is plenty of Hefner's money to go around are no jealousy issues at all, Hef's #1 girlfriend Crystal Harris also came out to support the twins.

The naked spread was the Playboy debut for Karissa and Kristina Shannon, who dressed in matching getups and partied the night away as usual to celebrate.

Who would you rather ...

Hugh Hefner can't tell them apart. Will Playboy readers be able to?

Indeed, Karissa and Kristina Shannon are featured in the latest issue of the men's magazine. No shock there.

Somehow, though, the twins are clothed in the two photos that have been released.

Don't worry, fellas: we know where you can see Karissa and Kristina Shannon nude!

In the new issue, Karissa and Kristina sport matching sailor hats and jean shorts, continuing their tradition of dressing alike and doing everything together.

Including Hef, of course.

“We feel as if we’re one. In each other we always have a best friend,” the twins said, failing to mention that in one another, they also have an old, wrinkled penis.

"All girls have pretty mouths. Especially in the dark."
- Unknown philosopher

Hugh Hefner may want to take these wise words to heart.

His genuine romantic feelings for 19-year-old twin girlfriends Karissa and Kristina Shannon cannot be understated, even if the octogenarian can’t tell them apart.

“I have one little trick, one little mark,” Hefner confessed.

“But other than that, I don’t know.”

What about the long, soul-searching conversations that are the hallmark of love? Wait, you mean the Shannon Twins are only interested in sex and/or money?

We can't even believe what we're writing.

Who's who - and does it matter when they double-up on you?

Moving on to a happier, but also strange topic, Hugh Hefner also hopes Kendra Wilkinson’s unborn child will one day end up a Playboy model at the mansion.

“I’m sure the baby will end up at the mansion. We have a lot of friends, second generation Playmates," he said. "There are a lot of kids around these days.”

We'll have to ask Hank Baskett how he feels about this when his daughter turns 18. If they even have a daughter. Or Hef is around to mark the occasion.

Considering the constant parade of beautiful women in his bedroom, Hugh Hefner is not one to dwell on the past.

That's why he's confused about a report this week that claimed he wanted Holly Madison to move back into the Playboy Mansion (either that, or Hef is suffering from dementia; the guy is really, really old).

"I have no idea where these crazy stories come from," Hefner said in a statement. "The idea that I'm pining over former girlfriend Holly Madison and would 'welcome her back with open arms' is pure fiction. It was invented by someone to create publicity."

Hef said he doesn't think of Madison in that way anymore. After all, the guy is totally smitten with one to three women.

"I'm in love with Crystal Harris (pictured) and wouldn't trade her or the Shannon Twins for anyone in the past," he said. "Holly will always be welcome here at the mansion, but not as a girlfriend. I think she's happy now, and I know I am."

No offense to Holly, but Hef appears to have made the right decision. Harris is the hottest girlfriend he's had yet. We present the following photos of her as evidence:

Hey, that's just how life goes at the Playboy Mansion. Don't hate the players... or the game, for that matter. Just sit back and enjoy the show.

Why should half-nude pictures and possibly making love to a man four times your age take a break just because it's December 25? Exactly.

Below is Hugh Hefner's annual holiday card. This year's features his new, law-breaking girlfriends: sexy twins Karissa and Kristina Shannon.

Behold, The Shannon Twins nude except for body paint ...

HOLIDAY FUN: Between the Shannon Twins, Dasha Astafieva and whomever else he has waiting in the wings, Hugh Hefner has plenty of toys to play with this Christmas.

Hefner hooked up with the teenage twins after splitting with Girls Next Door stars Holly Madison (now with Criss Angel), Kendra Wilkinson (now engaged to Hank Baskett) and Bridget Marquardt (now MIA, but probably still half-naked).

As 2008 winds down, it's time to reflect upon those - from household names to relative unknowns, from A- to D-list - who made this year so memorable.

The Hollywood Gossip is unveiling 10 finalists for its 2nd Annual Celebrity of the Year award. They've given us their best, their worst, even their nude pictures in some cases. Now it is time for us to give something back with this moving tribute.

We previously profiled those silly moose-hunting child bearers from Alaska, The Palin Family. Today, we present Celebrity of the Year finalist #8 … The Many Girls Next Door!

When 2008 began, the girlfriends of Hugh Hefner could be counted on one hand: there was Holly Madison, the Playboy founder's number-one piece of tail; Kendra Wilkinson, the woman with the most annoying laugh on television; and Bridget Marquardt, the other one.

Soon enough, however, the exploits of these models became too much for a single reality show to handle.

Holly remained in the news by posing naked a lot and then having the awful taste to date Criss Angel; Kendra got engaged to NFL player Hank Baskett, and Bridget continued to exist.

Once these ladies established lives outside of the Playboy Mansion, they had to be replaced. Enter Karissa and Kristina Shannon, along with a series of arrests, obnoxious attitudes and, of course, very little clothing.

With 2008 coming to an end, a new Girl Next Door has even popped up: Dasha Astafieva will grace the cover of Playboy's 55th anniversary issue. Rumors have already circulated that she slept with Hefner while he was dating Holly, Kendra and Bridget.

As you click on the photos above and below of Hefner's girls from 2008, remember: the guy is 82 years old. Can you top his exploits in 2009?