The Real Housewives of New York City

Just when I thought this season of The Real Housewives of New York City might end up being the new housewives versus the old, "Diss-Invite" turned that fear upside down.

It's actually become all of the housewives against Ramona. Who saw that coming? So let's break it all down in our THG +/- recap.

First off, what do you think of the new housewives? When the opening conversation between Aviva and Carole consisted of what they'd eaten for breakfast…Aviva ate a hard boiled egg and Carole a sugar cookie for those who missed that fascinating tidbit…I thought about going to bed early. Minus 12.

Are these women just that boring or do I need to get some more sleep?

When Ramona showed up with gifts I was surprised by Aviva's comments. I realized that Ramona's pimping her own skin care line but it was still nice of her to hand out presents. Minus 5 to Aviva for the sarcasm.

Ramona's searching for Heather haters but it didn't seem to be working. As both Ramona and Heather talk too much a talking intervention was proposed. Wait. Would we still have a show if they all shut up?

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It's been known for awhile, but now it's confirmed: Jill Zarin will not appear again on The Real Housewives of New York City.

Zarin herself commented on her exit last September, while rumors then surfaced that Ramona Singer was responsible for the ousting. But Bravo has finally released a statement of its own on the matter, stating for the record:

"We wish Jill the best, but there is no consideration of her returning to the series.

The network, of course, overhauled this franchise's cast with Heather Thomson, Carole Radziwill and Aviva Drescher heading into its fifth season.

Ratings have been down a bit, however, leading to chatter that Zarin could return. Jill prompted that talk, too, when she told The New York Daily News recently: "I've reached out and offered [Bravo] any support they need" in order to boost viewership.

That will not come to fruition, though, it's now clear, while no new reality show featuring Zarin is in the works, either.

[Photo: WENN.com]

The Real Housewives of New York City somehow take a "Boozy Brunch" and turn in into a trip to London. Come on, admit it. You wish you could too.

We'll break down how they did it in THG's +/- recap!

What do you think of the new girls? I'm giving them a Minus 10. Were they really complaining about the traffic in NYC? Boring. This is not what I tuned in to see. I think they're making me miss the old crew.

And Ramona and Luann are already ditching them but Sonja joins their brunch and it quickly turns into drinks at a rooftop bar. Plus 8 for keeping things moving.

I'm not sure what to make of Aviva. On the one hand she has issues on top of her issues. My first instinct was to hit her with a Minus 9 for the multiple phobias.

She's afraid of flying, heights, and she's claustrophobic. Then she explains it stems from her traumatic childhood accident where she lost her leg and suddenly I feel like a heel so I'll add the points back with one extra.  Plus 10.

Aviva's husband, Reid joins the girls because Aviva needs the backup. Apparently it's the heights thing with the rooftop bar. Everyone is all aflutter because Reid doesn't wear a wedding ring and Sonja is downright appalled. 

Minus 11 for making such a big deal out of it. I think it's between Aviva and Reid and no one else's business. If the guy's going to cheat he's going to cheat. A metal band on his finger isn't about to stop him.

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The Real Housewives of New York City prove yet again that you can dress them up but you can't take them out. "Say What You Mean, Just Don't Say it Mean" gave everyone a chance to shine. Too bad no one actually did. 

We break down all of the fake smiles, fake friendships, and fake breasts in this week's official THG +/- recap!

Heather, Aviva and their husbands meet up for a fancy dinner on the town to get to know one another better. That sounds civil enough. That's until Heather breaks out with how well she knows Aviva's ex-husband. Apparently it's well enough that she knows he slept with both Luann and Sonja!

Minus 10. Is this really appropriate dinner conversation? Nothing like talking about your friend's ex's sex life to put her at ease.

But they also talked religion where Heather announces that although she's never officially converted to Judaism, she considers herself Jewish by injection for how long she's slept with her Jewish husband. Groan. Minus 8.

Aviva earns a Plus 11. When her hubby asks what's the worst that can go wrong when he goes dirt biking for the first time, Aviva responds with, "Yeah honey. You could lose a leg and we can match."  I know it's a bit morbid but it made me laugh.

Just when I thought this dinner would be the most awkward affair of the night, we move on to a meeting that's even worse.

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In a new interview with Lifestyle Mirror, Sonja Morgan comes up with an interesting theory for why people love The Real Housewives of New York City.

"If you sign up for reality TV, you have to be yourself," Morgan tells the publication. "People want to see how real people live. It makes people feel like they're not alone in the world."

Morgan adds that she was hesitant to sign on for the Bravo franchise at first because she "didn't know if it was going to be a cross between Jerry Springer and Desperate Housewives."

So why did she finally agree? Because of a 2006 split with her husband.

"I knew at that point my divorce settlement wasn't coming. I needed to support myself and my daughter in our townhouse," said Morgan, referring to the $6 million property in which she resides.

The Real Housewives of New York Season 5 kicked off this week with the introduction of new cast mates Aviva Drescher, Carole Radziwill and Heather Thomson. Did you tune in?

[Photo: WENN.com]

The Real Housewives of New York City kicked off season five with a new crew as half the originals are out and a new group of catty housewives introduced themselves.

We'll break down the feuds, both old and new, in THG's +/- recap!

We're quickly introduced to mother of four Aviva Drescher, widow and author Carole Radziwill, and new resident mean girl and shapewear diva Heather Thomson.

Plus 10 for throwing the newbies into the deep end at Sonja Morgan's party to see if they could swim. Do any of them have what it takes to survive in these shark infested waters?

Aviva's definitely the nicest of the bunch but how long will it last? It seems they all find their inner mean girl before long.

Plus 20 for the look on Sonja's face when Aviva pulled her spare prosthetic leg out of a bag to get a pedicure. I can't blame Sonja for being shocked. If Aviva wouldn't have said she was missing part of her leg from a childhood accident I never would have known.

Carole's story was interesting even if she did come off a little bland. But Minus 7 to Aviva when Carole told her her husband died of cancer. Aviva's response, "I hate cancer."

Is there anyone who loves it? 

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The Real Housewives of New York City returns tonight with a new season and, if you don't plan on watching the scripted antics of some of the world's most spoiled women, allow us to quote the following new Bravo trailer:

ARE YOU CRAZY?!?

Still featuring Countess LuAnn de Lesseps, Sonja Morgan and Ramona Singer, season five will introduce fans to cast members that include Aviva Drescher, Carole Radziwill and Heather Thomson.

Look for Drescher, as teased in the first Real Housewives of New York City trailer, to fit right in, labeling Ramona and Sonja "white trash" and setting a tone early on for what's ahead.

Watch new footage from the ridiculous, nauseating series below.

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On June 4, Bravo will debut a new season of The Real Housewives of New York, replete with new cast members and new scripted drama!

That's right, Jill Zarin, Alex McCord, Cindy Barshop and Kelly Bensimon are out; Carole Radziwill, Heather Thomson and Aviva Drescher are in.

But, don't worry fans, the new ladies are just as irritating and clueless as the old ones, as evidenced by one asking in the following sneak preview: "Do you think we're part of the one percent?"

Other lowlights include: Countess LuAnn calling out Ramona for blackmailing her; the gang getting trashed in the tropics; and Aviva referring to Ramona and Sonja "white trash." Yup. She fits right in...

The Real Housewives of New York Season 5 Trailer

Alex McCord is no longer a part of the Bravo family, and we all what that means: time to bash the show that made her famous!

The New York Post has printed excerpts from an email Alex allegedly sent to friends in which she goes off The Real Housewives of New York City.

“While we were sad to lose the dollars... we weren’t sad to be off that particular show,” the email reads. “Now that we are free-and-clear of our Bravo contracts, we have been meeting with... just about every cable network as well as a couple of the main networks.”

The McCords are considering a new series titled "Based in Brooklyn" that would center on 30-something parents in that borough.

And they want to assure friends it won't be akin to any Real Housewives, writing: "We would never expose ourselves to another faux reality show."

Ooohh, slam!

[Photo: WENN.com]

Kelly Bensimon continues to put up a strong front.

The reality star got the boot this summer from The Real Housewives of New York City, but tells Us Weekly she is "not angry" because, hey, she'll still be on television for years to come!

"The show is on all over the world and we're still going to be on for a long time," Kelly says. "It's like the Baywatch of Housewives. For me, it's just the gift that keeps on giving."

Kelly isn't familiar with the show's new cast members - Carole Radziwill, Heather Thomson and Aviva Drescher - but she has the following advice for the trio:

"Make as many mistakes as possible. Do anything that you can do that you can learn from your mistakes. Because if you don't learn from your mistakes then you're what? Boring!"

Will we see Bensimon on reality TV again? She hopes so, saying: "I love doing reality because for me, I just have a really good time. And I have a really kooky life and I'm not going to make apologies for it. I have a lot of fun and I make a lot of mistakes."

[Photo: WENN.com]