by Free Britney at . Comments

Here comes the drama.

Hanging out by the pool. Doesn't that sound relaxing? Yes, unless you're on The Real Housewives of New Jersey. Then it's pretty much the exact opposite.

Then you'll probably need a stiff drink to get through an afternoon in the sun.

We recap all the fussing, feuding, and name calling in our THG's +/- recap!

Teresa G. Photo

How can you not love Caroline's mock phone call between Teresa and Joe? It was hilarious. Plus 10

And why does Caroline think Teresa hates Melissa. Because "she's a better, younger version" of Teresa. Plus 8. That sounds about right.

But as everyone else is discussing Teresa's behavior, Teresa is telling her husband her version of the Solstice party and Joe has some definite opinions.

First, Melissa is a horse-face, gold digging tramp. Caroline is boring. Rosie's a butchy boy, and the idiot cousin (I can only assume he means Kathy ... no offense to Kathy) looks like a frog. 

Joe Guidice certainly has an opinion about everyone but the scariest is the one he holds about himself. He tells Teresa he's the powerhouse and she doesn't need anyone else. Minus 12. What happens when they haul his sorry butt off to jail again?

Oh, and Teresa says her brother is a little pansy for telling his wife about their conversation. How can you not love family?

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by Free Britney at . Comments

The Real Housewives of New Jersey celebrated the Summer Solstice by trying to open up their third eye chakra on last night's episode. Yeah, we don't know what that means either but we break it all down here in THG's +/- recap!

Teresa is excellent ... at placing blame. On taking responsibility, not so much.

First off she's still upset about her husband's black eye which of course is all Richie's fault. Minus 12. I'm sure poor Joe was just an innocent bystander in that scuffle.

Who is she kidding? But in usual Teresa fashion she can't let it go. She even tells Rich he could have poked his eye out. 

Real Housewives of NJ Pic

Joe's a big boy. I'm sure he can fight his own battles.

Of course it's hard to tell who has the brains in the Guidice family. We know Joe's had at least one DWI, then was caught driving with a suspended license, and finally took someone else's ID to try and get a new license. Minus 15.

Somehow the guy can always find a way to make a bad situation worse.

Teresa cries about what's being said in magazine articles about her and her family but even Jacqueline realizes that Teresa's making her own problems there so Plus 8. She agreed to do the interview and I'm sure she got paid handsomely for it. Now she's crying?

While everyone's down the shore their problems simmer under the surface. The kids look like the only ones having fun but they're also allowed to run wild.

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by Free Britney at . Comments

The Real Housewives of New Jersey made their way back from the shore this week to play a little poker and kick one little Jersey girl out of the her luxurious nest.

We break down all the drama in our patented THG +/- recap below!

Say bye bye. That was Jacqueline's response as Ashlee whined about packing to leave for Vegas. Plus 10 because it was so pathetic it was funny.

They sent her off with Albie to avoid a family meltdown at the airport hoping that she'd get on the plane without incident. It sounds good…in theory.

Jersey-ites

Minus 7 because Albie couldn't be bothered to park the car and walk his wayward cousin to the security checkpoint. Instead he drops her at the curb and there's no doubt she'll be home by dark.

Sure enough, Albie gets the call as he's driving home. Somehow Ashlee missed her flight. Minus 12. This girl is pathetic. I know it's because she doesn't want to go but it is sad when a 20-year-old can't check herself in at an airport. 

Chris is right, his step-daughter has no common sense. Her answer to stress is wishing she could buy herself a drink. Ashlee may be headed down a hard road all of her own making. 

This time Chris drives her to the airport to make sure it's done right. Plus 10. At home Jacqueline looks at pictures of her little girl and cries. I understand she's upset but it's not like some awful tragedy has befallen her daughter. Ashlee's a spoiled brat and when people stop handing her stuff maybe she'll grow up.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

You know what they say about apologies: they aren't sincere unless you make six figures off publishing them in a supermarket tabloid.

Teresa Giudice has taken this saying to heart and penned an open letter to her Real Housewives of New Jersey castmates. It's included in the latest issue of In Touch Weekly and, in addressing Jacqueline, Melissa, Kathy and Caroline, it reads:

"I wish I could take it all back and start over."

Teresa Giudice on In Touch Weekly Cover

On last Sunday's season four premiere - which drew record ratings for Bravo - Giudice dissed and also dismissed Gorga, her sister-in-law, saying she'd leave husband Joe in a heartbeat for a richer man.

Melissa lashed out in response, saying she was hurt by Teresa's comments and they simply aren't valid.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Yup, viewers still love those crazy Real Housewives of New Jersey.

Sunday night's season four premiere garnered three million viewers for Bravo, earning a spot as the most-viewed season premiere in network history.

Real Housewives of New Jersey Season Premiere Pic

The episode featured your basic fighting among cast members, highlighted by Teresa Giudice (above) saying sister-in-law Melissa Gorga would leave her husband if a richer man entered the picture.

Gorga didn't respond kindly to those comments.

An hour prior to this premiere, The Real Housewives of Atlanta reunion matched its counterpart, as 3.2 million people (who may need to re-evaluate their lives) tuned in to watch grown women stage scripted arguments.

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

The Real Housewives of New Jersey kicked off season four last night, and very little looked or sounded different to veteran viewers of this franchise.

Main case in point: Melissa Gorga is still have problems with Teresa Giudice, especially after the latter claimed - during the premiere - that Gorga would leave Teresa's husband, Joe, if a "richer man" came along.

Melissa Gorga on The Real Housewives of New Jersey

"I'm trying everything I can to bite my tongue and give a pass here and there, but [her comments] hurt because that's family," Gorga told Us Weekly after the episode aired. "What she said [about Joe and I] made no sense. She had no rhyme or reason to say it. It's very obvious it's not the case and not true."

Why would Teresa make such statement? Her sibling had a theory, which he expressed on the opening installment.

"I believe that she's living a rough life with her husband, she's unhappy and misery loves company," Joe Gorga said.

by Free Britney at . Comments

The Real Housewives of New Jersey are back and the feuding continues, but this time they're leaving their McMansions and taking it down to the Jersey shore.

Let's assess all the cussing, name calling, and backstabbing in THG +/- review!

It looks like no one has talked much since Teresa Guidice's infamous cookbook came out. Between the digs about her being as Italian as the Olive Garden and rehashing her son's brilliant idea for a strip car wash, Caroline Manzo is still pretty ticked off. 

The Real Housewives of NJ

The two women end up meeting at a party at Jacqueline's and Caroline's doing an admirable job of freezing Teresa out but Teresa wants to talk. She says she wants to clear the air. Minus 10 because why wait for a family party to do that?

Why not just pick up the phone or go on over to Caroline's? I suppose the show wouldn't be fun if any of it made sense.

So Teresa apologizes…sort of.

"I think you misread it because if you really read it good you'd realize I didn't insult you." Really?  hat's your idea of an apology? Telling someone you didn't read it good? Minus 15 and I'm not even counting the grammar issues.

Teresa just keeps repeating that it was all a joke but Teresa's the only one who finds it funny.

And apparently this is not a good time to be messing with Caroline. She's going though menopause and isn't thrilled when her doctor tells her she's getting old. Plus 8 because even she admits she may go super bitch on someone who crosses her right now.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

The new season of The Real Housewives of New Jersey premieres on April 22, and it will be filled with calm, rational discussions around the dinner table, each week ending in a group hug and a reminder of just why these women are such close friends.

JUST KIDDING! Upcoming episodes will be chock full of drama, fighting and "a lot of hurtful and shocking moments," says Teresa Giudice.

Always at the center of the action, Giudice tells People she's "still saddened by what transpired," a lot of which had to do with sister-in-law Melissa Gorga.

"Melissa and I are family and we have our ups and downs just like any family. That is life," says Giudice, who Gorga believes tried to expose her past as a stripper last year, a past Gorga denies.

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by Hilton Hater at . Comments

There are evil people out there – and sometimes they come in the shape of your friends. - Teresa Giudice 

Run away, coward. Like you always do! - Melissa Gorga

When you associate with scum, you become scum. - Kathy Wakile

The Real Housewives of New Jersey kicks off season four on April 22 and, you won't believe this, but major drama is on the way, as evidenced by the aforementioned quotes, all of which are included in the following trailer. Intrigued? We thought you might be.

Prepare for scripted insanity and get an idea of what's on the way to Bravo now:

by Hilton Hater at . Comments

Are we headed for a cast shake-up on The Real Housewives of New Jersey?

According to the latest issue of Reality Weekly, Bravo is pondering major changes to this installment of its popular franchise, as Jacqueline Laurita and Caroline Manzo would be the most likely to go if the network goes in a new direction.

Jacqueline Laurita on Bravo

“They’re always looking for new cast members that would add something to the show,” an insider says. “They’ve been heavily courting a few people from other networks who have shows.”

Both Laurita and Manzo have played a role on the series since season one, but loyalty isn't relevant, this source adds. Only Teresa Giudice is guaranteed to return next season, the premiere date for which has not yet been announced.

Who do you want to see leave The Real Housewives of New Jersey?

 

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